“I’m thankful for a pair of shoes that feel really good on my feet; I like my shoes.
I’m thankful for the birds; I feel like they’re singing just for me when I get up in the morning… Saying, ‘Good morning, John. You made it, John.’
I’m thankful for the sea breeze that feels so good right now, and the scent of jasmine when the sun starts going down.
I’m thankful…” ~Johnny Cash
Today I woke up in a state of deep gratitude. I often live in gratitude but I’m not always as conscious of the depth of it as I was this morning. I woke up early to the sound of cars outside and construction work off in the distance, which I love to hear!
It was so beautiful to hear. And my little pomchi was all curled up sleeping on me. My adorable baby! I was flooded with gratitude for the personalities of my sweet furbabies!
I love cuddly dogs who love to snuggle with me under the blankies!
And I was (still am) very thankful that I was exhausted all day yesterday, with my exhaustion increasing then decreasing off and on. It was hard to work at some points. And today I’m also incredibly exhausted and fatigued.
I am depressed and have been very depressed for a week now. Last week my depression was severe emotional pain and suicidal inclination. This week I’m not suicidal and it’s not so much emotional pain but lack of energy, food and everything tasting bland, music doesn’t sound as good, my whole body feels heavy…
The reason I am so thankful for this struggle is I used to live like this almost constantly for years, this horrible exhaustion and fatigue and depression. Day after day, year after year.
It would lift occasionally, sometimes even lift for a few months then go back to severe depression.
The fatigue was horrible. I had trouble staying awake at work and in school. I had to take naps all day.
I stuffed myself with junk food, which I’m sure made my fatigue worse and even brought it on sometimes.
Fatigue and depression was just how I lived.
But in May 2010, I began to truly get myself better and through the years better and better and now I still have depressive episodes and symptoms sometimes, sometimes even frequently, but they are not as often and they are usually easier for me to handle.
Like I mention sometimes, depression that I speak of is not a mere mood, attitude, or grim outlook on like. It’s like a Sickness. I can even often, now, separate my attitude and the depression. Just because I’m depressed doesn’t mean I can’t be positive about it or even have a sense of happiness with it. Not always, but sometimes.
And depression isn’t always a low mood even if it usually is. Like now, it’s more physical and other symptoms but I’m not miserable.
Right now, I’m not the happiest girl on Earth like I usually am! Lol But I’m not on the brink of killing myself either like last week!
😀
Anyway, my couple of days of exhaustion and fatigue, really stood out and because of this I am reminded that I no longer live this way. It’s so rare now that when it hits, it’s startling.
This is a good thing! I love thinking about how much better I am now.
Even when I’m severely depressed, I’m usually not that fatigued anymore. I appreciate this reminder and it also reminds me to be thankful for unusual things we may often overlook.
Even though I’m depressed, I’m still overflowing with gratitude, some points it’s so deep. It IS possible to be both depressed and grateful. It’s not always going to happen and the gratitude likely won’t be as deep as when we aren’t depressed but we can still be thankful.
Here is a truly beautiful song about being grateful for everything, looking on the bright side of life no matter what. ❤
"I've got a heart that can hold love
I've got a mind that can think
There may be times when I lose the light
And let my spirits sink
But I can't stay depressed
When I remember how I'm blessed" ~John Bucchino
Grateful – Sung by John Bucchino -mobile
“Grateful, grateful
Truly grateful I am
Grateful, grateful
Truly blessed
And duly grateful”
😀
Much love & light to you, now & for always. ❤
xoxo Kim
You are the strongest and most beautiful person I have the good fortune to know. Youre absolutely overflowing with positive energy. I’m glad you’re better than you used to be. The world is a better place coz it has you in it! Love and light to you too😘
Thank you so, so much!! I am so honored you feel that way! I was thinking of you and your blog right before I saw your comment. The blogs I mostly see the most are the ones that come through to my e-mail inbox and unfortunately some of my favorite blogs, like yours, do not. So I have to keep better track of the ones that don’t come through. I hardly see my reader while using my phone. Your comment brightens my world and is so heartwarming to receive! ❤
😀 I'm thankful to have you as my friend!
A couple of things I do when I feel depressed and low energy. Go for a walk. Go to my Chiropractor because more likely then not, my spine is out of alignment. I eat good, I sleep good. And I bury my head in things I LOVE. BIG (((HUGS))) I’ve been struggling with depression my entire life. It comes down to choices on how to react to the “feelings”. ❤ ❤ ❤
Thank you so much, Amy!! ❤ I love walking! It's one of my favorite things but I don't always make it a point to walk when I'm depressed. Thank you for the reminder! I heard that chiropractic treatment can be very helpful, even to those without medical conditions. When I get more money, I would love to try it! I'm so happy you found things that help you and thank you for sharing with me!
Yes, I have struggled with it most of my whole life too and I completely agree, it's all about how we choose to react to it even when we can't control the depression itself.
Thank you so much for sharing your beauty and love with me! I always appreciate it and thank you for your friendship!
❤ 😀
Especially when you are feeling down, walking is SO important. Today I was feeling down and the last thing I wanted was to go for a walk. That couch looked so good! I paced back and forth in my kitchen, talking outloud saying I WILL GO FOR A WALK! Sometimes the hardest thing is to walk out of the door. I did it, my friend. AND I spoke to such a lovely woman for about one hour, someone who was an utter and complete Gift to me! I will not give in to depression. There are times I let go and allow it to enfold me, and in its embrace I gain something to bring back with me to the Light. Not today though. I pushed through and am SO glad I did!!! BIG (((HUGS))) ❤ ❤ ❤
That’s so great that you took that simple but significant step! Sometimes very seemingly simple things that others may take for granted can be so hard for someone with depression or other conditions! Good for you for taking that step! It’s beautiful that you met an Earth angel while out & about! I love meeting people! ❤ That's an amazing attitude to have about not giving in. I think like that often, it will not conquer me! I can relate to you about letting it pull me in sometimes but then discovering deeper wisdom & greater strength but other occasions not letting it suck me in like that. I'm so happy you found a great way to cope! Keep going strong, I'm cheering for you, always!! ❤ Hugs & love to you!! 😀
❤ ❤ ❤
“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” – Rumi
I love this quote! I have a necklace with it! Thank you for reading! ❤