Tag Archive | beauty

Spring. 🌸🐞🐿

“There are signs of spring appearing all around, assuring me that the natural world is re-awakening, despite the fact that it does not yet feel like spring.

There are still piles of snow on the ground and icicles hanging from the roof tops, and the overnight temp last night was a cool 15 degrees!

But in spite of what feels like winter’s final, desperate cling, there are buds sprouting on the trees, hundreds of birds returning to the garden, newborn ducklings, squirrels aplenty, and, perhaps, the most awe-inspiring sign has been the visits of two bald eagles, who have been flying overhead, right over my backyard at dusk each night, perhaps nesting in a special spot nearby!”

This is something I received in an e-mail through a soulfulliving.com subscription, written by Valerie. I was going to share my photo above, on Instagram, and caption it, “Spring is in the air!” Then I realized today actually is the first day of Spring here. I totally did not realize til someone told me lol

It sure doesn’t feel like Spring; it’s freezing cold and we’re having a snow blizzard. I love it! But also love Spring weather & am so happy for the impending Springy weather and everything that comes along with it.

This beautiful piece, I shared above, by Valerie, inspires me and is a beautiful reminder of how inspiring nature is.

I have been struggling a bit with lower back pain. It’s not chronic pain; it’s only temporary (at least I hope so!) but it does tend to get quite severe every now & again. Sometimes I can’t reach for things and it throbs whether I’m sitting, standing, or laying and occasionally I get just very little to no relief. It is difficult because I work with dogs! So it’s kind of hard managing back pain & physical limitations with a bunch of furballs jumping all over me and pulling me. Lol

At some points, I found it difficult to have an interest in anything because the pain consumes me. It’s definitely not the worst pain I ever felt and generally, it’s not unbearable. Pain of any sort or any level isnt fun though! I’m also sick and exhausted. Im laying in bed now half sleeping but still managing to think & write. Lol

For about two months, I have worked seven days a week(I generally work seven days a week and love it but have been working many, many more hours than usual), some days, 24 hours(overnight), morning til night. Some days I was out for work at 6 something in the morning til around 10:00pm. I LOVE the job. This much physical work really takes a toll on the body though. My poor body needs a break. It has been under a tremendous amount of stress. (At least it’s work that I love though)

As Valerie states in her message, it doesn’t feel like Spring. It’s cold, snowy, icy…but there are signs of Spring everywhere, still blooming through the harsh Wintery weather. Spring blooms and life blossoms are around. Snow, ice, cold, Winter, doesn’t hinder it.

I am reminded that we can do the same. We can blossom, keep going, and let our beauty bloom all around straight through the pain, stress, exhaustion, depression, anxiety, grief…or whatever other struggles we may currently be experiencing.

We can channel that inner-spring and unleash it, sending it out into the uni-verse to lift everyone around us. Look for all the little gems of beauty we can find, all the flowers, acts of kindness, butterflies, animals, smiles, hugs, laughs, pretty colors, inspirational quotes, uplifting social media/blog posts, the love of a pet, a favorite song or food, the feel of soft blankets, the fragrance of flowers, food, coffee, cookies baking….any little bit of beauty…these are the things to focus on, to dwell on, to embrace.

I’m happy to share this soulfulliving message here along with my experience and hope others can be inspired also, to keep going & appreciate all the simple joys of living.

We all have an inner-spring just waiting to be embraced & unleashed!

Much love & light, & hugs!!

Xoxo KimπŸ’πŸ’š

F.E.A.R

My therapist recently told me that we have a choice for how to handle fear. We can Fuck Everything and Run (lol!) or Face Everything and Recover. He said that both are ok but of course facing & recovering is more healthy and in the end will likely bring us the more desired results.

Recently, I encountered a scary situation. And I remembered my F.E.A.R choices. And I chose to……fuck everything and run. Lol!

The scary situation? Having to go into a building with an elevator.

In case you don’t know, I’m deathly afraid of being closed in small places alone, especially elevators – always have been and don’t know why – sometimes I actually feel like I’m going to die when I just think about it; I actually feel like death is around me, squeezing me, suffocating me. You can read more about my struggles & victories in these posts if you want!

It actually freaking happened

Serendipitous Strength

welcome to rock bottom – the only way is up

My choices? To suck it up and get on the elevator & know I have the courage & strength to handle it (going up I have to get on because the door to stairs is locked but coming back down, I can take the stairs), to take advantage of this opportunity for growth or to take the stairs and avoid that fear and the possibility of getting trapped on one by myself. And yes, I chose the second. :-/

Generally, I’m really good with facing my fear and even staying calm and getting inside the elevators alone. But this is the building where I recently got stuck in one, very briefly but still not pleasant(and I handled it so well, I must say!) and I just felt that I was in no mood for any nonsense that morning. Lol

It’s good for me to get onto elevators alone as much as I can so I can stregthen my courage & inner peace with them. I haven’t suffered any terrible relapse recently. But it’s possible that I can as I have before. Sometimes my heart still races a bit and my hands almost tremble when I get onto elevators alone but sometimes I’m very calm when I do. For a while, my phobic fear was pretty much gone, healed, recoverd. But I suffered a relapse a while ago and began to struggle again. Nowhere near as badly as before but still a bit of a struggle.

The morning I was in that building, I was struggling with the phobic fear and wasn’t up to facing it.

So when the elevator doors opened, I bolted and ran for the stairs.

I won’t make a habit of it. I will still choose to get into elevators alone and know I can handle whatever comes my way. I will remember my strength and progress and accomplishments. But there will also be moments I’ll give into weakness, forget my strength and courage and take the easy way, the way that doesn’t allow as much growth and an opportunity to strengthen my courage & virtue of patience. And that’s ok too!

We don’t always, always have to be strong and brave and inspiring and positive and perfect.

I’m generally very positive and mostly use social media for sharing inspirational and/or happy/positive things. But I also think it’s good to be genuine and share my not so inspiring experiences/choices. Like running away and not facing my fear.

I was disappointed that I couldn’t write a post about how I was brave and strong in the face of my phobic fear and how I handled it like a pro! Lol I was sorry I couldn’t use my own experience to try to inspire others or encourage someone to be brave, feel the fear and do it anyway. I could have written that post but it would be dishonest.

But then I remembered that sharing our weaknesses and less than pleasant aspects and experiences can be just as inspiring and just as encouraging and uplifting to others as sharing our strengths. There are others who run, make mistakes, have setbacks, do things that aren’t the best. And sharing this can help each other see that someone else understands and that it’s actually ok. We have permission to not always be positive and strong and brave. We have permission to falter. To stumble. To fall. We have permission to run once in a while. Just so long as it doesn’t become a habit or way of life, it’s all good! And if it does become an unhealthy habit, that’s ok, we can fix it. Habits can be reversed. Fall and get back up.

Feel the fear and do it anyway.

Or not.

Whatever you choose, I’m here cheering you on!

Virtual Hugs to you! ❀ (virtual hugs are good for all because even if you don’t like actual hugs, you’re not actually being touched. lol)

Xoxo Kim

OpportunityπŸ’œ

Let’s plants seeds of love everywhere we go through acts of kindness, kind intentions, speech, thoughts….and the world will be a much more beautiful place! And if kindness isn’t currently our lifestyle, we can practice til it is! And if it already is, we can strengthen it through even more loving intentions & actions!❀ Let’s start with smiling at everyone we look at today & wishing everyone well! 😊

Much love & light,

Kim

My current gratitude list❀

(Scout! Just after midnight this morning😻)

1.) Im thankful for my job & that i got to spend the whole night last night, into the morning with a sweet, adorable, funny, beautiful girl named Scout!
2.) Im thankful i stayed in a place last night where the walls are paper thin n i got to hear a big, loud party going on next door with lots of joyous laughter, yelling, singing, stuff being banged around….& a bunch of drunk people singing “Sweet Home Alabama” and yelling other drunken things. So funny! I kept falling asleep and waking up to it all night long into the morning. I dont mind people being loud all night and actually like it. It brought me joy all night/morning to hear the joy of others! I couldn’t see it but have a very vivid imagination & all the noise I heard conjured up all these funny images in my head making me laugh out loud! Scout wasn’t as thrilled and was barking at them through the walls! Lol
3.) Thankful my pain disorder hasn’t been acting up. It’s generally not bad at all but tends to flare up now & again to seemingly unbearably levels. Last year in February, I suffered four of the most devastating, difficult days I ever experienced and the worst cluster of this life of mine. Almost a year later and i haven’t felt it that bad since then!
4.) Thankful Scout slept all cuddled with me last night
5.) Thankful for hot caramel lattes!
6.) For life itself
7.) My ability to turn my neck, walk move, my senses…
8.) Winter – My favorite season!
9.) Buddha’s teachings
10.) All of the people & animals I get to know & meet for my work

Im going to post this on Instagram later too with a pic of me! I have to wait til my hair dries and try to get a good picture lol I haven’t taken a picture of myself in so long it seems!

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are and thinking of all the things you have to give thanks for!❀

Much love & light,

Xoxo Kim

Always be my baby❀

“You’ll always be a part of me
I’m part of you indefinitely
Boy don’t you know you can’t escape me
Ooh darling ’cause you’ll always be my baby
And we’ll linger on
Time can’t erase a feeling this strong
No way you’re never gonna shake me
Ooh darling ’cause you’ll always be my baby”❀

Always Be My Baby – Mariah Carrey

Recently, I experienced one of the most heartbreaking aspects of my job. The most difficult part of the job is losing the animals I take care of, either to death or them moving away. Them dying is more painful. If they move away, they are still happy & healthy, & alive!😊 But it’s still so incredibly painful when it happens.

And recently this happened. One of my babies moved away to another state. I’m devastated. πŸ’” I had no idea that was going to happen. Just last week, we stood together, hugging, and I thought about how I can stay like this forever. Just holding a big dog in my arms. The best feeling in the world!πŸ’™

He is a big, big boy! He stands up on his back legs and hugs and kisses. He is a big teddy bear who loves everyone. It’s heartbreaking and devastating to not get to see him anymore. But that’s just the way it is. We live, love, & lose. My grief seems overwhelming at some points but I know it’s not a bad thing at all. It’s just what happens when we love & lose. It happens to me again & again & again throughout the years because I have had so many pets of my own and now take care of animals for my job. There’s so much grief and loss but only because there’s so, so much love!❀

I always endure the grief, survive it, & move forward. Each loss is new and different and there’s not really any getting used to it completely. But since it happens over & over, it’s not completely new and I know what’s coming and how I have endured it before and will again, for sure. It’s probably easier for me than for someone who isn’t as accustomed to it.

Last night while laying in bed, I felt that old, familiar throbbing throughout my whole existence, but for someone new. That same urgent throbbing like having a severely abscessed tooth, but much worse. The same “How can this be?” The same wringing of the hands.

And I just let it throb, just let it be, embracing it and knowing it just is what it is.

I thought about how Mac will always be my baby no matter what. Distance & time doesn’t matter. Our lives crossed and touched and nothing can change that. I love him & he loves me and being separated can’t take that away.

I remembered this song sung by Mariah Carrey, which I always loved! Last night though, I really listened to the lyrics and let them sink in. I realized how it’s a song about true, non attached love. She is singing about how she will let him go, let him fly, if that’s what he wants. But she will always love him. That is true love! Letting someone go if we must, for whatever reason, but still loving the person. I found it soothing & healing. And now have been listening to it over and over!πŸ˜†

Loving doesn’t mean we have to see someone or be in contact. We can love/wish others the best, hope they are happy, healthy, & living wherever in the world they are. And if they are dead we can still be thankful our lives crossed.

I’m so thankful that Mac is a happy boy, healthy, and alive, and so loved by his family! (And me!❀) That’s all that matters! And he’ll always be my baby! (Even though he’s actually not mine…I have to remind myself every now & again that no matter how much I love them, they are not my own!πŸ˜†)

Hugs & love,

Xoxo Kim ❀

Snow Day!!!β„β˜ƒβ›‡β›„β˜•

“Kindness is like snow; it beautifies everything it covers.”

Recently we had a snow day here in Philadelphia! Then today we had a snowy morning! This is one of my babies playing in the snow! I just love him! He looovveess snow! He loves holidays and loud noises, talking decorations, and people & doggies! He’s a big teddy bear named Zero!❀

One of the most joyous things to witness in this life is a dog or a human child experiencing pure, raw joy, like right here! He is thrilled!

Here are some of my other snowday pics!β›„β›‡β˜ƒβ„β­πŸŒŸπŸ‘ΌπŸŽ€πŸŒ²πŸ­πŸŽ‘πŸŽπŸ’Ÿ

Snow angel❀

This is a kind of coffee called holiday blend. It sounds very good and has molasses and cinnamon and sounds/looks better than it tasted! β˜•

This is a pic I took for my mom because she loves angels.πŸ‘Όβ€πŸ˜‡

This is a sweet ass car right here! The first thing I thought as soon as I first saw it is, goodness that CAR!

The thing must have cost a pretty penny and the vibrant red color is stunning. I’m not interested in cars and don’t even drive but I want this! Just because it’s totally impressive to have. πŸ˜‚ There’s a little bit of shallow in me, oh well!😍

I hope you are having a lovely day or night wherever in the world you are!

Much love & light,

xoxo Kim ❀

Claudia.

(NOT my photo but so lovely)

“Sometimes people are beautiful. Not in looks. Not in what they say. Just in what they are.”

Today I met a strong, beautiful woman named Claudia. Shortly after meeting her I had a rare thought. I thought:

I like her. I want to be like her.

It’s not rare for me to like someone but for me to actually, necessarily want to be like someone is rare. When I had the thought, it wasn’t unpleasant or negative or jealous or in a competitive way. It was more like me being so inspired by another woman’s beauty (not physical beauty, though Claudia is beautiful inside & out) which resonates so much with my own, that I want to reach deep within and unleash my own beauty in a more profound way. I want to strengthen it.

Something about her reminded me of me. She has a quiet, calm, simple, matter-of-fact, way about her. Not just displayed by how she talks or acts but just how she is.

While talking to her, she complimented another woman to me. There is nothing more beautiful than girls complimenting other girls.

And when she complimented me, it was sincere and not condescending like she thought I needed validation. Her only intention was to encourage & uplift.

Around her, I sensed a safe place. A place of no judgment, only love, acceptance, warmth.

She has a job helping, serving others, a job that takes deep compassion & great strength, both of what she displays so genuinely.

When I met her, I thought of the quote I shared above & was reminded of the beautiful song sung by Billy Joel, She’s got a way.

She’s got a light around her.

She’s got a way – Billy Joel

Claudia certainly has a way about her.

Humble but confident. Soft but strong. Tender, yet firm. Fiercely compassionate and very kind.

How beautiful it is to inspire someone simply by being. BEing our honest self. Not trying to be someone or something else. No matter who/what we are, someone, somewhere desires/longs for just that. Loud, quiet, warm, firm, syrupy sweet, badass, bitchy, reserved or very demonstrative….some of these things will resonate with some while others will resonate with someone else.

Keep on keeping on! You never know who your own beauty is inspiring!❀

I want to be an even better me after meeting Claudia.

Much love & light,

Xoxo Kim

FLIP the gratitude switch

“There is success embedded in every failure.
Without gratitude, failure is nothing more than disappointment.
There is joy embedded in despair.
Without gratitude, despair is nothing more than a hole left unfilled.
There is hope embedded in tragedy. Without gratitude, tragedy is nothing more than loss of hope.
There is healing embedded in pain. Without gratitude, pain is simply unnecessary.
There is a new beginning embedded in every ending.
Without gratitude, endings are always final.”

Found this in a book by Kevin Clayson. FLIP the Gratitude Switch How empowering! I am naturally positive & optimistic but it’s definitely good to have reminders sometimes and work to strengthen that natural positive disposition!

In every situation we can experience, there is something to be thankful for. Even if the experience itself doesn’t seem to have a bright side, there is something good we can give thanks for in the midst of it or we can allow the terrible, or merely unpleasant, experience to inspire us to do good for others. For example, if we have a difficult disability or illness, or other painful experience, we can reach out to others in similar situations and be a source of comfort & light, as we know just what it’s like. If we lose someone to an illness or other tragedy, we can support organizations that promote awareness or treatment/cures/support….for those struggling with the illness or whatever it may be, & their family/friends. If we hear about a massacre in the news, we can make the decision to donate blood, platelets, power red….if we are eligible, not just for those in that massacre but for people in general who may need it(every 56 days we can donate BLOOD if we want & keep someone else ALIVE!).

(Redcrossblood.org)

Let horrific and other difficult things inspire us to act in love & gives thanks for the opportunities. πŸ’—

We can bring positivity into a place where there seems to be none, even if just in our head. A shift in attitude.

The not so good experience can be something severe like chronic pain, depression, grief & loss or something seemingly small & trivial next to those things like a flat car tire, spilling something on our clothes, stuck in traffic…

At least it’s only a flat tire, not the engine broken, at least we have a car to have a flat tire, give thanks for the ability to get into a car & drive, at least we’re just stuck in traffic & not killed in traffic or in a collision…

This isn’t at all promoting giving thanks that it’s us still alive while someone else isn’t or being relieved that someone else is the unfortunate one. I will never promote that and I don’t believe Mr. Clayson is promoting that either. The point is simply to look at our own situation and see the good in it whatever else is going on. We can all do this. Being thankful for our own goodness isn’t going to hurt others and repressing gratitude out of guilt that we are better off than some, isn’t going to help them at all. So let’s give thanks!

An example I have, which is more on the trivial side but still sucks, is yesterday morning, one of my dogs (one who I take care of for someone, not one of the ones I live with), broke my phone! Oh rats! He’s a very wild boy, doesn’t always listen, & is very strong. He knocks me over when we’re playing! He wasn’t listening to me and he shattered the part of my phone that takes pictures! That’s the last part I want broken, as I love taking pics most days! Oh well.

But instantly, I thought, at least my phone still turns on, the apps still work, I still can take pics, all my info wasn’t lost, it’s so good to have a job working with animals (even when they destroy my stuff!), I’m not sick today…Instead of a stream of negative thoughts like how disappointing, now I have to spend money on a new phone, why couldn’t it have been a different part that broke…I chose to see the good in this situation and just the general good.

Then last night, he jumped into a big puddle, soaking my shoes & socks and wetting my pants. He was all soaked n jumped on me, rubbing his wet face & chest all off on my new hoodie. And the water he jumped in smelled like sour stuff because there was food all dissolved in it.

Of course, I laughed hysterically! It was very uncomfortable, physically but I got a good belly laugh out of it. And’s it’s adorable how he cleaned himself all off on my clothes. 😍 Again, I saw the light in this situation. Any of us can do this on any occasion!

It is important to keep in mind that no matter how unimportant/trivial the unpleasant experience is, this life philosophy applies to it. Each day, many/most/all of us experience minor stresses or annoyances like dropping something, encountering someone we would prefer not to, seeing a post on social media we don’t like,….if we practice FLIPing with these simple things, we will be more equip with skills to cope with more deeply disappointing or devastating things like illness, grief/loss, other more serious situations.

Sometimes it will be easier to see the bright side than others and occasionally, we may have to force it but it can be done even if we have to “fake it til we make it” sometimes. Keep practicing & making the choice to see the good and it will become easier & easier until it’s a way of life.

To keep choosing over & over throughout each day whenever something unpleasant happens, even something very small and trivial like our shoelace untying, all the way up to the horrific & tragic, like someone dying, to give thanks for what is still good, is life-altering, for the better.

Keep making that choice, no matter how difficult it may be, to FLIP that switch & shine light on the goodness! πŸ’–

Much love & light to you, always! πŸ’–

Xoxo Kim

With love, xoxo❀

“If you clean the floor with love, you have given the world an invisible painting.” πŸ’–

My job is to love, both as an action/verb & also just in the form of emotion. It’s my job in this life in general and also my paid job, loving animals and the people whose pets they are. There are things I have to do for practical purposes, filling the water bowl, food bowl, snapping their harnesses on, putting on coats & booties, putting down potty mats, cleaning up accidents in houses/apartments, cleaning litter boxes, picking up πŸ’© with doggy bags, giving medication/supplements….these are the practical things but I realize they are not only that. Just like playing, cuddles, kisses, pets & hugs, all these practical acts, the things that seem more like work and may at first appear to be just “means to an end,” just something that has to be done and over with so we can get to the more fun, pleasant things like playing and going for walks, they too are acts of love. They may not be as obviously loving acts as the hugs and kisses and playing but are part of loving an animal. To get to do these things is a gift.

My baby πŸ’œ

This little baby in the picture with me is a sweet girl who I generally take care of five days a week, sometimes more, while her mommies are at work. Sometimes I even get to have sleepovers with her! 😍 I have known her for almost a year and love her like my own! One day a while ago, my schedule was a little bit different and she was assigned to a different petsitter that day. As I was leaving, I realized how much I would really miss the seemingly little things, like filling her water bowl and setting it on the floor for her. Of course I would miss playing with her, the cuddles, & kisses, & walking with her. But not so obvious are the small practical things like simply filling her water bowl for her. It’s something we may take for granted if we aren’t careful.

My experience with not having her on my schedule that day, reminded me more, to always cherish the little things, the mundane, the practical. I always honor the love in these acts.

One of the best things about my job is that I get to experience loving animals the way their own humans love them. Like I mentioned, love, is a feeling but also a verb/action. We all love our pets in different ways. Some people love their dogs by spoiling them and giving them food that isn’t for animals, while others love their dogs by not allowing them “people food.” Some love their dogs by making them go for walks even if they don’t want to go out, because they think it’s good for them, while others give in & let the furbaby stay in. Some people express love for their dogs, putting a coat on them when it’s cold, buying them a doggy bed, lots of toys, while others love theirs just as much but not doing these things.

Some of these things aren’t important for me to do with my own dogs/cat. But if it’s important to the person whose pet I am taking care of, it becomes just as important to me to do for the pet even if I don’t do that for my own. I love getting to experience loving all of these babies everyday, both in my own way, and loving them how they are loved by their own family. I feel that it’s a great kindness to welcome me into their homes, families, & lives, to love their pets.

What a gift to have a job like this. I cherish the moments and honor the love in each one.

Whatever our job is, whether it’s a paid job, stay at home mom or dad, volunteer job….and not just jobs but with each moment in this life, let’s remember the love, be mindful, intentional, conscious…& honor that love in each breath.πŸ’–

Almost everything we do, no matter how simple or trivial it may seem, whether it’s required of us or not, is helping someone or something, somehow contributing to the world around us being even if just a little bit better. No matter how unimportant a job may seem or how unfulfilling it is to the one working, it is very likely helping something or someone and that is why it exists. Mopping floors, serving food, filing papers, answering phones….are all important in some way to those being served and/or the employers we work for. And even just doing something that helps no one but our own self, sipping coffee/tea, watching a sunset, coloring…be all there and cherish those moments. Let all that we do be done in love! (I think this is a biblical quote or something like it & it deeply resonates with me!) 😍

“Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the small uncaring ways.“

Much love & light to you, always! I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are!

Xoxo Kim