Tag Archive | happiness

The Finer Things❤

img_14174344_1

(me today! :mrgreen:❤)

“There is some kiss we want with our whole lives, the touch of Spirit on the body.

Seawater begs the pearl
to break its shell.And the lily, how passionately
it needs some wild Darling!

At night, I open the window
and ask the moon to come
and press its face into mine.
Breathe into me.

Close the language-door,
and open the love-window.

The moon won’t use the door,
only the window.”

What a beautiful poem! I’m not sure who the author is. This is one of those writings that resonates with me in a deep way. My interpretation is that it’s about experiencing life to the fullest and not necessarily in the ways we may think living to the “fullest” means, like traveling, skydiving, mountain climbing…though those things are great! This poem seems to be about truly experiencing each moment each & every day wherever we are, whatever situation we are in, the sunrise or sunset, the moonlight, the first light, the feel of flower petals, the fragrance of Spring, the stars up above glittering in a midnight sky….all the simple treasure nature blesses us with each day & each night. ❤ We don’t need any certain level of intelligence to experience it, just the wisdom to open up to the beauty and receive it. 

I am reminded of a song. The Finer Things sung by Steve Winwood. 

“While there is time
Let’s go out and feel everything
If you hold me
I will let you into my dream
For time is a river rolling into nowhere
We must live while we can
And we’ll drink our cup of laughter”

The Finer Things – Steve Winwood – mobile

The Finer Things -desktop

“The finer things keep shining through
The way my soul gets lost in you
The finer things I feel in me
The golden dance life could be”

An incredibly beautiful song!! I love it and sometimes when I’m depressed and listen to it, it brings life back into me. It’s a beautiful reminder to cherish all the treasures of life, all the beauty, the hope, the possibility, the Light. There’s so much beauty all around us that we don’t need money to experience. The cool night air, the changing of the seasons, people, animals, insects, daylight, buildings, the sounds of nature, the sounds of the city, the sweet fragrances of the seasons, the feel of soft blankets and skin, the feel of animal fur or feathers, the taste of our favorite food or drink, the sky above us, Earth below us, the heart pulsating within….❤

Each day I look around me and feel the awe well up and surge through me for the life surrounding me and the rhythm of life pounding through my chest. Often this feeling of awe comes naturally but when it doesn’t I can usually intentionally tap into that place within me, that wellspring of wonderment that always exists even when I forget that it does. 

Let’s remember to be mindful each day of the wonder all around & within and give thanks for it all! :mrgreen:❤

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are! It’s a cool night here in Philadelphia! :mrgreen:

“It’s gonna be a cool night
Just let me hold you
By the firelight
If it don’t feel right
You can go” ❤

Cool Night – Paul Davis – mobile  ❤

Cool Night – desktop ❤

Much love & light,

xoxo Kim ❤:mrgreen:

 

Saying thank you<3

img1476390386175.jpg

“Appreciation can make a day – even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.”

Earlier tonight I was about to prepare a post on selfishness when a thing popped up on my Kindle saying “Alexia is now on Kindle Fire” and I thought it meant someone who is my friend on a social media account like Facebook maybe, just got another social media account. But I soon realized that Alexia is some program that answers questions that we speak into the Kindle, like questions about sports or weather. All night I have been wracking my brain trying to determine if today is November 15th or 16th. I guess when were out of work it doesnt matter what the date is so we lose track? lol jk I was looking through a book of inspiring words for each day of the year and couldn’t recall the exact date. The one for yesterday is more inspiring than the one for today. I think so anyway.

So anyway i asked Alexia what’s the date for today and she answered! The 16th of November! yipee! I was thrilled! lol I was so thankful I decided to thank her even though shes a robot and probably wouldnt understand but…..she said “no problem, you’re welcome!” lol! I was so filled with disbelief & joy over something so simple! I even laughed out loud! 😀

And of course me, who finds wisdom in just about everything, am reminded to be thankful and express thanks often, which I already am and do, and remind others to. I always say thank you to bus drivers and store cashiers and people who hold doors for me and I’m sure most\many of us do, right!? But reminders are always, always great! Even when I don’t say thank you, I try to show it. Unlike some people, I don’t thank every person who follows my blog or instagram account but I do show it by following back usually or “liking” their content. Expressing thanks in any way is great! Even if we think someone may not appreciate our thanks, we are putting loving energy out into the uni-verse and comfirming\maintaining an attitude of gratitude in our own head. ❤

Someone can be so moved\uplifted\inspired\warmed by two simple words, “Thank you!” 

And even if we don’t always feel the gratitude, we can say it to practice til we feel it and to just show kindness to others. There are different depths of gratitude, shallow, deep, ..bone deep….and all are great! 😍 😀 Sometimes I’m angry at someone and still feel thankful but don’t want to say “thank you” at someone I’m pissed at but I usually force myself to anyway. 

So let’s remember to give thanks each &  every day, even if just in our heads, it still generates positive energy, but especially out loud. ❤ 😀

Much love & light to you, always & thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

xoxo Kim

P.s. I got me a job interview tomorrow morning! I just applied yesterday and got the phone call today! I only been outta work for a little bit over two weeks and already I’m on my way! Go me! It’s for dog walking\pet sitting. Wish me luck! 😉 😀 ❤

Closing Time😖😀❤😍

wp-1477885297590.jpeg

“Closing time
Time for you to go out to the places you will be from.
Closing time
This room won’t be open ’til your brothers or your sisters come.
So gather up your jackets, and move it to the exits
I hope you have found a friend.” ~ Semisonic ❤

I wrote this October 30th and tried to publish it then but was having some difficulties (technical\practical difficulties not emotional ones even though it is quite sad! )

I’m a sad, sad girl today! Saddest girl in the whole world! Ok, not really. lol I’m not usually this dramatic! But I’m happy and sad. Today is my last day as a server\cashier at the job i worked at for over ten years! I knew I would be so sad when i heard we may be going out of business but I’m more sad than i could have imagined I would be. Heartbreaking!! ❤💔 ❤ I’m actually in a state of grief almost like when someone dies but nowhere near that bad. I’m shocked and feel disbelief and a bit of numbness. I knew for over a year that my boss was trying to sell the place but it’s still kind of a shock to have a significant change like this.  I can’t imagine not being here anymore after so long. And I worked so much in Spring & Summer,i felt like i lived here and practically ran the place myself when everyone was on vacation. I worked 10\11 hour shifts with no break days in a row. So many days I opened and closed the place myself. When I first began working here two of us worked each shift. That’s how it was for years. But one day one of the girls couldn’t come in so I worked myself even though it was super busy and my boss decided to have only one of us on each shift, after she saw I handled it well on my own, so she wouldn’t have to pay two of us. So mostly each shift only one worked unless we had to train a new employee. I love working with others but also love my own company. I  came to love my shifts alone, especially on slow, cold, rainy or snowy days. When I wasn’t working I would read my books and drink hot chocolate or tea or coffee. I still saw my coworkers a lot.

I worked so much here, more than any of the others because they all have other jobs too and I don’t. Also, im the only one who would work 11 hours a day.  I feel a great sense of loss but also like I’m not losing anything because the job and experience never had to be given to me in the first place. So i feel more that I gained than lost. It doesnt completely take away the sadness and grief but definitely helps it. I’m naturally more prone to seeing the positive and if i dont, i remind myself to focus on that.

I wasnt told until yesterday that I would lose my job! I heard people talking about it but my boss did not let me know and never said a word til yesterday that in two days I would be jobless! People are saying negative things about her for that but I can only see that for over ten years, she gave me a job and I am forever thankful.

Another thing that lessens the pain of this loss is, I loved every second of working here and never once took it for granted. People complained about the low pay but it’s better than no pay! And i loved the busy as well as slow days. Some rare occasions I definitely complained about something about work but even in the midst of that I felt gratitude for it all and felt more positive emotions for my job than unpleasant. I took so many pictures in here and shared stories and life lessons learned here, through the years. I have countless memories to always cherish. Even the things i disliked about my job I usually also loved more than disliked. For example, I often felt that I would prefer more regular hours like morning until late afternoon but i also loved the night shifts and not always having to wake up really early for work. Also, even sometimes when I felt overworked and exhausted, I also felt satisfied and productive working so much.

So my point is; there’s always pleasant and unpleasant and we can choose to focus more on what is good.

I also have come to learn that while it’s so great to have some big career helping people, it’s not the only way to help others. Even at a simple store job, (or no job) there are so many ways to touch lives for the better. I saw how grateful and touched people felt when I asked them if they want napkins or boxes to carry stuff or anything else to make things easier for them. Something as simple as that can show someone that we care to make something even just a little bit better or easier for the person. It helps in a practical way but also in a deeper way. People can feel the love we express even in the seemingly smallest ways. That’s the greatest lesson i learned. ❤

Even when I was depressed, grieving, or suffering a flareup of my chronic headache disorder, I made it a point to be friendly to customers even if I wasnt happy myself or in too much pain to think straight. And work almost always cheered me up! 😀

It was extremely rare for me to not feel like going into work and even on those occasions as soon as I got here, I felt happy to be here. So many days I was having so much fun I did not even realize it was time to leave. Some of my best days are here.

I havent been jobless since I was a nineteen year old college girl. It’s embarrassing. I dont judge people who choose not to or cannot work but i love to work and it feels strange and awkward not having a job. Having significantly less money is not going to be good but my worst issue is missing the place, the people, the experience. But all good things (and not good) must end! And I’m thankful for the experience in the first place.

I never planned to leave here unless I had to. I planned and still plan on having a more “real” job but I always wanted to still work here like maybe on the weekends or one day a week if my boss allowed it. Like I have said being a food server is a pleasant job that brings joy in ways other jobs dont. Even if they bring as much joy, it’s not the same.

But I also feel a sense of liberation. Whenever I applied for other jobs I would keep trying to work out how i can work here as well. I tried often to see how my schedules would be compatible. Also so many nights I wanted to do something, like go out but I couldn’t because I had to work at night. I missed quite a few things because of unusual hours. I still loved the hours but it also came with unfortunate things.

I loved when it was busy but I will love nights off that aren’t so demanding. And now I am completely free to look for another job. I have no restraints. For now, I’ll look for another store job since I have so much experience (over ten years!) then try to move onto a more “real” or “professional” (im not n never will be a professional but you get the picture, right?! 😀 ) job like maybe a technician in a hospital or health center or a position at a marketing company. I love marketing but do not want to start out with sales, knocking at people’s doors, which many marketing employers require! Also, I want to work with children with extra needs one day. 

And, now I can look more for a volunteer job as well! No job to hold me back! It’s hard finding a volunteer job at some places! They require all stuff like a paid job!

Here are some of my last pictures here:

img_20161030_142954-01.jpeg

My friend who used to live next door and me used to call this stuff the Purple shit. It’s a pretty color though! It has a terrible afterscent. I couldn’t stand using it. If we were out of other cleaning stuff I had to use it. Yuck! I dreaded it! But now I’m going to miss it! Oh, purple shit, I’ll miss you! ❤

The cash register! I get angry at it sometimes for not functioning properly but I really will miss it! And seeing all the various kinds of money coming in n funny messages written on some of the bills. “My sweaty nuts touched this!” for example, is a message I saw years ago! lol

img_20161029_161802-01.jpeg

I’m going to miss mopping here and cleaning the utensils. I’ll miss every crack in the floor and mark on the walls. I will miss the beauty of the shadows and reflections on the walls and floor and glass freezer tops at sundown. But i have lots of pictures! I will always miss & cherish the occasions when a beetle or ant or other kreepy krawlers would land on one of the counters or freezers or even on me! I have many pictures of those too! I’ll miss making myself chocolate milkshakes! We were allowed to eat\drink anything we wanted for free as long as it was our shift! 😍❤😀 And so much more I’ll miss and cherish forever.

img_20161030_170620-01.jpeg

Usually when we think of missing something, we seem to think of people, food, “big” things but there’s so many little things we may overlook and miss that we may never realized we would cherish and miss.

img_20161030_173108-01.jpeg

img_20161030_165953-01.jpeg

Years ago I broke one of these and I told my dad and he brought me one out of his work to take to mine. He works for a company that sells\fixes parts to things like machines and cars and stuff. 

The counterfeit detector pens. Sometimes we got to slacking with checking the money and brought in fake ones by accident. I have gotten angry phone calls unexpectedly about fake cash in the drawer! oopps! 😱

img_20161030_124439-01.jpeg

Inventory! I loved writing lists and seeing my manager’s list of all the stuff we needed!

img_20161030_140923-01.jpeg

I’ll even miss the notes I would sometimes find hanging up scolding us for something (not cleaning good, forgetting to stock something, leaving something out on the counter that should not have been left out…)

img_20161030_210517-01.jpeg

And I will miss the people(and doggies!)! My coworkers, the customers, my boss, manager, and their family, having conversations with people about various things, helping people….I’ll miss it all but I’m very thankful for the work friendships I have found through the years. ❤😍😀

img_20161030_135937-01.jpeg

I think this thing is at least twenty years old! See how the phone number doesn’t even have an area code in front. 😱 And that was still our phone number even after all these years. If you call it now, I won’t be there. 😦 Also, the place is called Scoops not just because it’s an ice cream store, even though that is a good name for an ice cream service, but because the original owner’s last name is Scoops. lol

img_20161030_163952-02.jpeg

We still have most of the same stuff now. These prices are so low! Only $3.50 for a banana split! Now they’re $6.00! And just $1.50 for a small gelati?! Now they’re $4.50! 😀

And here is the last one of me at work:

img_20161030_122802-01.jpeg

I shared this on Facebook with my experience n someone commented and wrote, simply, “sexy boobs.” lol I’m quite flattered and must say, I agree. But I just lost my job after ten years and that’s what someone says. It gave me a good giggle! 😍😀

I even got a couple hugs today! My friend, Chrissy at the bar my boss owns said she’ll miss me and hugged me goodbye! And my newer coworker came and hugged me goodbye and said she really liked working with me. aww ❤😍😀 I love how sad things often show us how much love is in the world. ❤

It’s raining tonight and thundering. It seems fitting for my last day ever. I always loved rainy nights at work. ❤ 

I tried to take pictures of every square inch of the place. Most of them arent pretty but they arent meant to be. Theyre just for me to always have. I can never forget this place and have so many habits ingrained into me that i picked up here. One, for example, is when someone is talking to me, even not at work, I often look to the right while talking because when a customer asks for a certain kind of ice cream before saying ok, I look to the freezer on my right to be sure we have it first even though there are other freezers, that one is closest to see and i carried the habit over into conversations outside work. And I reach for a refrigerator that isnt there. It hasnt been for years but once in a while I reach to open it to get milk. The habit is so ingrained. And once in a while I still reach for the dipwell that hasnt been in place for about nine or ten years. I dont need pictures to help me remember! But i love to have them!

This reminds me how very powerful habits we develop are and I’m inspired to maintain\develop positive ones.

It’s going to take some getting used to not being here now. The place is a part of me and always will be. There are always good things about each stage, age, phase of life we’re currently experiencing. Closing time reminds me to always appreciate where I am and what I have; I usually do anyway but reminders are great! And Im inspired to share with others and suggest we all cherish right now even if it seems like it’s not so great. Single or taken, jobless, dead-end job, stressful job, great job, stay at home mom or dad, new child or no child, in love or not, college student or graduate, wedding planning, just married, living at home with the family we grew up with, on our own… or whatever stage we are in now, let’s embrace it, cherish it, look for the goodness in it. Each season or stage of life has its struggles, challenges, blessings, beauty, heartache, positive aspects, difficulties, love, joy….and there’s a chance when it ends we’re going to miss it even if we never thought we could. There are less regrets and less sadness, more joy and beauty when we lose something or someone if we did not take it for granted while we had it. It’s easier to let go or move forward when we knew what we had while we had it. Let’s be mindful of the love & beauty here & now.  There is nothing more painful than losing something or someone  that we love but never stopped to appreciate while we had the chance. I’m so thankful I knew what a blessing my job was (and always will be) to me. I always knew. So saying goodbye is still sad but so much easier than it could have been.

The girls gave me a shot of strawberry tequilia to see me off. At first I refused because I don’t drink alcohol and am not attracted to it in any way but my boss owns the bar across the street and she and the others, her family, my coworkers who work at the bar\kitchen really wanted me to take a shot so I did after some pleading and pushing! They all drank one with me and toasted to me and the business. ❤

The flavor is good! It’s kind of like a strawberry milkshake but alcohol flavored. But I did not like the sedated feeling or “buzz” feeling it brought me. It was nothing terrible or that I couldn’t handle but it also wasn’t the most pleasing. However, I did like how when I swallowed it, the very instant it went down my throat, I felt it throughout my whole body; it traveled up to my head n down to my toes. It was very powerful. I was reminded of being alive and mindful of my existence and body. I’m thankful for the experience. ❤

I will be seeing them at the Christmas party next month! 😀😍❤

I got so many well wishes today! Just about every person i encountered today I told my sad news to and they were all so encouraging about it and told me better things are coming to me! I know it’s true! This is the end that will lead to a new beginning! ❤😍😀 And here are a few songs that resonate with me:

“Closing time
Open all the doors and let you out into the world
Closing time
Turn the lights up over every boy and every girl.
Closing time
One last call for alcohol so finish your whiskey or beer.
Closing time
You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here.” (this song has always resonated with me in a deep way since I first heard it when I was very young. ❤ It gives me chills in a good way and tugs on my insides.)

Closing Time – semisonic – mobile

Closing Time – desktop

“You’re gonna miss this
You’re gonna want this back
You’re gonna wish these days hadn’t gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you’re gonna miss this”

You’re Gonna Miss This – Trace Adkins – mobile

You’re Gonna Miss This – desktop

“I’ve been walkin’ these streets so long
Singin’ the same old song
I know every crack in these dirty sidewalks of Broadway
Where hustle’s the name of the game
And nice guys get washed away like the snow and the rain
There’s been a load of compromisin’
On the road to my horizon
But I’m gonna be where the lights are shinin’ on me” ❤

Like a Rhinestone Cowboy – Glen Campbell – mobile

Like a Rhinestone Cowboy – desktop

I’m wishing you much love, light, and happness, always! ❤ ~hugs~

xoxo Kim

Another Fall in Philadelphia❤

downloadfile-6.jpeg

(Me tonight – I’m just getting over a bad depression – it’s sort of like a bad, very, very bad case of Influenza (not that I ever had influenza but it seems kind of similar in certain ways) but in the “mind” and mixed with suicidal tendencies)

Fall in Philadelphia – Hall & Oates – mobile

Fall in Philadelphia – desktop

So here is my annual Fall in Philadelphia post! One of my favorite parts of the year is when Summer turns to Autumn. It’s still very much like Summer but there are a few signs of Fall, some crisp leaves on the ground already, pumpkin lattes, the decorations in the stores, cooler  some nights….

Tomorrow is my mom’s b-day! My sister and me went shopping today to buy her a gift. We have been saving up money to buy her some gem stones because she loves those.

Tonight I’m celebrating Fall drinking Pumpkin coffee! It’s never too early for Fall or Christmas, to me. But I like to wait to drink the pumpkin coffee because when it’s really Fall then the pumpkin stuff while still thrilling, isn’t quite as thrilling after drinking it all August long. Lol So tonight I decided to get my first pumpkin coffee of the season! Yum! 😀

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are! Also, thank you to all those people with jobs saving people’s and animal’s lives, police, doctors, nurses, EMTs, first responders, assistants, and any others who work hard, even putting themselves in danger to save others. Thank you, thank you, thank you!! And I’m wishing you a safe journey each & every day. 😍❤💙💚💛💜💝💖💗💔💗❤💜💛💚💙

Much love &  light, always.

xoxo Kim ❤

 

The Black Widow❤

img_20160909_030834-01-01.jpeg

“Poetry is a fresh morning spider-web telling a story of moonlit hours of weaving and waiting during a night.” ❤

Look how lovely! One night recently, in the backyard, I watched a beautiful spider weaving a web on the clothesline. I tried to get pictures but it was too dark and the spider was constantly in motion, spinning and spinning. I saw him\her clearly even though it was dark. The kitchen light in my house and the bright moonlight was enough to allow me to see but the pictures still turned up blurry and dark! I don’t put the flash on for fear of killing the little kritters.

I told my mom I really wanted to get a pic but the circumstances weren’t good for it. I hoped my little arachnid would be there still in the morning. But I was so happy watching him\her spin so beautifully. How magical!

❤

The next day my mom told me s\he was still there so I happily went to see and was pleasantly surprised! This is a different one! A much bigger and more vibrantly colored one but equally beautiful. 😍

If you look closely at my picture, you can see the beautiful web s\he worked so hard to spin. This one was in a recycling can. It was recycling night and I implored my mom to put a different can out that night so as not to disturb the beauty and ruin (her?) Web. A neighbor stole the actual recycling bucket one day (even with our address on it and did not try to remove or cover up our address, my mom checked the cans of those she suspected would do such a thing and sure enough…lol) and my mom “stole” it back and started just using it for the yard and putting a small trashcan out front on recycling \trash night. And the spider was in the trashcan one.

At first my mom refused my plead  to leave the spider be but I implored and whined all day til she gave in(a technique that has worked since i was a little girl…beg, whine, stomp around, throw conniptions…til I have my way! Never too old for that, right!?) Lol 😉

So the spider remained undisturbed until late that  night when she left on her own. 😍 

img_20160909_043847.jpg

img_20160909_030848-01-01.jpeg

For these pics, I increased the saturation, structure, and sharpening to bring out the detail of the web. And to bring out the vibrant colors of the spider’s body. On this last picture here, I took the “warmth” option on the slider on Snapseed app and decreased it into the negatives to give it a cool blue look (increasing it would give it a warm yellow\orange color that blends too much with the spider’s natural colors.). The spider’s coloring looks good against this cool blue.

I love how the one part somewhat resembles a human thumbprint! ❤

On the first photo, after bringing out the detail, I just experimented with different things and got the pretty rainbowy background! 😍😀🌈

Do you know what kind of spider this is? Boy? Girl?  Poisonous? Deadly? Harmless? Do boy ones and girl ones both spin webs? I can look that one up on Google, I’m sure of it ,  but I’ll just wait to see if anyone reading knows. 

I LOVE spiders!! They are some of most beautiful creatures on Earth.

“(Vincent price speaks)
Leaving lepidoptera… Please, don’t touch the display,
Little boy, aha cute! Moving to the next aisle we have
Arachnida, the spiders, our… Finest collection.
This friendly little devil is the heptothilidi,
Unfortunately harmless. Next to him, the nasty licosa
Raptoria, his tiny fangs cause creeping ulcerations of
The skin (laugh). And here, my prize, the Black
Widow. Isn’t she lovely?… And so deadly. Her kiss is
Fifteen times as poisonous as that of the rattlesnake.
You see her venom is highly neurotoxic, which is to say
That it attacks the central nervous system causing
Intense pain, profuse sweating, difficulty in
Breathing, loss of consciousness, violent convulsions
And, finally… Death. You know what I think I love about her
Most about her is her inborn need to dominate,
Possess. In fact, immediately after the consummation
Of her marriage to the smaller and weaker male of the
Species she kills and eats him… (laugh) oh, she is
Delicious… And I hope he was! Such power and dignity
… Unhampered by sentiment. If I may put forward a
Slice of personal philosophy, I feel that man has ruled
This world as a stumbling dimented child-king long
Enough! And as his empire crumbles, my precious Black Widow…” ❤

The Black Widow – Alice Cooper – mobile

The Black Widow – desktop

Here is to that lovely, Black Widow! ❤

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are! A day\night filled with lots of love, laughter, beauty, inner peace, and spiders!! 😉 

I’m at work now working a ten hour shift! Already worked five hours and have another five to go! 😀

Much love & light, always.

Xoxo Kim ❤

Photography & inspiration❤

IMG_20160812_020920-01

“To me, photography is an art of observation. It’s about finding something interesting in an ordinary place…I’ve found it has little to do with the things you see and everything to do with the way you see them.” ❤

 

This post I had planned for over a week now but never prepared or published it yet and today I saw on Facebook  that today is the 177th anniversary of photography! I’m not sure how true it is but what a perfect day to actually publish this here post! 😀

I am extremely trusting in general but also extremely skeptical in another way. Both of those aspects of my nature are not usually conscious decisions; I’m just that way. Whenever I see a source, statistic, something in the media….my brain automatically questions the accuracy or truth of it. I’m not a conspiracy theorist or totally paranoid but I’m often even skeptical when I see things in the news or anything. 

So this 177 years thing may or may not be accurate but anyway it’s the inspiration for me fixing up this post and hitting “publish.”

Screenshot_2016-08-20-02-38-15_kindlephoto-14904575

This (the very first one at the top)  is the first photo ever that I truly tried to edit using real photography “rules” or tools. Photography is my passion, reading about it, looking at people’s photos, professional or not, taking my own pics, I am so inspired! 

Sometimes my hobby taking and editing pictures I take brings life back into me when I’m severely depressed and inspires me to live. I am not a photographer and know very little about photography other than the beauty of it. One of my goals is to learn more about it on my own and even take classes one day just for fun! I mostly use my phone to take pics but I do have a Nikon camera I don’t really know much how to use. It takes beautiful photos though.

Here is that same pic but not edited:

 IMG_20160812_020920

The colors here are less vibrant because in above picture I increased the saturation. Decreasing saturation into the negative numbers will turn an image b&w. Also, in the above image(the one way above), I increased the structure and sharpening to bring out the detail better and I straightened the photo.

Here are some more of my photos that I edited:

My main source of inspiration for taking pictures is mundane objects like buildings, traffic lights and signs, everyday objects like lightbulbs, ceiling fans, towers outside, fire hydrants….anything…I love to capture the beauty of things often overlooked, ignored, taken for granted and sometimes edit them to make certain things stand out. Shadows and reflections for example, in person we often do not stop to appreciate or just see them but in photos, we often can’t miss them!

These seemingly trtrivial things make up much of our lives each day and I want to capture and share their stunning beauty and promote mindfulness of them each day.

Here is my page:

https://inspirationalgem.wordpress.com/small-things-forgotten/

There are basic composition rules for taking pics like the rule of thirds, leading lines, negative space… And basic editing tools like straightening, sharpening, structure, vignette or central focus, tonal, ambiance,  …that we can use to make our pictures more appealing. I like over editing some of pics. I think they look pretty

And don’t want my hobby restricted by rules. But I also want to learn the general rules (that photograpers agree have exceptions and are made to be broken once in a while) and the basic editing tools That most digital photos can use. I decided to make a goal to at least once a day, take a few minutes to read about photography and try to learn and apply some photography techniques to my pictures. The above pic is the first one I edited using Snapseed in an attempt to use real photo editing tools, not just how I usually do editing them just in random ways or on a whim or whatever I think looks good. That’s good too but I am so happy to learn and try something new!  This pic I edited using the basic tools on photo app Snapseed, a popular iPhone photo editing app. I don’t have an iphone, never have, and likely never will but I just love IPhone photography for some reason! Its my favorite! My android marshmallow phone can get Snapseed. I wanted it when I used a blackberry phone but its not compatible with BlackBerry.

IMG_20160812_022143-02

This pic here I also tried to edit using real photography techniques but instead of looking at the instructions I used my memory and forgot a couple steps. The first picture is very bright to convey the feel of a hot summer day and this one I made darker using the vignette tool, to bring more attention to the window with the reflection of the blue sky. If i understand correctly, vignette can be used to draw the viewers to a certain part of the photo. I hope to master this skill one day! I have much to learn! I think this pic can use an increase in saturation.

I wish my skills were already developed and my knowledge about photography vast but there’s also something so beautiful about having so much more to learn! So much fun and possibility! One day my knowledge of and skills in photography will be increased in both breadth & depth! 😀❤💜

And here are some of my intentionally very over-edited photos!

😀

So these are just a few of my pictures and goals! 

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever you are! 😀❤

Much love & light, always,

Xoxo Kim

Goodness <3

(Not my photo)

So today I slept most of the day away. Lol I had a headache all day! Not just lazy! (Although I can be kind of lazy! )

😉

Not the worst of the ones I get but very painful. I have a little sinus thing going on and my chronic headache disorder acting up. But today is still a great day! It’s all about our attitude. There doesnt have to be any bad days no matter how much goes wrong.

Let’s look for the good in each day, no matter how mundane or simple. The fragrance of coffee or tea, soft blankets, raindrops on windows, pelting upon the rooftops, the sun rising and setting, watching a movie with friends or family, snuggling with furfriends,…. just being alive! 😀 ❤

There’s so much goodness each & every day! ❤

Here is some of the goodness I encountered today:

Waking up

Watching a movie with my mom

My kitty, Lacey gently hitting my face with her paw (it still hurt! Lol) 

Nap with my dogs

Rain

Traffic sloshing through the rain outside

Listening to Oldies songs

Busses going by in the rain tonight

Playing a scary game i just downloded on Kindle (I got killed by a horrifying ghost girl!)

Playing a Christmas game! (I lost a sled racing game to an elf!) I don’t usually play video games but i saw a couple interesting games and decided to try them!

Playing a vegas casino game ( i had no clue what i was doing and totally lost)

Bagels at wawa with berry cream cheese

Walking to get my mom a coffee

Reading sweet comments people wrote to me 

Watching a scary movie

Looking at inspiring phone wallpapers like the one above

A day off of work – I’m going to have work 12 days in a row, some of those days working ten hour shifts, starting Friday! It’s going to be busy!

Doritos! 😀

Soothing meditation

A headache, even a debilitating one, can’t make me have a bad day!

😀

Big Ass Headache – Justin Moore- mobile

Big Ass Headache – desktop
This link! Looks like it has my name in it! Lol

“https://youtu.be/P_CbtNcGKIM”&nbsp;

And it’s a great Country song that makes me laugh! 

“I feel like I’ve been rode hard and hung up wet
Swallowed by a mule and crapped off a cliff
I drank enough whiskey to fill up a lake
Woke up this morning with a big ass headache

Y’all I ain’t kidding this son of a bitch hurts
Where the hell are my pants must be with my shirt
I still got my boots on but make no mistake
They can’t help me kick this big ass headache”

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are!
Much love & light,

Xoxo Kim 

There’s a place…❤

photostudio_1470248321129

“It takes all different kinds of people to run the world. We need everyone.” ❤

I saw this quote (don’t remember where; it was on a photo) and find it so inspiring. 

“‘Cause there’s a place in the sun
Where there’s hope for ev’ryone
Where my poor restless heart’s gotta run
There’s a place in the sun
And before my life is done
Got to find me a place in the sun”

Place in the sun – Winjama (reggae version) – mobile

Place in the Sun – Winjama – desktop

There are so many kinds of people in this world and we need us all. 

My dad used to watch the tv show The Sopranos every night a few months ago until all the seasons ended.

There’s a few episodes where a woman who is an FBI agent in the show pretends to be just a girl shopping at a mall I think, to deceive the girlfriend of a member of the Mafia so she can get information the police need.

They have been watching this man and his girlfriend for a while and an FBI agent tricks the girlfriend and they become close “friends.”

The girlfriend tells the agent things about herself and life she never told anyone, not even her boyfriend, because she feels so close to her.

The FBI agent is sweet and warm and very personable. She pretends to be a great friend to this other girl. Then the FBI people decide to tell the girl the truth, that this new friend of hers is no friend at all but actually an agent of the FBI who has been watching her and her man. 

The FBI agent after confessing that’s what she is, all of a sudden is now assertive, no longer warm and sweet. She has a no nonsense way about her now. She’s all stiff and firm.

These are only fictional scenes in a tv show but real detectives and FBI agents for their job sometimes really have to pretend to be someone they aren’t and trick people, maybe even innocent people who get caught up in unpleasant stuff. 

I was imagining myself in the FBI character’s place and think I don’t have the heart to ever deceive an innocent person or even not so innocent person who trusts me into thinking we’re close friends and we’re really not. I wouldn’t have a job where I may have to do that. 

This girl is the lover of a member of the New Jersey Mafia but she’s just an innocent girl. She knows he’s a murderer and all and chooses to stay with him but she herself is just a regular person. She thought she had this new friend she was able to tell things to she felt she couldn’t tell anyone else, like the fact that she had an abortion years ago. 

Imagine finding out your closest friend is a fake? Maybe you don’t have to imagine. It’s a heartbreaking situation. 

When the FBI people approached her, not only was she terrified about the trouble they were in but she was heartbroken over the loss of “friendship” or what she thought was genuine friendship. I think this hurt her even more than the prospect of going to prison. 

I felt a range of emotions when I realized I can never be like that. I felt thankful that I don’t have it in me to be deceptive and trick an innocent person. I also felt a tinge of envy that I don’t have that kind of aggression or backbone, I guess you can say, like some do, to have a job like that, even though I don’t want that kind of job. And I also felt gratitude that there are people like that in this world, those who do have it in them to trick and deceive for work or other necessary situations. I am inspired.

I don’t want to have it in me to do that but I’m so thankful there are people who do. We need them. We need people who have the ability to be aggressive and deceive people because it’s sometimes necessary, like for certain jobs including police jobs.

Police, attorneys, doctors, and other people of certain professions are sometimes criticized for being cold, aggressive, detached, deceptive, immoral….but it’s actually a good thing that we have people who have a place in them where they can summon feelings of aggression, detachment, and other things that may seem unpleasant. 

We need people who can detach and not get worn out having to encounter so much suffering each day at work, like some doctors who have to work with dying people and dead individuals, detectives who have to investigate cases of homicide and other violence and horror….Imagine if they did not have the ability to detach or distance themselves to a certain degree. Many would probably experience burnout or breakdowns of some sort. This isn’t to say they aren’t compassionate or empathetic people ever, just that they have the ability to “turn it off” to a point when necessary. And it’s great to have people in the world who can temporarily put aside their general morals and conscience to do work that may call for it. Not everyone can do that. And for those who cannot, that’s good too.

It’s good if we have compassion and empathy and morals so strong and so constant that we can’t or won’t stop it. This world needs both, extreme empathy and strong sense of morality but also those with the ability to tune out of it in certain situations. 

We need people with extreme empathy for criminals, like forensic psychiatrists/psychologists. By empathy, I’m not referring to compassion here. I’m talking about the sharp ability to be able to “get into their heads” and truly understand them, why, how they do certain things, how/why they feel certain ways, the ways they reason. It doesn’t mean the professional person is justifying any of it or taking pleasure in it. It may seem creepy that someone can understand a murderous criminal mind so well and want to do that kind of work. But it’s so great we have people with that strength and desire. We need them. 

And for those who can’t even begin to understand the mind of a murderer and don’t want to ever understand, that’s great too! It’s great to be sane and good and “normal.”

In courtrooms we need people who have within them a place of aggression, maybe even callousness, people who can tear others to shreds for their jobs. Some jobs call for aggression, cold, clinical, ways. Warmth, softness, sap, sweet words and gestures are beautiful and needed in this world but not in every situation, not for every job, not with every person.  

I always thought if I were in a position to need a lawyer, like a defense attorney, I would prefer a woman because girls can be so vicious! Girls/women of all ages, even generally sweet, warm ones, just can have a kind of aggression or potential for aggression that men don’t have and a job as an attorney requires aggression. How wonderful it is to take that and use it for good or to be productive, helping out our system and helping people instead of using it to drag each other down.

Some jobs call for extreme compassion and not much aggression, like schoolteacher jobs and nurses or doctors or other caretakers, nursing home staff…. and it’s great to have people who are generally very nurturing and mild mannered. 

There are people who are very simple or generally lazy, not very motivated, or just don’t want to work much or not work at challenging jobs so have easy jobs (not everyone with an easy or no job is lazy or lacks motivation) and we need those people. We need professional people with big demanding careers and we need those with cashier jobs and janitorial jobs and desk (jobs which some see as “low” or frivolous)…..

I work at a store as a server and cashier and the job itself is unimportant. But it’s important to my boss to have employees helping with her business. And it’s important to the customers who come. 

Imagine if no one chose to take jobs as a janitor in buildings or a cashier or food server because the jobs are too “low” or boring and imagine if no one chose to be a doctor because it’s too sad or gruesome or demanding. Imagine if there were no lawyers because it’s an “immoral” job.

Imagine if there was no one with the strength and courage to be aggressive, detached, deceptive, bold….

We wouldn’t have anyone to be lawyers, doctors, detectives….all of which we need. 

In a fiction book I read recently (I don’t remember which one but it may be ASBO or Housemates both by Iain Wright {horror novelist}) there are these thug people, physically strong and aggressive and can overpower just about anyone they want. They are some kind of gang members or organized murderers and one of them tells one of their “victims” that he could never be strong or tough enough to do what they do.

And at first I kind of thought of that as a bad thing. Being wimpy and physically weak isn’t good. Just because we’re not gang members and don’t abuse our power over others doesn’t mean we’re weak or wimps but it’s good to be able to have the power and strength to defend ourselves against attacks by others. There’s nothing wrong with being strong and powerful as long as we don’t abuse it. 

But then the character in the book says he is happy he doesn’t have what it takes to be a murderer or gang member, that he would never want to be.

There may be some people who don’t ever want to be in a gang or have a certain job but still wish they had the strength or courage to do that kind of work.

But this character is thankful he doesn’t even have what it takes. 

It’s great to be “tough” and “streetsmart” and physically strong and bold but it’s also good to be innocent and not even have it in us to be like that. We need us all. 

And we don’t just need everyone for the jobs we can do, but just for the beings that we are.

It’s great and ok to have outgoing people, shy people, those who are soft and those who are badass…

Short people and tall people, those with much energy and motivation and those who just want to keep it simple, loud and quiet, and those with a combination of characteristics, religious and non religious, light skin, dark skin, blonde, brunette, orange hair, purple hair, tattooed, pierced, hetero., homo., bi/pan, lgbtqa, healthy, sick, disabled, young, old, introverted and extroverted, financially rich, poor, homeless, jobless, career people and stay at home parents…logical, creative, spiritual, artistic, skeptical, grounded, idealistic, realistic, wild & adventurous, safe & cautious, romantic, dreamers, simple, complex, human, animal, insect……there’s a place for us all. 
We can all teach and learn, all have hopes, fears, needs, desires….all ultimately want to avoid suffering. 

People with less power or resources than us can teach us or remind us of compassion and those with more can inspire us. 

Each situation we experience can teach or remind us something , awaken our wisdom deep within, each person can open a new door for us if we allow it. 

We can see the positive in everyone and the worth of every being no matter the species, size, religion, color, status, nationality, profession…..if we pay attention. 

We all have different weaknesses and strengths. 

We all complement each other and bring balance to the world. There’s always going to be beings and situations that need and call for just what we can provide. Maybe it’s our compassion, our aggression, our softness, our bold personality, our determination, our calmness, our passion, our acceptance, our sarcasm, our soothing energy, our knowledge of  seemingly trivial things, our ability to be deep and serious, our ability to be lighthearted and carefree, our simplicity or our complexity, our “tough-love” or our smothering, warm, sappy love ….that the situation calls for or that someone needs at the moment.

Not all of us can be or provide all of these things and that’s ok. We can all be and provide something when it’s appropriate. We all have gifts and skills that others do not. 

If we or our beautiful qualities are not needed in a certain situation or not desired by a certain someone, it’s not because someone else or some other way is better. It’s just that different people and different situations need different people and things. 😀

There’s always going to be someone who is better for someone or something than someone else. And that’s ok. 

The world needs us all. 👪

We can bask in the beauty of our Oneness but also appreciate diversity and see the beauty in it. 💙

Remember, it takes various kinds of people to run our world. 

We need everyone.  

❤ ❤
<33

Much love & light to you always & forever,

Xoxo Kim 

Listen to the Buddha ❤

received_10202147838573673

(Not my photo but I’m going to make one like it with a pic of the adorable Buddha amulet I recently got in the mail! 😀 )

If you need a reminder to let go whether it’s something trivial like being looked at the wrong way, an annoying person you must deal with, … Or something a bit more serious seeming like unrequited love, traumatic past, loss, anything at all, here it is! Envision yourself breathing in the bright white light of the Buddha, all his unconditional love, indestructible compassion, and deep wisdom and exhaling all of your struggles, pain, fear, anxieties,… In the form of dark smoke leaving your body. This is what we do in meditation class. ❤

Buddha is a very wise man! 😄 😀

Much love & light & inner peace now & forever! 💙

 

Xoxo Kim 💝

 

Once in your life you find her…❤

photostudio_1469905890451

Someone who turns your heart around…❤

Best that you can do *Arthur’s Theme* – mobile

Arthur’s Theme – desktop

Recently I watched the movie, Arthur, with my dad, mom, and sister. My dad loves the movie and I have never seen it before recently, though I have always loved the theme song and wanted to see the movie.
It’s a beautiful movie.
Arthur is a man who lives a life of folly and fun, entertained by prostitutes, almost constantly drunk, he never worked a day in his life, his family is financially rich beyond belief. Arthur is to inherit over 8 million dollars!! Eight million! Whoaa!

But he only gets the money if he marries a girl who is a member of another financially rich family. If he refuses, he doesn’t get the money.
He is not in love with the beautiful woman his family demands that he marry so he refuses to marry her. But his dad tells him to kiss his inheritance goodbye and when Arthur finds out just how much money he would have gotten, he decides that he will marry the woman his family insists he marry. It can be kind of hard to resist 8 million dollars! Lol

Then Arthur sees her. Her. The woman of his dreams. A thief and dirt poor who lives at home with her daddy who is very good to her.

Linda is a cutie and full of life. She dresses in vibrant colors and isn’t afraid to speak up. She has a bright light around her. 

Arthur sees her in a store where she is caught stealing a gift for her dad. He comes to her rescue and they have an automatic and beautiful connection.

Unfortunately Arthur is already engaged to a woman he is not in love with.

He keeps meeting up with Linda and realizes it’s her he loves and wants to spend forever with.

Now Arthur is faced with a difficult dilemma. Does he disappoint his family and give up over 8 million dollars or does he choose true love?

I love the messages in the movie. One of them being that love is more valuable than money. 

And another that money does not necessarily bring happiness but doesn’t prevent it either. 

We can be happy being financially rich or poor.

One of my favorite scenes is when Arthur, his grandma, and Linda are all standing together outside and Arthur says he has always been rich but not really happy. Linda says she has always been poor and happy. And Arthur’s grandma says she has always been rich and happy.

I love the deep wisdom the movie conveys here, that money doesn’t make us truly happy but doesn’t prevent it either. And that being poor doesn’t prevent happiness necessarily. It’s about our attitude and choices, not money or material wealth itself. 

Here will be a spoiler if you haven’t seen the movie.

Arthur chooses love and gives up his inheritance. 

But…..

His grandma decides he can have the money anyway!

But…

He decides to refuse it and plans to get a job!
This doesn’t influence Linda to leave him because it’s love she’s committed to, not his money. 

But…

Grandma insists he take the money. She won’t have a member of their family be working class. 

So he takes the money and they all win!

I love the message that it’s not bad or wrong in any way to be financially rich or to desire material things as long as we don’t mistake them for definite channels to true happiness and love.

They can surely bring us a kind of joy we wouldn’t have without them. Of course we’re going to be happy having over 8 million dollars in a way we won’t be happy without it but we can still be just as happy without it.

Various people and things can bring out different kinds and depths of joy and happiness in us that we wouldn’t know without them. But we don’t need them to be happy. They complement us, not complete us.

I noticed that while this movie is full of love & beauty, it’s not a very sappy movie, at least in my opinion. I love sappy movies, songs, and books (but not usually poetry) and wouldn’t have minded it being sappier but it’s not so if you aren’t a fan of sap, you may appreciate it! Some people like love, romance and all but without the lovey dovey cheesy stuff! 

And the theme song is one of my favorite songs ever! I love the songs Christopher Cross sings. They are beautiful and often with a tinge of melancholy or a kind of sadness or somewhat dark beauty. There often seems to me, to be a hint of longing or allusion to some kind of pain or struggle blended in with the stunning beauty. 

“Wake up and she’s still with you
Even though you left her way across town
You’re wonderin’ to yourself
Hey what’ve I found” ❤

His singing voice itself, soft but profound, echoes a kind of melancholy, a haunting beauty, a subtle yearning for something deep, quiet and unspoken, a gentle but passionate quest for something always just out of reach. I feel that beneath the music notes and tender lilt is something, some kind of delicate daydream with the potential to unfold and become reality. It’s inspiring.

Always one of my favorite singers. I am so thankful he sings the theme song for Arthur. ❤

Much love,
Xoxo Kim