Anybody can beat anybody on any given day

This is an old post of mine but WordPress just recommended it with the post I just posted tonight and I like the lessons here so I’m reblogging my own post! It’s nearly two years old but the wisdom is timeless. 😀 ❤

inspirationalgem's avatarA Dose of Inspiration

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I recently read a novel by Morton Reed called, “Proof of Innocence,” which is a legal suspense thriller. It takes place in California, U.S.A. In the early 90’s and is about a young boy who is accused of attempting to kill his severely abusive father while his father was in bed sleeping.

While I found this book to be very enjoyable in various ways, I probably wouldn’t recommend it to anyone as it depicts horrific violence in graphic detail.

Serious domestic violence /abuse, extreme child & spousal abuse, horrific sexual violence.

At some points I wanted to put the book down and quit reading .

Some parts are deeply disturbing.

I have experienced domestic abuse and while it’s not nearly as bad as the abuse carried out by the character in the book, I can still relate in so many ways, especially to the emotional abuse, extreme anger outbursts, horrific…

View original post 918 more words

In Love With Nowhere <3

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I read a fiction book called “In Love With Nowhere.” I loved the name as soon as I read it. I automatically interpreted as something positive like we can be in love with “nowhere” like either being physically “in the middle of nowhere” or loving each stage of life even if it seems to be going nowhere.

The book is about a man who is 30 something years old and struggling with severe substance addiction. He is a popular writer of horror fiction books and is well loved by many fans, but his addiction gets the best of him and his career, his marriage, and his whole life are suffering. 

So his agent sets up a place in the woods, a cozy cabin, for him to stay alone for a while to get better. He’ll have no contact with the outside world, other than walks through the woods and the kritters there,  and no access to drugs except smaller and smaller doses of Valium until he’s off it completely. He has to write a blog post each day to let the world know how he is doing and what he’s up to but he has no contact with readers.

Shortly after he gets to the cabin, very strange things begin happening. He’s not sure what’s real and what are hallucinations and delusions. He suffers immensely, both physically and emotionally. He experiences depression and serious physical opiate withdrawal symptoms.  He is plagued with nightmares and terrible visions. 

It’s a psychological thriller and a horror fiction book but runs deeper than just thriller and mystery. There are little life lessons and reminders throughout the book.

Also it helps deepen our empathy for those struggling with addiction. Some scenes are gutwrenching. The author really goes into detail about the physical and emotional torment that people with addiction experience. 

The book is also full of hope and inspiration.

There are little reminders to cherish the beauty all around us. To be mindful of nature and the people we see everywhere we go.

It also reminds us to take comfort in the simple pleasures, when we are sick and in pain, hot tea, a hot shower, a comfortable bed, a cool breeze, just focus on each little thing and allow it to distract us so we don’t have to focus too much on the pain or sickness we are experiencing. It’s ok to find sweet little escapes to help us cope and bring some sense of consolation no matter how small.

Also it reminds us to let go of our painful past, not to be haunted by mistakes we have made and horrific things that happened to us. Acknowledge that they happened, never repress them, but just let them go. They can’t be changed and letting them imprison us does no good to anyone. 

The book also conveys the message that as long as we’re alive, there’s always hope no matter how terrible our life seems now.

Also, it reminds us to smile big like a “simpleton!” lol! A couple occasions the man smiles a big goofy grin like a “simpleton,” The author calls it! My grandmom often called me a simpleton when I was little and I still think it’s funny! There’s nothing more beautiful than those moments where we are so filled with joy, we can just laugh and be silly without a care in the world no matter what’s going on! I have those occasions sometimes no matter how depressed or how much physical pain I’m in. We’re never too old or too bad off (as long as we’re alive) to be simple and silly and full of child-like wonder! 😀

Some scenes are beautiful and serene, some bizarre, and some frightening and very distressing but all together it’s a beautiful story and even though I don’t and never have had a drug problem, I can relate to so many of this man’s underlying experiences.

This isn’t really a spoiler but a line out of the book in case you don’t want to read it and read the book first.
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Just when the man is about to just give up, someone has this to say to him:

“You have so much potential, you can give the world so much, you will give the world so much.” 

“Like I said, the world needs you and eventually it will find a use for you. But not as a repressed drug addict.”

I find this message to be beautiful and inspiring. We are more than just our struggles and pain and we all have potential and so much to give.

We are more than a drug addict or a depressive or schizophrenic, or someone with an eating disorder or low self-esteem or someone drowning in grief. We are more than an asthmatic or cancer patient or an anxious person or whatever physical or emotional ailment or disease we have been afflicted with. So much more. Even when it feels that all we are is someone with pain or a disorder. 

We are not a disorder or a condition or an addiction. I am not my pain.
You are not your anxiety or painful experiences or emotions or words that have hurt you. You aren’t your bad habits or mistakes or flaws or shortcomings.

We have a whole personality and love and skills and gifts beneath those labels and agonizing experiences. Look, feel, and they are there. Here. 

We have so much potential.

So this book is a fun thriller and mystery but it’s also much more.  It’s grounded in hope and healing.

And I just feel the desire to share!

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Even if you don’t read the book, maybe you can find these little reminders helpful or inspiring anyway!

❤

Lots & lots of love to you! 😀

Xoxo Kim 

Best Days <3

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“Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson 

This post is about a day that I can say with complete certainty is one of the best days I ever experienced. I can’t say I have one day that is “the best day of my life.” I have occasions many days that I can say qualify as “the best.” And I don’t think there should be just one or a few days that are the best. I want to make every day as best as possible. Some will be better than others. Some will even suck for the most part and that’s quite alright!

But some days really stand out to me as the absolute best! And Monday, June 1st, 2015 is one such day!

Why do I remember the date? I’m really not sure. Maybe because it’s the first day of the month? Nothing significant happened at all. I wasn’t on vacation. In fact I was at work! How many people can say one of the best days of their life, was at work during the work hours?! Lol But I can! 

There was no “socially acceptable” (for lack of a better way of putting it) cause for celebration. It wasn’t a holiday (that I know of), no hanging out with friends, no graduations, weddings, engagements, job promotions, childbirths, amazing news,…that I was somehow associated with.

It was just a slow, calm, rainy night at work. I was alone, drinking hot tea, reading my zombie-like/apocalyptic thriller which I was loving to pieces. It’s my favorite! I was listening to a few great songs over and over, including Len Barry’s Bristol Stomp. I probably had a headache (because when do I not have a headache?), I did not have much money (because when do I ever?), my grief was still somewhat new (I lost a coworker, who I was close with, to unexpected death in February) it wasn’t my favorite kind of weather (except the rain and it was cooler that night than it has been), it was bordering on Summer. I’m more of a Fall/Winter kind of girl, it was quiet and still and I was waiting for a mystery thriller novel to come out that was to be released in eight days. 
Book 2 of a series by Dr. Carey Baldwin, and I waited seven months for that thing to be released!! Seven months! (and I’m in the middle of another seven waiting for the next! January 2016!) I could not wait! I was so happy that day knowing in just over a week, it would be in my hands (or on my Kindle app to be more accurate). I read it in less than one day!  It’s not a novella or anything, I just read it non stop til it was through. (And so did a few others because when I looked there were already four reviews for the book, just a few hours after it was released! So, it appears I’m not the only fanatic who waited up all night til it showed up on Kindle then devoured it all in one sitting!)   

So my point is that nothing significant at all happened. And the conditions were not perfect to me. Like I said, I had no money, it wasn’t like it was my favorite season, I wasn’t at home being able to do whatever I wanted or on a big fun-filled vacation…yet I can safely say it’s one of my sweetest, most cherished memories. One I will always keep with me.  

I did not want the night to end. I remember I stood up and looked at the clock on the wall hoping it wasn’t nearing 10:00pm because then I would have had to leave. I wasn’t obsessing over the time. I was being mindful that night. But I stole a glance as I leaned against the counter in the store I work at. I remember the exact moment it happened. It was just after 8:00pm. The moment I declared, just in my head though, this to be one of the best days of this life of mine. I even smiled to myself and felt awe at the fact that I can find so much beauty in simplicity and monotony. And as is typical of me, I also felt amused. 

This can seem pathetic of me or absolutely wonderful depending upon the way we look at it. 

Pathetic version: “seriously?! This girl must have nothing going on, must have a very boring life for a night at work with nothing happening to be the best! Omg, How sad!”

Or!

Absolutely wonderful version: “seriously?! This girl must have an amazing life to be able to take an ordinary day, rainy, at work, nothing big going on and STILL find wonder in everything!! Omg!”

Lol

See?! All how you look at it! 😀

Let’s go with option number two though!? ;-D

My whole point? Any old day can be the best and our conditions do not have to be perfect to us, at all to be happy, thrilled, serene, to find love and joy and feel that this moment is absolutely, without a doubt, perfect. We can be in pain, broke as a joke, at work!, with nothing of importance (in a social way) going on and it still be the best!! It’s all about mindfulness, gratitude, and attitude! 

I can’t say for sure what makes a day “one of the best,” really. There were other great days I was in a fantastic mood, reading something sweet or doing something else fun, even in conditions that were more “perfect” to me. Weather I like better, more money that day, something blatantly thrilling happening, out shopping, on a fun vacation, out at a restaurant….and were still beautiful days but did not necessarily stand out to me as “the best” or as great as that day. It’s not always something that can be identified or defined. But attitude and mindfulness and gratitude definitely play a big part. 

“Goodness is easier to recognize than to define.” ~ W.H. Auden

We often tend to think that a “best day of my life” has to be something tremendous like our wedding day, having/adopting a child, getting engaged to be married, graduating some school or program, vacation days, holidays or some dramatic celebration, winning the big lotto,…and it’s fantastic to have those as some of our best days but it’s also ok and amazing to declare a simple, ordinary day as one of those best days! Let’s not hold back waiting for more or better or the perfect conditions, to be happy and consider this day the greatest day of the year/our life! This day is ours to cherish. ❤

“Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so. One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return.” ~ Mary Irion

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I found this image here:
Tina Lewis Rowe – Insights, Information, and Inspiration 

We may think of normal days as boring or plain or mundane and feel the need for something more. It’s ok to want and work for more. But let’s remember to cherish those normal days and keep in mind that one day, we may wish with everything we have in us, that today was just a normal day. People struck with tragedy, illness, pain, violence today….may wish that today was just like any other day. No matter what happens today though, we can find some good if we try. 

And even if a day is really shitty, there can be some happy moments to seize and hold onto! Let’s remember those ones! Let’s create memorable moments each day or most days. Then we can look back and say “Yes! That was the best!” even if we don’t remember the date. Each day, for most/many of us, is probably so mundane, so ordinary, even if it’s fun and happy, that it slips our memory when it ends. If nothing “big” happens, it’s unlikely to stand out later. All those little pleasant moments slip away into oblivion never to be held again. The scent of the flowers that caress our noses as we walk to a store, the comfort of our child or puppy/kitty curling up on us to sleep, sitting in a cafe with a sweet friend, belly laughing at a hilarious joke or something we read or remembered or saw on tv, drinking hot tea, reading a wonderful book on a cool night…these things we appreciate then they’re gone. So let’s be more mindful of them while they are occurring. They are so fleeting. Let’s grasp them. Imprint them into our hearts forever. Make it a point to remember. Take pictures. Create gratitude lists. Publish blog posts/statuses about them, scrapbooking, journaling…or just be genuinely mindful and then we can always remember. 

“Life isn’t perfect but it has perfect moments!”

❤

Much love to you,

Xoxo Kim 😀

You’ve got LOVE mail!! <3

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“No stars are out tonight but we’re shining our own light.”

In the novel I previously wrote about, “The Last of Her Kind,” one character, a young woman, who I wrote about here,loves Mick Jagger and she heard that he was receiving “hate mail” so she decided to send him LOVE mail!

She writes this:

“I understand that you have received a lot of hate mail and even THREATS AGAINST YOUR LIFE. This has really freaked me out and has made me decide to write you LOVE MAIL every day. I don’t want you ever to forget that your true fans cherish and adore you and will always stand by you.” (pp. 170-1)

I just LOVE this concept! Not just sending someone love mail, that too, but bringing light and positivity into places where there is a lot of darkness and pain or negativity. It’s great to be positive in general but it’s especially important to bring light & love to places where it’s really lacking.

I love how this character decides to take action to bring love to a place that she knows needs more. She is kind enough to reach out and remind the man that people still love him. He may or may not need that reminder or even care about all the people who loathe or even love him. But it’s still good to see someone putting love out into the world. It’s the best we can do. ❤

If we see someone receiving unpleasant messages on social media, let’s make it a point to write that person positive or encouraging messages. If we meet or know someone who is hopeless, let’s attempt to bring some sense of hope to that person. Maybe it won’t work but maybe it will and at least the person will see someone cares. Let’s brighten a dark room with the light of our smiles. Bring our own sunshine to a rainy day. Send healing energy to someone sick or in pain.
Let’s remind people that for all the negative they encounter, there’s so much more positive.
Like the character in the book reminds Mick, while there’s so much hate directed at him, there’s also so much love.
Let’s focus more on the LOVE. ❤
Wherever we see that positivity, inspiration, light, or love is lacking, let’s bring our own to those places. ❤

And remember when someone unnecessarily criticizes us, writes us a rude message, doesn’t like us, wants to see us fall…there’s way more people who do like us and ones who would if they knew us. There’s more who want to bring us up and see us succeed. It’s sometimes easy to focus on the one or few unpleasant comments or remarks or experiences. But there’s more love in the world than negativity.

Also, as I mentioned in my other posts about this book, on pages 79-81, there is a r*pe scene in case you read the book and want to skip it.

And here’s a sweet song:

All I Need – Jack Wagner – mobile

All I Need – desktop

Lots & lots of LOVE & hugs to you, whoever you are, wherever you are!! 😀

Xoxo Kim ❤

Yin-yang

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In a previous post,Embracing the Light,I mentioned I’m reading a novel called, “The Last of Her Kind” about two girls who were best friends in college for a couple years then had a bad argument and ended their friendship but the woman telling the story, many years later, still thinks of her former friend very frequently and is still impacted by her friend even though she has not seen her in years. She seems to no longer have any hostility for the girl who was once her best friend.

This isn’t a book review. I’m still reading the book, I haven’t reached the end yet. It’s a very great book, incredibly realistic and deep. There are beautiful scenes in this book. I will share one here.

But first I will again mention like I did in my other post, that there is a brief rape scene in the book. Whenever I write/talk about books that I know there is sexual violence in, I caution people in case anyone wants to avoid that part. I know it can be extremely traumatic for some people to read if they have experienced some kind of trauma. So on pages 79-81, the narrator talks about when she was raped by a stranger in a park, as a college girl. The worst of it is on page 80 in the book I’m reading. I think it’s a good idea if we all caution anyone we tell about a movie or book that has a scene like that. Even if people stop reading/watching after they begin,it can be too late and post traumatic stress or flash backs or any distress can already be triggered. Or some people feel that once they begin something, they have to complete it or may not realize after they begin reading/watching, how bad it will be. It’s always good to try to help in any way we can and a simple caution can help prevent a serious trigger for someone. They may still read/watch anyway and that’s up to them but it’s good just to let them know. 

(there won’t be any really big spoilers here but if you prefer not to know anything more about the book you may not want to continue reading if you plan to read the book)

Anyway, here is one of the beautiful scenes I will share out of this book:

“She lit a few candles around the room and she lit some joss sticks and she got out her guitar. I listened to her sing and wondered when she had become so good. Her voice was assured and pure and vibrant with feeling. The songs she sang were mostly songs she had written herself, and they were about love and pain and what was right with the world and what was wrong with it, and for all she had suffered she praised the wounded world and sang of her tender feelings for man, she sang angelically of hope and forgiveness, and I was blown away by this kid’s wisdom and goodness, and I was proud. Maybe my little sister didn’t have to go back to school. Maybe she knew everything already.” (pp.181)

How beautiful! The narrator, Georgette, has this to say about her little sister. 

Her sister is severely mentally ill and struggles with substance addiction and some physical illnesses,she cannot have children, she was also abused as a child and had, and still in some ways has a very difficult life. She has recurrent psychiatric hospitalizations. She doesn’t have a complete high school education. But she is full of deep wisdom, and often is able to keep hope and wonder alive and not only praise the good in the world but celebrate the bad with the good through her music, writing, and just in her being. She has a kind and gentle heart. 

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This is only a fiction book but there are real people like this too. Those who choose to cherish the good and use the negative aspects of life to their advantage by creating whatever it is they feel a calling to create…music, artistic material, singing, dancing, writing….or anything. We can take our pain and struggles and allow them to deepen our empathy and compassion for others. And we can take all our pain and joy and beauty and create something. Even something as simple as a blog post or message to help inspire or uplift others. 

Life doesn’t have to be perfect or without pain to be good. Life is beautiful even with the pain. Sometimes we may forget to celebrate the good when we’re too consumed in the pain, negativity, or distress and it’s great to have reminders.  

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(the sky wasn’t really this bright & pink, I put an effect on it but it’s pretty isn’t it?!) 😀

The world is full of bad but it’s also full of good. When we see on the news or are involved in tragedies like massacres or hurricanes and tornadoes, floods, fires, accidents, sickness….we see/feel/know the devastation. But we also see/feel/know the love and compassion of others, even strangers, that comes pouring in to those in need. We see people volunteering time, donating money and other material objects, offering to help, and just sending positive comments and well wishes. For every rude comment we receive on social media, we receive many more loving ones. 

❤

There is more love, more light, more good than pain. And it's all what we focus on that will stand out. We don't have to deny the negativity, we can help it when we can and accept it and use it for good when we cannot help or prevent it. 

This beautiful scene is a great reminder to bring more hope and forgiveness to the world, more love and light and acceptance. We can't all sing and play instruments and write songs like this girl but we all have some way to bring beauty to the world even if it's just a warm smile or positive attitude or just sharing an uplifting quote. 

We all have the ability to put more light out into the world. ❤

Much love to you! 😀

Xoxo Kim 

October <3

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“I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers.” ~ L.M. Montgomery 

October is back again!! Like a long lost friend waiting to be warmly embraced! And it couldn’t be more perfect! It’s cold & rainy today!!

❤ 😀

In honor of this beautiful month, I will share some lovely Fall quotes & my pictures! 

Here goes! 

“Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns.” ~George Eliot

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“October’s poplars are flaming torches lighting the way to winter.” ~Nova Bair

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“Falling leaves hide the path so quietly.” ~John Bailey

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“Winter is an etching, spring a watercolor, summer an oil painting and autumn a mosaic of them all.” ~ Stanley Horowitz

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Pumpkin ice cream!! We have pumpkin & pumpkin pie at work! The pumpkin pie has pie pieces in it which I love but I like the taste of the pumpkin better! They’re both delicious though! Yum! ;-p 😀 ❤

“Listen! the wind is rising, and the air is wild with leaves, we have had our summer evenings, now for October eves!” ~Humbert Wolfe

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Pumpkin pj’s!

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“The milkweed pods are breaking, and the bits of silken down, float off upon the autumn breeze, across the meadows brown.”~Cecil Cavendish

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“Then summer fades and passes and October comes. We’ll smell smoke then, and feel an unexpected sharpness, a thrill of nervousness, swift elation, a sense of sadness and departure.” ~Thomas Wolf

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Full Autumn Moon ❤

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“October gave a party; The leaves by hundreds came – The Chestnuts, Oaks, and Maples, And leaves of every name. The Sunshine spread a carpet, And everything was grand, Miss Weather led the dancing, Professor Wind the band.” ~George Cooper

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It’s Hoodie weather!! Doesn’t get much better than this!!

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There’s so many, many things to smile about! 😀

Let’s remember to be mindful of all the beauty around & within us. ❤

And here’s a song for you!!

I love this old video, it’s a youtube video of like an old show or something in the 1960’s and it’s the song “Monster Mash” sung by Bobby Boris Pickett! ❤

Monster Mash – mobile

Monster Mash – Desktop

Happy, Happy October & lottsa, lottsa love to you!! ❤

xoxo Kim 😀

Look to each other for love <3

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Here is a song sung by Bill Withers I love! It’s about loving each other and looking on the bright side of life! Money and other material things, competitions, success with jobs and things can bring us a certain kind of happiness but true boundless happiness is discovered through love, not just romantic love, but love as a state of being, love for others, love for life itself. All those other things can complement our happiness and joy and add to it but without love, it’s likely we would still feel empty and not very happy, no matter what else we have. Love doesn’t just have to be for a specific person or thing but also just a way of life. 

“Let’s look to each other for love
Look on the brighter side of life
And the world that we share
Can make us happy
Look to one another for love
Look on the lighter side of life
And the way that we are
Can make us happy”

Check out the song!

Look to Each Other for Love – desktop

Look to Each Other for Love – mobile

Lots n Lots of love to you!

😀

❤

xoxo Kim ❤

Beyond Beauty

devynpearle's avatardevynpearle

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You’re more than enough and you’re here. Try not to base your self worth on a fleeting characteristic like attractiveness. When I’m 100 I won’t give two hoots what my soul carrier looks like, I will appreciate it’s presence in any form.

I have been noticing the Beauty Beyond size campaign and having worked for Lane Bryant in the past it’s so great to see a few familiar faces from their advertisements making such a huge difference. I honestly girl crush on all of them on instagram with the rest of the world. The body types represented in this body positive force are what I’ve idealized my whole life.

Currently I’m more petite and having been a size 16 for many years I miss my curves! I hear from so many women that they need to lose 15 pounds and then they’ll look okay and most of the time…

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Protector Day – Avalokiteshvara

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Look who arrived in the mail today! And today also happens to be Protector Day!! ❤

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This is Avalokiteshvara. He is the embodiment of love & compassion for all living sentient beings. He is one of the most celebrated of the bodhisattvas. According to the story, he chooses not to enter the blissful state of Nirvana, so he can remain here with us on Earth and save everyone in need. He is devoted to the salvation of others and this displays his fierce compassion and the depth of his love. 

His mantra is Om mani padme hum, which is said to contain all the teachings of the Buddha. 
Saying this out loud or silently is supposed to invoke the powerful, benevolent attention of Avalokiteshvara.

I love this man who is symbolic of love & compassion for all. His compassion is so complete that nothing can break him and he can handle anything. He is a great reminder to all of us, Buddhist or not, to strengthen our compassion for others. Not just humans but anything that can feel and has interests. 

Imagine having compassion so complete, so deep, so full that nothing can seriously disturb us. 

Here is to Avalokiteshvara out of the booklet.
Praise to Avalokiteshvara:

“You whose white coloured body
Is unstained by faults,
Whose crown is adorned with 
A fully enlightened Buddha,
Who gaze upon migrators
With eyes of compassion,
To you Arya Avalokiteshvara
I prostrate.”
(out of the prayer booklet)

We can offer him beautiful things such as flowers, candles, sweet fragrant things, tea, the sun & the moon….not that he needs these but it shows our devotion to universal compassion and gets our own minds in the habit of love. 

Here is the prayer booklet info.:

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You don’t have to believe in someone who actually hears prayers for this to be helpful. As I said, it gets our minds in the habit of acting and thinking purely and lovingly.

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These two are photos out of the booklet.

Here is the visualization:

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And here is a beautiful song with the mantra said throughout:

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Om mani padme hum – mobile

Om mani padme hum – desktop

It’s a great song to meditate to! And play in the background of whatever we’re doing. It’s over 23 minutes long and I listen to it very frequently. It’s soothing and inspiring. I’m listening to it right now! 

Here is my necklace with him on it.

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His four arms! It’s just adorable! 

I love when they have multiple arms! 

And here is my Mala, for the mantra om mani padme hum.

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Isn’t it beautiful?! 

It’s believed by Buddhists that just seeing this mantra or hearing it has very powerful effects and just seeing a Buddha statue or picture is as good as seeing the real thing!  

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I just love how he came to me today on Protector Day!! How sweet!!! I ordered him a few days ago! 

Happy Protector Day!! I think this day is a fantastic reminder to use our power to help others. Most of us have power over someone and are in a “lower” position than someone else. Let’s use our power and advantages for good. To help, uplift, inspire, heal, hug, and love. Let’s lift people up, not drag them down. Lift each other in love. ❤ ❤

😀

Lots of love to you!

xoxo Kim