Tag Archive | beauty

I’m Gonna Spend Another Fall in Philadelphia…<3

My long lost friend is here once again, Fall!! And what better city to be in than Philadelphia?!?! The cool nights are just about here, I’m already seeing crunchy, colorful leaves appearing, the pumpkin Spice stuff is back!! I’m so happy! Yay!!
;-D

Here’s a poem I like:

“Fall will soon be here again,
That special time of year
When colored leaves of red and gold
Will suddenly appear.

Fall will soon be here again,
And joyful I will be
Because it is the season
When my heart feels glad and free.

Fall will soon be here again;
Tomorrow it will start,
And I shall feel both happiness
And beauty in my heart.

Fall will soon be here again
And Summer will be done,
But Autumn is the time of year
When my life o’erflows with fun.”

~Hope C. Oberhelman

So yeah, as Hall & Oates says “I’m gonna spend another Fall in Philadelphia”!!!

I hope you all are having a beautiful day or night wherever you are! 😉

Xoxo Kim

Beauty in Unlikely Places (updated) <3

Sep11

I have been thinking about things that I find to be beautiful which many people do not. Things which many see as ugly, mundane, inappropriate, disturbing, less than lovely.

Here, I have comprised a list of some of those things:

❤ weeds- I can't count the
moments I have stopped to snap a gorgeous photo of some "plant/flower" I have found to be beautiful, only for my mom or sister to inform me I'm taking pictures of ugly. Dead. Weeds. But I continue on because to me, weeds, are just beautiful.

❤ Rain/snow/sleet – just about everyone around me complains about "miserable" weather. Rain. Lightening. Thunder storms. Snow. Blizzards. But I love it.

❤ Muddy puddles – yup. I take countless pictures of puddles. With mud. And dirt. And stuff. Sometimes they have oil rainbows. I guess car oil does that. I find wonder in the unlikeliest of places.

❤ Signs of aging – Wrinkles, Gray hair, Laugh lines.. getting older is a true blessing. It brings more experience. More lessons to learn & to teach. More wisdom. Many people die tragically young. We are blessed to be whatever age we are. If we live to be old, gray, wrinkled, it means we had more days to live & to love. To bless & be blessed. To see things, to know things, we could have never imagined. Embrace your age. Embrace the signs of aging! Scream your age off the rooftops. Be proud you survived and are still going. ❤

❤ Body fat – yes I'm a girl who loves body fat! It's a sign of health. It has a function. It's not ugly. It's beautiful.

❤ The female physique – I am a girl who really loves checking out other girls. I'm not romantically attracted to them but I find them to be very aesthetically pleasing. Not in a sexist way, I know a woman is much more than just looks! And I am interested in personality, thoughts, views more than anything! But I love girls' curves, clothes, Boobs, nails, hair. I even call girls sexy. Hott. Beautiful. Gorgeous. I have been told "girls aren't supposed to check out other girls or call them hott. ". And I say whatever to that! I like tight, revealing clothing for myself and other girls. I don't see it as disrespectful or degrading. It's great to be confident and love our bodies. If you got it, flaunt it! And if you don't, flaunt it anyway! Lol ❤ ;-D

❤ Dark poetry/songs – I like poetry that can beautifully capture the dark side. Sad songs & poems can be inspiring & comforting. I love happy ones as well! I like how pain can be made into beauty. Poetic, lyrical,musical, educational….beauty

❤ Monday Mornings – not that I'm usually awake on Monday mornings. Lol ;-). So maybe that's why I love them so much! But Monday mornings are, to me, symbolic of new beginnings. New hope. Mornings are always beautiful

❤ Public displays of affection – some people find this inappropriate but I love to see lovers holding hands, kissing, embracing. ❤

❤ Babies with food on their faces, snotty noses, messes on the carpet: I love babies/kids and I think it's cute when they make messes. I would never mind having my carpet or furniture splashed in paint by little creative hands exploring & creating. Just beautiful.

❤ cars screeching, people laughing late into the night , the sounds of the city, music through the walls, the sounds of people partying all night- this annoys a lot of people. Someone being loud late at night. But I have always found it so comforting. I like knowing someone somewhere is up & alive while I'm laying in bed.

❤ pineapple pizza – delicious. But people tell me it's just wrong. Lol

❤ the scent of dogs. Lol I think dogs smell good, their fur, it's just a cute Lil scent.

❤ the feel of dogs licking my ears. Lol. It feels funny & it's cute! 😉

❤ Insects/bugs/snakes/rodents – I like creepy crawlers & not just the "pretty" ones. I also like centipedes, millipedes, sewer rats….

What unlikely things do you find beautiful? Is there anything “weird”, “bizarre “, “ugly”, “plain ” , “unusual” that you somehow find incredible wonder in? If not, take a look. Maybe you can develop a positive habit of seeing beauty where it at first seems there is none.
As I have previously mentioned if we look hard enough, we can find beauty even when it’s hard. Even through the tears, glittering amidst the pain & heartache.

Wonder what it would be like to have a journal of Beauty? Maybe like a gratitude journal but slightly different? You can use it every day or especially when you can’t seem to find beauty anywhere. I never tried it but I will! We can list things we find to be beautiful, any kind of beautiful. They can be things commonly thought of as beautiful or things usually viewed as not so pretty. They can be things seen or things felt. Heard or tasted, smelled.
.anything. If it’s beautiful to you,it matters.

May you all find something lovely to experience whether it’s auditory, visual, tactile, or anything….

Xoxo Kim

i stumbled upon this beauty on the counter at work one night. She’s not dead and that thing is not her leg off. It’s a scratch in the counter. My sister thought she was dead and that her leg was off. She may have been slightly injured but still beautiful. Still alive & well. I picked her up with my hands, gently and put her in the tree outside work so no one would freak out and kill her. 😀

And the picture all the way at the top is in fact a puddle of mud that happened to have a heart thing in it.

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are 7 million.

Your Beautiful Body – {awe}, {wonder}, {inspired} WOW! :-D <3

Sep1

I am often filled with wonder and awe at the things around me and within me. I believe that every single one of us should take full advantage of being alive. And not just by realizing your big dreams or doing more of what you love or being around people who make you happy. All of that too. But one way to take the experience of being alive and conscious and make the best of it is to milk it for all you can, yup, milk that shit for all (or awe?!) it’s worth! Lol

And I’m not the only weirdo who thinks this way! Lol. Need some convincing? Here you are:

http://thedailylove.com/don’t-just-think-about-it-–-thank-about-it/

I read that when it first came out and I could not believe how it resonates with me and how someone else feels this way! Wow!

Look around you. Look. What do you see? Hear? Feel? Smell? Taste? The same things you always do, right? All the ordinary. Mundane occurrences. Monotonous things. Nothing special, right?

Wrong!

Everything is amazing. Beyond amazing. Everything is truly incredible. Wondrous. Miraculous. There is astounding beauty all around. Within.

Look at the trees, the branches and leaves blowing in the wind, feel the air on your skin, look at the sky, take in the scents all around you, listen to the songbirds, the crickets, the cars, taste the food you put into your mouth, citrus like the sun, sweet like honeysuckle flowers drenched in morning mist, salt like tears, tears of heartbreak & joy, pain & gratitude..bask in the wonders, the rain upon your skin..watch the sun awaken or set. Or both.

You don’t have to believe in any supernatural beings, religion, or any spiritual realms to see everything, even the “ordinary”, as a “miracle.”

Just because we have instant access to something every single day doesn’t mean it’s not beautiful or wondrous or that it can’t be awe-inspiring. I love that I can see every day. That I can hear. That I can wake up. That I can walk. That I can look up at the sky and feel life surge through me like electricity.

I have been able to do these things all my life and if nothing goes very wrong, I always will! But it just never gets old.

Sometimes beautiful things and a feeling of wonder and awe of life may come so easily, naturally, automatically but other occasions it may be hard to see beauty or feel inspired and we really have to look and make a conscious decision to look for it and receive it.

I don’t know most people but it seems to me that most of us do not have many awe-inspiring experiences or feel wonder and beauty with each breath or even just once a day.

I’m not talking about the overuse/”misuse” of the word “awesome ” that many people are in the habit of saying, like when people say like “that car is awesome ” or she’s so “awesome” or that baseball team, well they’re just so…
Awesome, meaning those things are “cool” or those are what’s up. Not something that’s trendy and “neat-o” .

Awesome like something provoking a deep feeling of awe in us. Awe – respectful fear & wonder. Like the way Lionel Richie uses this word in his song, “Say You, Say Me”.

Yup! Some things are so wondrous, so beautiful, it’s quite scary! ;-O

We see aesthetically pleasing things or hear them frequently if our senses function but how often do we let those things inspire us to the bones, to the core? How often can we feel them tingling in every cell of the body and deep into the marrow of our bones? How often are we overwhelmed, weak at the knees just thinking about the astounding gift of being alive? And not just things experienced through the senses but everything. Everything felt inside. Heartwarming. Look at your friends. Your family. Your pets. Yourself. And feel how incredible it is to have have those things. Those people. Not just like having fun with, & loving them but how amazing it is, the experience of knowing them, of having them.

We take so much for granted. The beauty I feel runs so deep. The love. The inspiration is so ingrained. I have these moments usually at least once a day, usually strongest at night or the early morning. It’s like the wonder of a child, or a philosopher. Or someone who has just stepped out of a life of utter darkness.
As if a big, thick, heavy quilt was just snatched off of me after a life of being covered by it. And now I can see. And I will never be used to this feeling.

What is it? This feeling that overcomes me, breathes in me when everything just astounds me and I cannot believe I am blessed with such shocking, unbelievable beauty & love & inspiration & life ?

I speak of developing & strengthening positive habits frequently and this is one habit that I believe is incredible to develop and maintain.

When we look and appreciate and meditate upon the goodness of these wonders and joys, and look & see with “new” eyes as if we have never really seen before, when we imagine a life without these wonders, it can help us so much to feel, live, and breathe life, inspiration, beauty.

When we think, “What are the chances?”

Think of your body. How often do you think we think of our bodies? Very frequently right? But usually when we think of our own body, it’s about or in relation to its appearance, the aesthetics of it, how it looks to us and others, or when it’s hungry.

And usually it seems, at least to me, when people think of their own body, it’s in a very negative way. It doesn’t match up to those standards of beauty we have in our heads about how it should look or be.

But for once, I would like everyone to silence the hostile and toxic criticism of the appearance of their own bodies and even the mere thought of its physical appearance and instead look upon it with wonder & awe. Not for what it looks like but for what it does.

You think your fantastic car is amazing? Your intelligent phone? Those “I” things with access to the Internet? They sure are but they don’t even come close to the beauty and wonder that is your body!

Your body is one of the most amazing wonders no matter what it looks like or how perfectly or imperfectly it functions.

Your heart. Your lungs. Your kidneys. Your stomach. Your liver. Bones. Blood. Veins. Breath. Nerves. Your eyes. Your ears. Your tongue. Your appendix. Your intestines. Your skin. Every gorgeous curve of your body. Your spleen. Your boobies. (big or small, it doesn’t matter! Lol) Your back. Your spine that holds you. That lovely smile. Your uplifting laugh. Your beautiful eyelashes. Your dna, your fingerprints, your blueprint. Your finger/toe nails. Your hair. Your nose. Your fingers & your toes. All of those things! Isn’t it amazing?!??!

All the things it can do! It allows you to think. Experience. Feel. Live. Be.

Put your hands on your face. Make eye contact with someone, even a stranger, and connect on a basic human level. Smile. Feel those little, beautiful bones in your neck. Look at those lines of life in your wrists. Look at someone else’s body and feel the awe surge through you.

We’re so used to having a body. So used to seeing everyone else’s bodies everywhere we go. We overlook the miraculous wonder of them. The way they exist. The way they function. They way they let us live. My body is beautiful. Your body is beautiful. Breathtaking.

Here are some mind – blowing facts just for you today!

The average adult heart beats 72 times a minute; 100,000 times a day; 3,600,000 times a year; and 2.5 billion times during a lifetime.

Source:
(Parramon’s Editorial Team. 2005. Essential Atlas of Physiology. Hauppauge, NY: Barron’s Educational Series, Inc.)

A kitchen faucet would need to be turned on all the way for at least 45 years to equal the amount of blood pumped by the heart in an average lifetime.

Source :
(Avraham, Regina. 2000. The Circulatory System. Philadelphia, PA: Chelsea House Publishers.)

Every day, the heart creates enough energy to drive a truck 20 miles. In a lifetime, that is equivalent to driving to the moon and back.

Source:
(Avraham, Regina. 2000. The Circulatory System. Philadelphia, PA: Chelsea House Publishers.)

During an average lifetime, the heart will pump nearly 1.5 million barrels of blood—enough to fill 200 train tank cars.

Source:
(Avraham, Regina. 2000. The Circulatory System. Philadelphia, PA: Chelsea House Publishers.)

Check this for more lovely facts!
http://facts.randomhistory.com/human-heart-facts.html

And here ‘s another one for you :

Stomach acid is strong enough to dissolve metal, even sharp objects such as razor blades. Although swallowing metal is never a good idea, it will seriously injure or kill a person before it’s dissolved by the person ‘s stomach acid.
(Li. P. K.; Spittler C.; Taylor C. W.; Sponseller D.; Chung R.S.; Department of Surgery, Meridia Huron and Hillcrest Hospitals, Cleveland , Ohio
Gastrointestinal Endoscopy ISSN 0016-5107)

But isn’t that amazing?! ;-D

And think of when you have a cut or a broken bone. Whether or not you need medical assistance, that body of yours heals itself. Your skin closes back up. It’s almost too good to be true. But it’s not because It IS true!

Imagine walking up a street and out of nowhere being overwhelmed by the incredible beauty of living, imagine the feeling as if you will burst into tears at any moment. Not tears of sorrow or pain. But tears of joy and gratitude.

I want you to love your body for letting you live. And live so well. Nourish it. Cherish it. Your body hears everything you say & think so watch what you say, you don’t want to stress it out! Or piss it off.

Here is something to ponder written by Albert Einstein :

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.

But without deeper reflection one knows from daily life that one exists for other people; first of all for those upon whose smiles and well-being our own happiness is wholly dependent, and then for the many, unknown to us, to whose destinies we are bound by the ties of sympathy.

A hundred times every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life are based on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving.

A human being is part of a whole, called by us the “Universe,” a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separated from the rest -a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us.

Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.

Only a life lived for others is worth living.”

–Albert Einstein

(I don’t necessarily agree with it in its entirety. I like this. Very compassionate & intelligent, generous man! But that last line, it kind of rubs me the wrong way. And not merely because he says we should live for others but the gall to assume only certain kinds of lives or worth living. I don’t think he’s saying we should live to be servants at the expense of our own sanity and welfare but some people may take it that way. I completely agree we should help others and not demand or expect tangible things or favors in return and should have compassion and empathy and that we are all connected in ways. We can help others and love all living creatures without wearing ourselves out to be their servants. We must find the correct balance and set healthy boundaries. But yeah I wouldn’t say any life is ‘not worth living’. But I guess that calls for a whole other post!)

Ohhhh, the wild joys of living…..

“Oh the wild joys of living! The leaping from rock to rock … the cool silver shock of the plunge in a pool’s living waters.” ~ Robert Browning

I hope you find that inspiration, that music in your bones, that magic in your heart, that awareness, & gratitude, those awe-provoking moments that will blow you away. And always remember, even the ordinary is truly extraordinary when we really.

😀

Xo Kim

P.s.

https://livingmindfully.org/

http://www.meditationoasis.com/

It doesn’t take a talent to be mean <3

Aug28

There’s a song I used to listen to over & over when I was a little girl. I can’t remember exactly how old I was but I was very young, not even a teenager yet.

My dad introduced me to the song and I was instantly hooked. I never paid much attention to the words or to the message the singer conveys through her song.
I just loved her sweet, soft, & gentle voice and the music. The song is,
“I’m Sensitive” by Jewel. I remember asking my dad what “sensitive” means and he said it means the girl is easily hurt, saddened, or impacted by other people ‘s actions and words.

And I remember asking him if this girl is really sensitive or if she just likes to sing that she is. I remember him saying “No, she’s really a sensitive girl.”

I remember thinking, “I want to meet this girl.”

I think one of the most poignant lines in her song is:

“It doesn’t take a talent to be mean.”.

This couldn’t be more true. Destructive criticism, cruelty, intentional insults, slander, toxic gossip about others, verbal thrashings, is no special skill or trait and nothing to be proud of yourself for engaging in.

“I was thinking that I might fly today
Just to disprove all the things you say
It doesn’t take a talent to be mean
Your words can crush things that are unseen
So please be careful with me, I’m sensitive
And I’d like to stay that way.”

Your words, even untrue ones which were only said out of anger or jealousy or to make yourself feel better about your own life or self, can have long lasting, devastating effects on the people you inflict them upon.

“You always tell me that it’s impossible
To be respected and be a girl
Why’s it gotta be so complicated?
Why you gotta tell me if I’m hated?
So please be careful with me, I’m sensitive
And I’d like to stay that way.”

Things don’t always have to be so complicated. Love. It’s simple. Your words impact people. For better or for worse.
So why not speak lovingly of yourself and others about yourself and other people?
Let your words heal, not hurt. Bring people up, not down.

Do you have the right to be cruel? To sling ugly words at and about people? Absolutely! At least in U.S. Culture, you are legally protected by our Constitution and so in many cases you do have the legal right to say unkind things . And I don’t argue against that. You have that legal right. And I support your right. And my right.
But just because we can do something doesn’t mean we always should or that we have to. The fact that we can say just about whatever we want and not get in legal trouble is a gift that we tend to take too much advantage of by taking it to the extreme and spewing toxic things out about people. Just because I argue against your words or your intentions doesn’t in any way mean I’m arguing against your right so say what you will. (the argument that people who speak cruelly of others often tend to turn to is something like “I have the right to say what I want…” but I am merely objecting to your cruelty itself, not you legal right to be cruel; you can, if you insist, continue to be very cruel)
You have the potential and often the legal right to knock people down with your words. But you always have the potential and the legal right to bring people up with your words, your warmth, your smile.
And you can choose whichever you want.

What will you choose today?

“I was thinking that it might do some good
If we robbed the cynics and took all their food
That way what they believe will have taken place
And we’ll give it to anybody who has some faith
So please be careful with me, I’m sensitive
And I’d like to stay that way.”

This line is brilliant. What you believe or look for is often what you will find. When you’re in a negative state of mind looking for the bad, you will see it everywhere. When you’re in a positive state of mind looking for the good, you will see it glittering all around and within you.

“I have this theory that if we’re told we’re bad
Then that’s the only idea we’ll ever have
But maybe if we are surrounded in beauty
Someday we will become what we see”

Just like the previous lyrics, we will find what we are searching for. And if we’re surrounded by negatively critical words and allow them to affect us too much, we can start to believe them or just be lowered by them and our views are clouded. But if we are surrounded by beauty, we will become beauty. And our views will be positive and we will see with clarity. There’s is always, always, always something beautiful. To be seen. Or heard. Or felt. Or known. Always. Look for it. It’s there. Let that be what you are and become, not the ugliness.

“‘Cause anyone can start a conflict
It’s harder yet to disregard it”

Yes, anyone can cause problems for others, and drag people down and do things to watch people suffer.
Do you really want to do that? It says more about you than those you slander and gossip about. Even if your accusations and claims are true. Necessary constructive criticism is one thing, cruelty is another.
A person criticizing others just for the thrill of it may feel big & bad but that person is really very small.

“I’d rather see the world from another angle
We are everyday angels
Be careful with me ’cause I’d like to stay that way”

Beautiful ending to a beautiful song. We can train our brains to see the world however we wish to see it. I love how she is a sensitive girl which means she can be easily hurt but she wants to stay herself. Don’t change your beautiful self just for the ugliness of others. It’s good to be affected by people and things. It’s good to feel. To live. To have heartbreak and healing. To be broken then whole. To let people in. To give people and things the chance. A chance to know us, love us, hurt us, and heal us. It’s better than putting up walls and locking people out, we can be hurt, crushed, devastated but it let’s us have deeper, more purposeful relations with people, ourselves and the world than when we live in fear of being crushed. If we lock people out and numb ourselves to our surroundings, it’s true that we may protect ourselves against the pain of rejection, abandonment, and someone we love or anyone seriously causing us pain but we also deny ourselves the depth of true relationships, the sense of closeness, the positivity of people uplifting us, and deep satisfaction of letting the world in. If you make it so you cannot potentially feel deep pain, you also make it so you cannot feel true, profound joy. Is it really worth it?
As the saying often goes, “it’s better to have loved and lost than to never have loved.”. How cliche, right? But for good reason!

I can’t remember when or why I stopped listening to this song. Maybe my cd broke or I lost it. Have you ever just been reminded of a song that was once a significant part of you so long ago? One you listened to over & over and loved deeply? And now you can’t remember or understand why or when you stopped listening to it? It seems to have eventually just slipped out of your grasp and got away . That’s like this song and me. I never got tired of this song but haven’t heard it or even thought of it in decades. Then I received an e-mail by Johnathan Lockwood Huie.

http://www.jonathanlockwoodhuie.com/

One of the ones he sends every morning with his beautiful inspiration.
He sent a list of quotes and one is Jewel ‘s quote in one of her other lovely songs:

“I’m having a bad day. I am not size six.
My legs are not skinny as sticks,
and, someone’s got to pay.”
– Jewel

Lol
When I read this quote I automatically remembered Jewel’s other song, “I’m Sensitive” and I thought “Whatever happened to that song?! Where did it go?! Where did I leave that song?!, packed away somewhere deep in the abandoned crevices of my brain I no longer tend to.” I vaguely remembered the tune, the lyrics, her gorgeous, soft, caressing, comforting voice and I wondered if I would still love it as much. Hoping I would. I found it, downloaded it at one something in the morning after I opened Mr. Lockwood Huie’s e-mail, yesterday morning. I always receive those e-mails at that hour every single morning and it couldn’t be more perfect.
I was half sleeping so decided to wait til later that morning to listen to the song so I can really take it in and get the best of it. Fully, deeply, truly. When I finally listened again to that song that I haven’t heard since I was about eight years old, maybe younger, I did not only love it as much as I did then. I love it more.

It’s beautiful. And now has much more meaning in my heart than it did all those years ago. I’m old enough now to truly understand it. I have my own experiences now to relate with much depth. It’s not just about aesthetics any longer.

And I hope you always remember, dragging other people down doesn’t bring you up. You may *feel* temporarily uplifted but it doesn’t make you any better. Destructively pointing out other people ‘s ugliness doesn’t make you pretty. Unnecessarily magnifying their flaws will never perfect you. It says nothing about them and all kinds of things about you.
Whenever we feel the need to hurt others emotionally merely because we just feel like it we should stop instead and examine our own lives. Instead of trying to destroy others, we should work on ourselves.
I, myself, am not completely innocent of speaking unnecessary, unkind words about others but I know I am above that and I can choose kindness or at least not choose cruelty.

~Kindness is a gift we can all afford to give.~

Will you be the one bringing light to that person in the darkness?

Xox0 Kim

P.s. I would include a link to the YouTube video of the song but I’m using my phone and can only seem to be able to get the mobile version of YouTube. I don’t know if that can work for anyone not using my phone.
😀

Priceless Gifts <3

Aug23

(picture taken somewhere in Center City, Philadelphia, I saw it on a pole and just had to take a pic!)

i have purchased a book a few months ago, and it’s called “Priceless Gifts” (How to Give the Best to Those You Love) and is written by a psychologist, Daniel A. Sugarman, Ph.D. He is a clinical psychologist and the book was published in the 1970’s. 1978 to be exact. I haven’t read the book yet but I will.

I read the list of gifts on the back cover. Even though it was written decades ago, the twelve gifts that the man lists are timeless and still apply today.

They are psychological gifts, not material gifts. This book, even though I haven’t read most of it yet, inspired me to create a list of my own, of priceless psychological /immaterial gifts that I believe are incredible to bless others with and to receive.

While my list is inspired by this doctor’s list, not all of the gifts I list here are ones in his book and the descriptions underneath each gift, even the gifts I took out of the book, are my own. Next to each gift that is also in his book, I will state that I got it out of the book.

1.) The Gift of Time(in the book):
Being with someone who needs/wants you at that moment is an amazing gift. Whether you are having fun doing entertaining activities, talking to one another, or just sitting close to show you care when a person wants company is an amazing gift. It shows the person that you care enough to take part of your day and make that person your top priority at that moment. What better way to make that person feel loved, valuable, and cherished!?

2.) The Gift of Active Listening/ Undivided Attention (in the book) :
We usually hear what people say and respond. But how often are we truly, fully listening? It seems we are frequently only partially or half listening while multitasking, doing other things while a person talks to us, mindlessly/mechanically responding. This is not being fully receptive of or acknowledging that person’s needs and desires at that moment. Even if you accurately hear what that person says and even provide a relevant, pleasant sounding response, that is not always good enough. A person can tell when you are not fully present even if you don’t know the person can tell and maybe even if that person doesn’t consciously know it or realize it at that moment. Make the person feel s/he is the center of your world at that moment. It can be quite offensive spilling your guts to someone only to realize that person is playing with a phone, texting someone else, watching TV, drifting off, or off somewhere daydreaming giving you empty, half mutters while you speak. Whether the person is talking to you about light topics such as her favorite food, book, or movie, or more deep topics such as his problems, pain, future dreams, that person wants your attention! S/he cares enough and believes you are important enough to talk to and trusts you enough to share with you so repay the gift and really, truly listen fully with your whole heart and drown out everything else while that person speaks. (unless you’re driving or something, be careful!)

3.) The Beautiful Gift of Loyalty:
When a person shares secrets with you, s/he expects you to keep them to yourself. It’s not good to blab them to anyone. Many of us have someone we believe we can trust with someone else’s secrets but then the person we trust may also have a person or persons s/he trusts and may tell the person’s secrets to that person thinking it’s Ok to tell and that it will stop there. But then that person tells people and on and on and that’s how “secrets” get around. It’s not that the people who tell other people’s secrets are necessarily bad people and likely they don’t want to sabotage or hurt anyone. They just want to talk and be the big bearer of “news” but it does not always go over too well. So when a trusting person comes to you, it’s best to let that person’s secrets stop when they get to you. (unless it’s potentially life threatening.)

And it’s also best not to gossip about or judge a person, negatively, who trusts you, with other people. Be loyal and true to the person who opens up to you. It’s unkind and a betrayal to trash talk the person or spill their info out to others. Let the person come to you and be a true friend and listener. That is a true gift. And if you are being truly loyal you won’t join in when you hear other people saying unnecessary negative things about your friend.

4.) The Gift of Acceptance (In the book) :
Just about everyone we meet is going to have at least one (probably more) opinion, trait, characteristic, or thing about him/her that we will not agree with or not like. But that does not mean we have to give the person up or not like the person or reject the person or try to change him/her. We can gently state our opinion in a kind way if it’s truly necessary and intended to help or connect with someone and then be done with it. But we can accept the person for all that person is. “Flaws” and all. We can disagree, argue, debate, but still love, cherish, tolerate, and accept. We don’t all have to be identical to get along well and love.

“I ain’t lookin’ for you to feel like me
See like me or be like me
All I really want to do
Is, baby, be friends with you.” ~Bob Dylan

5.) The Gift of Positive Support:
I think just about everyone desires and craves the true support of a great friend or family member or others. Humans are social creatures and like to belong and be accepted and want positive encouragement. We may not always agree with something a family member or friend thinks or does but we should want to see the person happy and healthy no matter what. And we can still support a person, in general, even when that person does something we oppose or thinks something we disagree with.
As stated in the above gift description, we can gently and kindly state how we feel when necessary, and allow the person to think or do as s/he pleases without interference, rejection, and negative judgment. Unless a person is struggling with unsound judgment as a result of illness of any kind or alcohol or other drug intoxication, and wants to do something potentially life threatening to the person or others, we should support the person in her goals and be happy she is happy no matter what.
This also goes when a person accomplishes or attains something we wish we will gain or accomplish. A little bit of jealousy is a normal emotion and is Ok. But don’t let it destroy your friendships or other relationships and happiness for that person. People will always have things we want and can’t or won’t get but we can still be happy for them even though we may feel somewhat jealous or disappointed for ourselves not having it.
6.) The Gift of Sharing/ Self Disclosure (in the book) :
It is a true gift to others to hear of or read of your own problems and struggles, successes and dreams, pain, goals, failings, life lessons, and happiness. It can remind them that they are not alone and it can inspire them to feel happier and act on their dreams and it helps them get to know you and connect with you on a deeper level and trust you more. It may help them open up and share their own stories more comfortably. Sharing is caring! A healthy balance of Sharing with others and actively listening to them speak is amazing! What a true gift!

“What would happen if one woman told the truth about her life? The world would split open.” ~ Muriel Rukeyser

7.) The Gift of Seeing the best in people (in the book) :
Everyone has things about them that are good and bad. No one is perfect in everyone’s eyes. Even the best people you know will have pain, setbacks, problems, failings, struggles, and negative aspects about their lives but instead of focusing on the worst in them, focus on the best!

Let the person know you cherish her/him and support her/him in her endeavors no matter what and that the good is what stands out. People want to be around those who lift them up and appreciate the great and not just criticize the bad. Think of your own “bad” or “negative” qualities. Would you like to be around people who can’t get over them and always point them out and criticize you over them? Or do you want to be in the company of people who love and nourish and cherish your amazing qualities and overlook and accept the bad? Give that gift to others! 😀

And try this: instead of saying “I love you but…..” try saying “….. but I love you!”.

8.) The Gift of letting them make their own decisions without negative judgment :

Many friends or others may want and seek your input on some things and want to know how you feel and if you are true, close friends, they will likely cherish and appreciate your desire to help and your willingness to open up and contribute to their lives. But this doesn’t mean they will or should always take heed of your suggestions or advice. In the end the decision is theirs. It is their life and they are responsible for their own life. The ultimate decision is theirs. They may not always make decisions that you like or want but you don’t have to negatively judge them or criticize them for it. And you don’t have to feel coldly rejected or seriously crushed if they should choose to not do what you suggest. It doesn’t mean they don’t value your opinions or take you seriously, just that in some cases, they have different needs or views. Provide your input and let them know you are right by their side no matter what they choose and if things do not work out well, you are still right here to help them see it through.
It is good for people to allow others the space and liberty to mess up, make mistakes, experiment, be uncertain, but still support them in their attempts and experiences with true, unconditional love, acceptance, and loyalty. What better gift in this life than a friend like this?!

9.) The Gift of True Empathy:

This isn’t to say we should “feel sorry” for people in an arrogant way as if we are somehow above that person or more fortunate than that person. It is to say that we should acknowledge that other people are just as sentient as we, ourselves are. They can feel like we can and they have needs and desires as well as we do. And we should really try to a certain extent to understand how that person must feel even if we haven’t experienced the exact same thing. Not to say “I know how you feel”. That can seem cold and like you are overstepping your boundaries. The truth is unless you can literally get into someone else ‘s head you don’t know exactly how that person feels whether or not you have similar experiences. But we can have some degree of understanding and much compassion and concern for another person. Whether we know the person or not.
We all have pleasure and pain, happiness and sadness, and we can use our imaginations and draw on our own experiences to empathize with someone even if our experiences aren’t exactly the same. Having empathy for animals is also important.

10.) The Gift of Unconditional Love:

True love, to me, is unconditional. If I truly love someone, no matter what that person says or does, I will continue to love. I may feel the need to distance myself in certain ways if that person is doing things, excessively, that are detrimental to myself but my love will not falter or decrease. This even goes for people who want to live without me in their lives. I will be unhappy, crushed, that they feel the need to abandon, reject, or give me up but I want them to be happy with or without me. And I will not stand in the way.

11.) The Gift of True Friendship:

As stated above, even if I must distance myself permanently or temporarily, if someone is my friend, I will always be here as a friend or supporter if that person should need or want me. I may never hang out with or have deep conversations with that person again but I can still wish her the best. I will not reject a friend over disagreements or differences no matter what. I want to know the good and the bad, the happiness and the sadness in the person’s life. I want to write or talk, just to say hello some occasions, I want to see the person and bask in his/her successes and be a true listener and console during moments of stress or pain. I don’t want to be an “occasional” or “seasonal” friend who comes and goes or one who makes pathetic excuses to never hang out. True friends are interested in the good and the bad and will put things on hold now and then to tend to their friends when they need or want them most.

12.) The Gift of Full Forgiveness:

For both you and the other person, forgive. Let go. Even if feelings of resentment or anger reappear every now and then, in general it’s best to accept and move forward, or move on and forget and not let your body frequently fill with fury and negative energy. And not throw a mistake a friend made back into that person’s face again and again or during different arguments. A True, genuine, strong, positive, loving friendship is definitely worth forgiveness. You don’t have to always forgive everything and everyone but in general it’s probably best to try to let your body relax and ease up. This isn’t letting the person off the hook or get over on you. It’s quite the opposite. The person hurt you but no longer has power over you or your life. And if that person is a true friend and is genuinely interested in your welfare that person deserves forgiveness. And you deserve the liberty that your forgiveness will bring you.

13.) The Gift of appreciation and expression : There’s nothing better than knowing a person genuinely appreciates you and all you do. Let your friend, lover, kids, coworker, doctor, secretary, maybe even a stranger and anyone else you appreciate know just how grateful you are for that person’s presence in your life or how that person has touched you for the better. Tell them in person, send them an electronic message, a phone call, a card, or small gift, a hug, anything….just let the ones you appreciate know somehow! It will make them so thrilled!

14.) The Gift of inspiration:
Be a positive, uplifting person. Speak positively of yourself and others and the life you are blessed to know. It’s uplifting and a good example to other people and will make you feel happier and uplifted too. Care for yourself and share your wisdom with others even though some people will not welcome it. Many will! This will inspire people around you to also love and care for themselves and others. If you come up with a great idea about anything or discover an inspirational quote or beautiful poem or photo, share it with people! Bring out the best in people. Smile. Make eye contact. Say hello. Be a blessing. Be a friend.

15.) The Gift of validation/letting others give to us:
Let people think and feel how they do instead of trying to emotionally force them to believe other things. Let them express it. Your input is good but degrading, denying, and ridiculing people’s emotions is not good. If someone is in a bad mood, trying to cheer that person up is sweet but telling the person to “get over it” or that there’s nothing to be feeling low about or criticizing the person ‘s low mood is often detrimental, aggravating, and not helpful.
You don’t have to lower your own mood to match theirs; you can find a good balance to console them.
And when someone pays you a sincere compliment, even if you disagree or are very modest, it’s good to just be happy the person feels that way about you! Saying things like “that’s not true!” or “you’re just saying that. ” or “No I’m not that good looking or intelligent ” will just invalidate the person’s positive feelings about you and deny the person the positive emotions of complimenting you. That person wants you to feel happy and pleased and the person really feels that way about you whether or not you feel it about yourself and it’s not good to tell that person s/he is wrong. A true compliment is a gift to you, why throw it back in the person’s face?! Just a sweet & simple “thank you” is a great response!

16.) The Gift of your life:
If the person is a true, trusted friend to you, share the good and the bad of your life and show genuine interest in the good and bad of that person’s. It’s not good to a person when you only want to vent or gossip and not tell your success and happy stories as well and if you have problems, big or small, a friend wants to know. So if you want to express them, don’t hold back! True friends are genuinely interested in the good and the bad. And it’s good to let your friends complain and vent to you about negative events in their lives and to take pleasure in their happiness. True friendship is about the good, the bad, everything….

“You’ve given me the best of you and now I need the rest of you.” ~ Billy Joel

17) The Gift of communication :

Tell your lover, family member, friend when that person is doing something to really affect you. If people are hurting you, they may not realize it or the extent of it. And it may not be intentional. They don’t always realize how much it impacts you. You can save a relationship or the quality of it by positively and effectively communicating. You can gently tell them that what they are doing is negatively affecting you and tell them you cherish your relationship with them and want to work on it for the better. And don’t just tell the bad things! Celebrate and acknowledge the good as well! Communication is very important in ANY kind of relationship!

These are just some things I find crucial to relationships of any kind and beautiful blessings to people. I believe they are good for people in general. And when you give these lovely gifts, you not only bless the person but you, yourself will be blessed. You may disagree with some of them or many of them. Or all of them?! ;-D
Lol

My intention is NOT to tell people what they should do or have to do or to negatively judge people who do not do these things! I don’t always do all of them myself and I make mistakes but I try my best to frequently live this way and I truly believe these are great and priceless gifts to others. I don’t like to tell people how they should live or what they should do! Who am I to do that! I’m in no position for that! Of course I’m not! But I do love to provide suggestions in case they will help people and share what helps and inspires me. If someone is not inspired and does not want to take my suggestions, that’s ok! Whatever floats your boat! 😉

Xox0 Kim

Mood & Gratitude

Aug18

I’m in a bit of a low mood today. Not for any specific reason. There are some negative things which are contributing to it, like a few people trying to hinder me or hold me back and not let me be or express my true self without them being problematic about it. Taking advantage, intentionally causing trouble. When you’re someone who is shy, quiet, extremely generous, kind, and very caring, people do tend to see what they can get away with and then go all out to take full advantage.

As I have written here before, I struggle with a severe form of depression. And ordinary low moods have the potential to send me into a downward spiral, sinking me lower & lower into a full blown episode of depression and despair. But through the years I have learned to often detect when that is happening and I can often prevent it before it drags me in. It’s hard. Really difficult because when I’m going into a real depression I have no motivation to even try to stop it. I’m tempted to let it just drag me in. Not because I want to be depressed but because low moods and depression can just make someone not want to even try.

But I have to try. I have to because depression is destruction and has destroyed me for months then happy then back for months but I rebuilt myself, mustering all the strength I was able to find in me, and I recreated myself into someone who wants to live more frequently. Someone with zest and passion and love for life and existence.

I don’t want to go back to that dark place where I have dwelled for years off & on. But I haven’t been suicidal for 10 months now. TEN months?!?! TEN months!!! That’s the longest I have not been suicidal (in some degree/form) for about 14 years! I was always only able to go for four months, without thinking about it in some way or contemplating it since 13 years old. This is an incredible accomplishment for me. I could be happy for like four months then suicidal like 4 days or some weeks/months then happy again for a few months. Off and on like that.

I worked on myself constantly in the last three years to better myself and sculpt myself into everything I am now. I am my own masterpiece. And I love it.

Depression for me, all those years, wasn’t just a mood. It was an entity that dwelled within me and lingered around me. A sickness. A darkness. It lived and breathed in me. It would come & go so frequently.

It was so ingrained into me like my dna. My hair color, eye color, skin color. Feeling just as much a part of me as any of those things. It would stay for months.

It made me a monster.

But now. I’m not a monster anymore.

I am just me. This girl.

I still have episodes of depression, sometimes severe, but they are less frequent, usually not as deep, not as long lasting, and there’s no more less severe depression in the middle of severe bouts of agonizing depression. Just happiness. Before I would be happy in the middle but not as frequently.

I’m back now. I’m a happy girl. More often than before! 😀

Maybe my depression will always come and go. But it’s no longer so frequent, and I feel a sense of happiness underneath when Im depressed even more than before. And I can still usually stay positive to some degree even with it.

So today I am trying hard to let this low mood not escalate to despair. I have a strengthened life philosophy now that will not let me go back to that dark place to the extent it used to be.
One of my life theme songs can be “A Whole New World “. What a beautiful song and it fits me so perfectly.

I love Brad Kane/Lea Salonga’s version.

I have some control before it turns fullblown. Once it hits that point though, I don’t have much control. So I empower myself before it gets to that point.

One way is to focus on the goodness within me and around me. Simple things. Big things. Beautiful things. Inspiring quotes, music, people, poetry, writings….

And writing here. I have so much to write here but I don’t write here nearly as much as I would like to. It is not because of lack of inspiration or interest or desire. Not at all.

I don’t really post many simple posts just about what I did that day. I mostly make my posts about inspirational life lessons, analysis, inspiration…stuff like that. personal development stuff.

I like to help others & myself and this is a great way. It helps me to write and can maybe inspire people who may stumble upon it.

I’m happy this post seems to have turned out on the more inspiring, uplifting, positive side, than the pissing & moaning, bitchfest it maybe could have been. Lol. 😉

Here’s a quick gratitude list for today.

I’m thankful….

1.) I got to see my good friend, Mike, yesterday for his birthday and it was really fun!

2.) I’m not often in pain

3.) I learned to cope well with depression.

4.) the coming Fall! Oh how I LOVE that season.

5.) music.

6.) my fur and feather friends.

7.) I don’t have sleep problems.

8.) I like my job

9.) my senses

10.) my bed and blankets

11.) future possibilities

12.) the sky, the sun, the moon, the beauty of Nature

13.) my phone and all the apps and things on it that help me with my personal development journey and are just fun!

14.) books

15.) philosophy

16.) quotes

17.) ten months with no suicidal thoughts or contemplation

18.) the great people I get to meet and interact with at work everyday. I love seeing the families and little kids and love the way their eyes light up and they giggle when they ask for something and they are satisfied or beyond satisfied when I give them it, children & adults alike. I love brightening people’s days and when they brighten mine.

19.) chocolate

20.) shopping malls

21.) gratitude

22.) mom & sister

23.) The book “The Secret Garden”! I have a blog post I’m going to write about this incredible, amazing, beautiful book!!

24.) BlackBerry Kindle

25.) food. Yum! Lol

Yup! I’m blessed. Beyond blessed.

Just focusing on a gratitude list can be so uplifting.

Please check out this lovely page:

http://www.dreamthisday.com/quotes-sayings/inspirational/

For inspirational quotes, writings, and ideas and some gentleness.

Two little words that can make the difference: START NOW.
– Mary C. Crowley

Be avid.
Create apart from perfection.
Risk failure.
Cover your words with sweat.
Run a little
Touch excruciatingly.
Laugh until you cry.
Dance with your eyes closed.
Care.
Understand you die a little in every moment.
Be Enlivened
– Mary Anne Radmacher

Many blessings to you all too.

Xo Kim
😀

Lucky One. <3

Feb20

I love country music. It’s beautiful and amazing and I love that beautiful Southern accent, so gorgeous!

One of my absolute favorite songs, which is a country song, is “Lucky Man” by Montgomery Gentry.

It’s a beautiful song that inspires me everyday. The message in the song is how it’s possible even in the midst of bad things to see what great things we have. It’s about seeing the goodness of our lives no matter what. It’s a very realistic song. The singer admits that sometimes his life really just seems to suck and he compares it to what others have or what could/should have been. But then he looks around at the beauty of his own life and then he realizes all he has. I think this is something we can all relate to. I think just about everyone has those moments or days where we think our life is terrible or we feel ungrateful and uninspired and just want to curse it. But we can just take a breath and see all the greatness we are blessed with.

“I have days where I hate my job, this little town and the whole world too

Last Sunday when my Bengals lost, Lord, it put me in a bad mood

I have moments when I curse the rain

Then complain when the sun’s too hot

I look around at what everyone has

And I forget about all I’ve got

But I know I’m a lucky man”

Montgomery Gentry

For the last few days I haven’t been in the most grateful mood. I wanted to feel sorry for myself and felt myself being pulled into a whirlwind of negative and anxious thoughts.

But I forced myself to see the beauty all around me, to feel the beauty that can be tapped into at any given moment.

Last night I laid in my bed peering out the window feeling pissed and depressed not knowing of one specific reason. I wished I would see a star out the window like I sometimes do. I craved to be inspired by nature’s beauty. But the sky was complete blackness and that just disappointed me. Then sometime later, not sure if I drifted off to sleep or what or if I was just in a sleepy state but all of a sudden I was awake and peered out my window again and through the bare tree branches I saw not one, but TWO beautiful little sparkling stars peering back at me! I felt so amazed and so grateful. It was truly a beautiful experience! 😀

<3.

I truly am blessed to have a bedroom with a window that has a beautiful view of a tree which in warm weather has gorgeous green leaves some resembling hearts and sometimes I can even see stars through the spaces in the middle of the leaves and in the cold weather the branches are bare and I can see stars clearly. So lovely. ❤

I could have had a window seeing a brick wall or whatever but I get to see the beautiful nature’s wonder!

On Valentine’s Day I had it planned to post a self-love post to help people more easily bestow love upon themselves instead of just always lusting after romantic or other forms of external love. But I was somewhat depressed that day and extremely fatigued and I pretty much slept the day away! I wasn’t depressed for any one reason. I guess it was just my chronic disorder acting up. So I slacked on that post but will still definitely post it!

I am a lucky girl. So blessed, it’s true.

I have five beautiful senses. A body that functions perfectly for the most part. I have the stars in the sky above me. What more can I possibly ask for?! 😀

Here is a list of happy and inspirations for me right now!:

1.) I’m so happy the it’s going to be Spring soon! I cannot wait now! Spring to me is symbolic of new hope and new beginnings, new growth and beautiful fruition.

2.) Salted caramel, mocha iced lattes with whipped cream! Yum! 😀

3.) Morning Glory body spray that smells lovely in my hair and is NOT tested on animals! I think the company is Calgon (??). Or something! Lol. I buy this stuff every year and forget! :-p

4.) Philosophy books and readings I have recently come across! I love Philosophy!! ❤

5.) An attitude of gratitude itself is a reason to be thankful!

6.) My pain disorder has been inactive lately!

7.) Today I got to see my coworker’s smiling face unexpectedly and her baby nephew! So cute!! ❤

8.) Cute knick knacks!!

9.). Some inspirational websites I have recently come across!

10.) This quote: “We all take different paths in life, but no matter where we go, we take a little of each other everywhere.” ~ Tim McGraw

“And even my bad days ain’t that bad

Yeah, I’m a lucky man

I’m a lucky lucky man”

Montgomery Gentry

Look at the sun in my pic!! That’s what it really looked like that day! So big. So beautiful! So much inspiration!

❤

I hope everyone can take a moment to see the beauty all around us and stay strong even when you don’t feel much like it! Give more when you feel like giving up!! ❤

http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Lucky-Man-lyrics-Montgomery-Gentry/E02E4AACE15633B048257218000D672A

X0xo Kim 🙂 😀 ❤

P.S. I want to thank all of my followers on here!! I am so honored that you like my blog enough to follow it! Every single one is a true blessing to me!! I couldn’t be happier if I had thousands upon thousands like some people do! 10, 30, 100, 1000, or just 1 makes me happy! I want to reach as many as I can but just touching one life positively is beautiful. <3. And thank you to all the people who like/”like” my content even if you don’t hit the “follow” button!! 🙂

Pain & Simplicity

Feb9

I was thinking recently about how incredibly simple but also painful my life can be and at first that may seem boring, like a bad thing. But the truth is, to me, it’s a beautiful life. My life is generally uneventful and I have never been one to hit up the bars or clubs or have lots of friends and attend big parties every weekend, although I see nothing wrong with that, it’s just not me. Even in college, I would just go to class, some volunteer events and things like that, and then come home. I used to be embarrassed to tell people I just met when they ask me what I do for fun. “I read self-help books all day long” probably isn’t most people’s idea of a thrill but to me it’s one of the biggest.

My idea of fun is cafes with friends and movies with family and some other things too.

Right now, I have a job at a store and am planning on applying for more counseling jobs. I have been criticized by people, especially my family, for “doing nothing” with my life. But that is their idea of “nothing”, not mine. And as long as I’m happy and not hurting or interfering with others that’s all that matters, not what other people think. They live how they choose and I’ll live how I choose. That’s the way it should be.

The truth is, it is possible to be happy with a simple, uneventful, and even a very painful life. But we have to cut back on the comparisons. I used to frequently compare myself and my life to others my age usually. I criticized myself for not being interested in certain things that other people were interested in. I criticized myself for being “too simple”. But now I see the beauty in that. We should all live how we want and let others live how they want to live, not compare in any way. It’s not good to destructively criticize ourselves for not being like others but it’s also not good to act like we are better and other people are lower. We are all different but no one is better.

Recently my facial pain disorder has become more severe and developed on the other side of my face as well. It used to be usually only on the left. Now I have it on the left and the right. I am in pain more often than not. Often it’s mild pain that I am so used to it’s just there in the background the way a chair is against my body or clothes are on my body that I don’t even think of much until something brings my attention to it, or is moderate pain or bordering on moderate with recurrent severe and seemingly unbearable flare-ups. Sometimes the severe pain comes on suddenly without warning. But I have learned to cope with it better. I used to scream uncontrollably during severe flare-ups. I would scream loudly until I would lose my voice. My mom used to scold me for screaming through the night, saying people would think I was being murdered. But I couldn’t help it. I would be in agony and squeeze the bars on my bed or collapse with my face in my hands and just shake for hours in unspeakable, unfathomable pain that I felt was destroying me. Or I would pace constantly all night long until the sun would come up. The facial pain disorder also affects my ears. Think about the absolute worst toothache or any ache you have ever experienced in your life, multiply it by millions and imagine it all over your face, jaw, ears, head, neck, and shoulders and you may come close to understanding what many, many days/nights are like for me. After a severe flare-up ends I am worn out, exhausted, and in shock for a few days after because of the shock and immensity of it and it takes a while to start feeling like and being myself again. But I have learned to cope. And to eliminate or reduce the pain sometimes.

But even with this, I still have a beautiful, wonderful life of joy & beauty. I have also unintentionally developed this wonderful, positive habit of associating my pain with feeling blessed and thinking of joyous things. One coping mechanism of mine is focusing on the joy of life even through the pain as opposed to focusing only on or mainly on the pain. One night recently I was laying in my bed at night when suddenly I felt this shooting, stabbing pain sear through my face, jaw, and ear but instantly I thought of pleasant things like the stars outside my window that I can see through the bare tree branches. Often when the pain culminates to an unbearable level, now I automatically think of something good even if that good thing is in no way connected to the pain.

I have got into the habit of making the pain remind me of something good.

Facial massages, walking, stretches…all that helps reduce it or just helps me handle it better.

Another thing is cultivating and maintaining an attitude of gratitude.

Thinking about and listing things to be thankful for helps not only presently taking the mind off of the pain and onto pleasant things but gets us in the habit of looking for positive and beautiful things in general.

Here are some tips for gratitude journaling:

1.) Keep the gratitude journal ONLY for pleasant things. You can have other journals for other things but designate one just for gratitude lists.

2.). When you write what you’re grateful for, consciously meditate upon it. Savor the feeling, feel it with your body. Let it inspire you and fill you with awe. Be consciously aware. Not robotic and lifeless.

3.). Make this experience fun and positive and don’t see making the gratitude lists as boring or obligatory or as a hassle. Get in the habit of enjoying it! 😀

4.) Make the list as long or as short as you want or need.

5.). Mix it up, you can list everyday routine things you are thankful for in general or things that happened that day that do not happen everyday.

6.) It’s ok to list the same things sometimes on different days.

7.) Carry the journal around with you if you can so you can write things right away that fill you with gratitude.

8.) You can even write how those positive things make you feel or how you felt when certain things happened.

9.) You can also decorate your journal and the pages. Glue on pictures…

10.). Make this a habit. But it may take a while to form and for it to feel natural. After about three weeks it will probably start to feel more regular.

11.) Make the lists even on boring or “bad” days when it seems nothing good has happened. Make them especially on these days when you need some inspiration.

So even though my life can be very painful, it’s still great. And I love the simplicity of it. And I will not let my pain or my physical disability limit me in other ways or destroy me any longer.

We don’t need big things to happen every single day and we don’t need an absolutely painless life to love it. ❤

I hope this post helps some people.

X0xo Kim. ❤ 🙂 😀

Beauty Abound

Jan31

“R

ainbows, spiderwebs, sunsets…the world is full of wonder if only you look.”

Some days are just blah or even ugly when it seems there’s no beauty to be found anywhere. But even those days have small specks of beauty glimmering in places you may not expect to find beauty. When we think of the concept of “beauty” or “beautiful” we often think of explicit or obvious beauty like a beautiful person or a lovely dress or a bouquet of wedding flowers or a splendid garden. Or songs and music. Or a poem maybe.

But there are more subtle forms of beauty, things that we often overlook and maybe even at first glance do not appear to be beautiful until we actually look closer, deeper, or think about it.

If you can hear, you probably hear cars everyday driving by, screeching, beeping, you probably hear people talking outside your house, you hear the soft humming of the refrigerator, the white noise of your tv, the static of your radio….all these commonplace things we tend to forget are actually beautiful sounds and things. What if you lost your hearing temporarily and then you regained it, you would realize this. But hopefully people will come to realize without going deaf. Icesickles hanging off of cars, rainbows in dripping car oil, spiderwebs woven in the corners of a room, the smile of a stranger, the ticking of a clock…all of these little things can provoke wonder & awe.

Beauty doesn’t even have to be things we experience directly through the senses. It can be thoughts or feelings also. I think we all occasionally find that beautiful things just happen to “jump out” at us. We just see or hear or feel them without looking.

But how many of us have actually developed the positive habit of actually *looking* for beautiful things hidden and glimmering in the corners of darkness or ugliness or plainness? I believe we should all cultivate this habit if we want to be inspired and happier more often.

I love to take in the world around me when I go for walks outside. I frequently take pictures of anything that screams out at me and captivates me. Leaves on trees or the ground, flowers in someone’s flowerpots, the sky in all its various appearances, weeds, plants, lights, designs, birds, squirrels…..

My mom & sister often get annoyed going out with me because I stop every other second to snap a picture of something I find to be very lovely.

The tan weeds in my pictures, I find to be astoundingly beautiful but my mom and sister see them as just old dead weeds! Lol!

And look at the gorgeousness of that sky!! If you try you will find specks of platinum among the sand and dirt.

❤

“Nothing is insignificant.”. ~Samuel T. Coleridge

“See the good all around you, even if you have to squint.”

Xox0 Kim ❤ 😀

Les Miserables

Jan5

I recently saw the movie “Les Miserables”. I never really heard much about the novel or play until the movie came out. When I saw the advertisement for it I knew I had to see it! It looked so good and it is so good!!

I couldn’t find anyone who was willing to see the movie with me so my dad drove me and I saw it all by myself! I always wanted to see a movie myself and never have before. I used to think that going to the theatre all by myself is the worst thing on the planet and who would want to ever do that I would ask myself! Lol. But then I came to understand that it’s good to occasionally do fun things alone and this was my perfect chance. And what a pleasant experience it was! ;-).

The truth is, I found some parts somewhat difficult to understand what is happening in that scene. I get the whole gist of it and understand for the most part though.

I found this movie to be heart- wrenchingly sad but also very inspirational and heart-warming. While there are many scenes displaying abuse, slavery, homicide, war, negativity, sickness, poverty, and more there is determination, hope, love, kindness, friendship, perseverance, will, inspiration, and, motivation glittering amidst the pain & heartache. I was thoroughly entertained. It is pleasing to my eyes & ears!! And I plan to get the DVD when it’s released.

We can look at life in general like this. It’s true. There’s so much grief & pain but through it all there is a light and there is love and hope among it all. So why not see that glittering in the darkness? ❤

There are great people who love and long to help the hurting and suffering ones. There is healing and hope.

When we hear of or experience a horrific event, afterwards we see and experience immense strength & hope and people who jump to help during and after the tragedy. Let’s all give thanks to them for shining their light on us all.

Here is a great quote out of one of the songs in the movie:

“Do you hear the people sing?

Lost in the valley of the night

It is the music of a people who are climbing to the light

For the wretched of the earth

There is a flame that never dies

Even the darkest nights will end and the sun will rise” ~ Les Miserables finale song

❤ 🙂 😀

A Dose of Inspiration

One Love <3