“Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn’t matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again, come, come.” ~Rumi ❤ 😀
xoxo Kim
On Christmas day, I went to see a scary Christmas movie at night. It’s called Krampus and is based on the myth of some ancient spirit. The spirit would come to remind and punish those who stop believing in and wishing for good. In one scene, a little girl asked what if they change what they do and act in better ways so Krampus won’t get them, and an old wise lady said it’s not what we do, it’s what we believe.
We often hear the phrase “actions speak louder than words” and “without action, our words/intention mean nothing.” While I agree in some ways, I don’t completely agree in every case.
Sometimes our intention and compassion are enough, even if it does nothing practical. Compassionate intentions, thoughts, and wishes are still good even if we cannot or do not always act on it. It’s good to be compassionate and not cold. Having compassionate, loving thoughts and intentions helps deepen our general compassion, generating loving energy, and making it more likely we will act in compassionate ways. Sometimes just being near a very loving person brings a sense of calm and peace.
And some actions, while looking good, are not performed out of love. Someone can help others just for image or credit or reputation or out of a sense of obligation or feeling awkward not helping.
I think the best actions are those taken out of true love & desire to help.
It’s true that love & compassion are often best when coupled with action. But living in a state of love and compassion in our mind is also beautiful. A loving essence is beautiful
The movie reminds me of this quote:
“Sometimes people are beautiful. Not in looks. Not in what they say. Just in what they are.” ~ Markus Zusak
❤
Much love,
Xoxo Kim 😀
“You are like a candle. Imagine you are sending light out all around you. All your words, thoughts and actions are going in many directions. If you say something kind, your kind words go in many directions, and you yourself go with them. We are …transforming and continuing in a different form at every moment.” ~ Thích Nhất Hạnh
❤ We transform the world with our compassion. ❤
😀
Love & ligt to you!
xoxo Kim
“I believe that the first test of a great man is his humility. I don’t mean by humility, doubt of his power. But really great men have a curious feeling that the greatness is not of them, but through them. And they see something divine in every other man and are endlessly, foolishly, incredibly merciful.” ~ John Ruskin
This quote is full of so much wisdom! Being humble is a good thing and doesn’t mean we are not confident in our own views, ways, lives, self…
Sometimes it’s tempting to boast or become arrogant when we feel that we know something or come to see things in a more enlightened way than before or more enlightened way than it seems most around us see things. And even if we are correct and others are wrong, it’s still better, in my opinion, to be compassionate and humble. So what if we’re right and they are all wrong? It doesn’t make us better or more valuable than others. It doesn’t make us more worthy of anything. It doesn’t make us great to brag or be proud (at the expense of others) of our own great qualities.
Also, it’s possible to be one hundred percent certain we are right…..then find out we were wrong all along! lol There have been occasions I would be arguing with someone and *know* I was the right one only to find out later that I was in fact very wrong!
I was completely convinced I was right. You never know, you may just be wrong.
It’s good to be open to hearing all sides of things even if we know we are right. This can deepen our empathy and also help strengthen our own views and arguments. Why only want to remain “safe” in our own world of only things that confirm what we believe or know? Isn’t it great to be challenged? Even when it’s uncomfortable? I think so!
I believe it’s best not to view ourself as somehow “special” or different or greater than the rest. We may have greater intelligence or compassion or beauty, more skills or talents or money or friends or be more giving and have better morals or anything than someone else but that doesn’t make us a better person. Also, while there’s so many less wise and intelligent than we are or think we are, there’s so many who are more wise and intelligent. And we can always learn something new no matter how much we already know. Everyone can teach us or remind us something even if it’s simply how not to be. It’s possible to cherish our great qualities without feeling like we are somehow great or above others. I believe in what he says, greatness works through us.
Anyone can be great. There are so many ways to allow greatness to work through us. Let’s welcome every opportunity to allow it.
This quote is a great reminder that it’s possible to be self confident while remaining humble and open.
One of the best quotes ever! 😀
Much love & light to you,
❤
Xoxo Kim
“So let’s leave it alone ’cause we can’t see eye to eye.
There ain’t no good guy, there ain’t no bad guy,
There’s only you and me and we just disagree.”
We Just Disagree – Dave Mason – mobile
What a great message and a great song! One of my favorites! Instead of seeing the other person or side as bad or wrong, we can view the situation as just a disagreement and see that most of us usually have good intentions.
😀
I hope you are having a lovely day/night!
❤
Xoxo Kim
“Do you remember me
I sat upon your knee
I wrote to you with childhood fantasies
Well I’m all grown-up now
And still need help somehow
I’m not a child
But my heart still can dream
So here’s my lifelong wish
My grown-up Christmas list
Not for myself
But for a world in need”
This is my grown up Christmas list! It’s a bit different than that materialistic one! Lol
I think it’s obvious what’s on this list. Most of us probably want the same thing, world peace, the end of wars, starvation, diseases, & everyone getting along well…..we don’t always agree on the best methods of achieving that though or every aspect of it and that’s often where hostile arguments occur, not usually because we disagree on the ultimate thing.
So I’m not listing every single thing because that’s so much and so much is obvious. Who doesn’t want world peace?! (well except for terrorists and all maybe….?)
Here is my grown up Christmas list for 2013:
https://inspirationalgem.wordpress.com/2013/12/24/my-grown-up-christmas-list/
And here is my newest one!
Dear Santa,
1.) One of the things I want to end is all forms of bullying in schools, workplaces, cyber-bullying.
This is a serious issue that frequently is overlooked by adults and those who work in schools. It’s not just “kids being kids” and it’s not something that happens to everyone and should be swept under the rug.
Many people say we are all bullied and to just suck it up. No, we are not all bullied.
Most of us probably have had rude things said or done to us at some point or every now and then. But that is not the same as the kids who are the same targets day after day, being tortured emotionally and/or physically for whatever stupid reason.
And not everyone handles it the same.
Not everyone can just “suck it up.” Some people have underlying depression or anxiety or psychotic disorders that are brought out by bullying.
And it’s not just an adolescent problem. It happens to adults in the workplace. Can you believe it?! Adults do this to other adults! And it can affect an adult in the same devastating ways it affects children in schools.
Adults kill themselves too and dread going to work knowing what is coming.
My love & compassion goes to all affected by bullying. Bullies only do this because they are true cowards who feel powerless within themselves so try to make up for it by having power over someone else.
They choose a target, someone they are jealous of or someone they think appears to be weaker in some way, someone who they feel can’t or won’t come back at them. They feel low about themselves even if they seem confident, so they find someone they see as an easy target. Then other people go along with them so they aren’t the next targets or to feel as part of the group of bullies. They want to fit in. Even adults.
It’s nothing personal even though it really feels like it and they often say specific things, maybe even true things, about their targets, things they know will likely get to them. But any of us can say cruel things to and about anyone. We can all have cruel things said to and about us, whether those things are true or not. None of us are perfect in everyone’s eyes.
We can all take any flaw or mistake someone has made and blow it out of proportion and taunt the person day and night, online and in person. It doesn’t mean the person deserves it. It can be done to anyone. I hope you won’t think it is really something about you personally even if what they say is true.
For someone else, they can choose something else and blow that up, magnifying that person’s flaws like it’s the worst thing in the world.
It’s not.
No matter how “perfect” someone appears to be, someone can come along and tear that person to shreds saying true or untrue things.
They take our weaknesses and flaws and use them against us.
It can happen to anyone. It says nothing about us and says something about how the instigator is choosing to be in that moment.
We can all choose to laugh and smirk and whisper about someone and get others to go along with us to try to make someone feel low. It shows how we are choosing to be, not how the person we are doing that to really is.
We only lower ourselves when we do that.
Please hold on. You can overcome it even if you can’t feel that now.
And even if one person or many seem to not like you, many people do like you and love you or would if they knew you.
One day on a suicide memorial page for a teenage child who died by suicide instigated by bullying, I read something I’ll never forget. His mom wrote to all people feeling suicidal and lonely, feeling unlovable, something like “Whoever you are, whatever you do, someone somewhere can love someone just like you.”
It’s so true. We are all desirable to some and not to others. One person or one group of people can make it feel as if the whole world is against us. But it’s never true.
“You can be greater than anything that can happen to you.” ~ Norman Vincent Peale ❤
❤
And if you're the bully, please get help, it's not too late for you to turn your life around and get better and stop trying to destroy other people.
Dragging others down will never bring you up. When we try to degrade someone else, we only degrade our own self.
"We rise by lifting others."
2.) politicians to stop arguing in a negative way and slandering one another and instead attempt to work together whatever side they are on. We can disagree without being vicious. Politicians do a lot of hard work and it takes strength to have a job like that. I love our politicians irrespective of their views. It's not a job for the faint-hearted, for sure! Why not add compassion and wisdom to that strength and determination, even compassion for the "other side." We are One. We are all working or hoping for ultimately the same thing, a better world. We won't accomplish as much good with all the bickering and mocking and anger. Please take your skills and experience and use it for pure good! 😀
3.) people to realize that while anger does fuel us and can give us a backbone, compassion fuels too in an even greater way. Anger can motivate us and anger isn't bad or wrong. When we feel angry about a certain issue we often move to help it, writing to politicians, sharing information, donating money, time,….and this is good. But often while having compassion for one, we have anger for another. For example, if we are for a certain political issue, we may have compassion for those on the side we support but anger and loathing for those on the opposing side and many people think that's a good thing because they say anger motivates us to act. But so does deep compassion. Some people say without anger, we won't act to make things better. Not true. Unless maybe if all someone has inside is anger and it's stripped away. But some anger arises because of the compassion we feel for those wronged. We can work hard for something or someone without anger. When someone hurts our friend or family member, we have compassion for the one hurt and anger for the one who inflicted the pain. But we don't need that anger. It doesn't make us any less passionate or caring if we aren't infuriated by the injustice in the world. We can have much compassion for the one hurt and tend to that person without seeking revenge. Anger can become destructive but compassion and wisdom never do.
If we focus on our love for the people or the issue and focus on our deep desire to see good and see them free of suffering, we can allow the fury for the wrongdoers to melt away.
Feed the love and compassion, not the potentially destructive emotions.
We all have love or the potential for love in us and all have anger or the potential for anger in us, all have positivity and negativity, the potential to hurt and the potential to heal. Which side will win? Like the old Cherokee legend says, “The one you feed.” Let’s feed the positive.
“Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate.”
4.) universal love – some people say this is not practical but that’s because they don’t understand what we mean by universal love.
In this sense, love means wishing everyone the best, wanting everyone to be happy.
But how can that be? What’s best for me may interfere with someone else’s “best.”
Example: If two people go on a job interview for the same job and only one can get the job how can they both get the best?
It may be “best” for a murderer to kill someone but that’s certainly not the best for the potential victim.
For political candidates who lose elections and things, they can’t all have the best in that sense of winning.
But when I wish everyone the best, I’m not necessarily talking about external circumstances and getting everything we want, but inner peace which we can have no matter what goes on outside. I can not get the job but still be happy.
A murderer who experiences true inner peace and love won’t want to kill.
I wish everyone the best but not at the expense of others.
5.) I wish for all sentient beings including humans, animals, insects….to be free of suffering and full of love.
6.) I wish for homeless people & animals to stay safe & warm in the bitter cold Winters and cool in the scorching hot Summers. And shelter animals to all find their loving furever homes. ❤
7.) I wish for us to live in deep compassion & evolved empathy for each other and all living sentient beings.
8.) Us to take better care of our beautiful Earth and be more mindful of even just simple things we do. For example, using environmental friendly cleaning products more than damaging ones. Any little thing may help or at least just get our own minds in the habit of being more caring. ❤
9.) For all kids who celebrate or would celebrate holidays/birthdays to have toys and gifts. Some families don't celebrate with gifts or don't celebrate at all and that's ok, nothing wrong with that! But some kids have difficulty getting gifts because their families are financially struggling or they don't have a family. I think all kids who celebrate or would, with gifts, should have baby dolls and teddy bears and packages to open and whatever teenagers like these days. (I was a teenager once but it was ages ago and I don't think it's the same as now, we did not have smartphones and ipads and whatever else! Lol) This is more than just materialistic. Part of being a child is having fun, the joy of playing with toys and things. I used to love baby dolls and Barbies and frequently got them for holidays and birthdays. And I don't want any kids to be without the joy of things like that just because they don't have much money or don't have a family. We can help sometimes by donating toys to places collecting them and sending cards to hospitals collecting them for the children.
10.) world peace. ❤ lol can't forget this one! It's a cliche but for good reason! 😀
“No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
Everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end
This is my grown-up Christmas list”
“And right would always win”
This is a beautiful concept! Beautiful intention. But is it really practical? Is it really so simple? Is it even a possibility? It almost seems like a pompous claim or wish. But I know the people wishing it have great intentions. Some things may not be objectively right. What’s right to one may not be to another.
For example, capital punishment. To me, it doesn’t seem right that it’s up to the state or anyone to decide when someone must die, even a cold blooded murderer. Who are you and who am I or anyone to decide that someone else should die no matter what that person previously did? What gives us that kind of authority? It seems self-important, we think we are in a position to have someone die. But someone else’s conviction is just as strong that it’s wrong to NOT kill a cold blooded murderer. To allow a murderer to keep breathing after that person cruelly took someone else’s life? To protect and shelter and care for a murderer in prison when the poor victim never gets to see the light of day again? To give that person a chance to escape confinement and kill again? It’s unlikely but it has happened. Who is to say, in this case, which of us is really right? There are good arguments and well intentioned arguments on both sides. I don’t think we can come to an objective conclusion which is right. There are so many issues like this one where it’s just not clear and there are so many aspects.
To me “right” is choosing Love in every moment. Love even when we disagree. We can all stand up for the things we think are right while loving those who stand up for what they think is right even if we disagree with their concept of “right.”
My Grown Up Christmas List – Amy Grant – desktop
My Grown Up Christmas List – mobile
~ I’m not a child but my heart still can dream ~ ❤
So here it is! My grown up Christmas list!
What do you think? Anything you want to add? Let me know!
😀
Hugs & love,
Kim
(the pictures in this post are not mine, they are of a beautiful little girl named Sa’fyre Terry –
http://abcnews.go.com/US/girl-lost-family-fire-christmas-cards-presents/story?id=35675085 )
“In the eyes of a child there is joy, there is laughter
There is hope, there is trust, a chance to shape the future
For the lessons of life there is no better teacher
Than the look in the eyes of a child” ~ Air Supply
Yes, it is ok not to be perfect!
But this little baby IS beautiful just the way she is.
What a wise little girl. ❤
My sister told me about this sweet little Earth angel who she is going to send a card to and then I saw someone share her story on Facebook.
Isn't she just the cutest?!
She wants people to send her cards for Christmas.
She was burned in a tragic house fire where her family was killed.
I stare at her picture over and over and have nothing but love and compassion for her, not sorrow or pity. She doesn't need that. All she wants is LOVE and true love is seeing someone's beauty just the way it is.
One of my biggest dreams has been to do volunteer work in a burn unit for children. In the movie "Shallow Hal," the girl volunteers to work with little kids who have suffered burns. I always found that to be the sweetest thing and ever since I saw that movie, years ago, I decided I want to do that too!
I haven't been able to find any volunteer opportunities like that. Some volunteer jobs I found in similar settings require previous experience, which I don't have.
Hopefully one day though I will realize this dream! ❤ ❤
Some people have trouble looking at people who are seriously disfigured or deformed but I just cannot have that trouble because I feel too connected to others to see them as anything but beautiful, to see them as anything unlike myself. That body, that face, scarred or disfigured or deformed or flawless is a part of who they are. It's hard to explain in words but the closest I can come to explaining is their face or body is a big part of them like mine is a big part of me and I would never want someone to have difficulty looking at me and I'm sure no one else wants that either. What is the difference if my face is flawless or scarred or deformed? It's mine and inside I am still me. Just like all of us.
We are much more than what we look like but how we look is a part of us and it's good to embrace it and each other.
I am no different than this little girl. She has emotions, dreams, goals, interests, love, joy, pain, sorrow, happiness, scars, perfections, needs, desires, life, beauty…just like me.
When I look at her, I see a reflection of my own self.
My struggle with depression and severe facial pain & headaches has always inspired me to feel deeper connections to people with both seen and invisible disabilities.
A person with a physical scar or deformity may not feel the same or agree with me and I understand but my severe facial pain disorder, though it can't be seen, has always allowed me to feel a strong identification with others with facial disorders and even physical scars, deformities, birthmarks.
Mine cannot be seen but it's just as real. Mine is physical but also brings with it deep emotional scars and pain. It even hurts me to write or think about it.
But we all have basic empathy and can tune into it and strengthen it whether we have a disability or not. We don't need depression or any other disorder to empathize with others. But those things can help. We can all draw on our own experiences, both pleasant and painful, to identify with each other.
Also, at any second, any one of us can be slashed, scarred, disfigured, burned. And we would still be us. Would you want someone to cringe when those people look at you? Whether or not your face is disfigured, imagine a person having difficulty, emotionally, looking at you. It's not pleasant.
Not everyone who can't bring themselves to look at someone with a deformity or disfigurement is cold or cruel. Some are but most probably aren't. We aren't used to seeing things like that and often when a person is scarred or disfigured, it's the result of a serious injury and that's what often comes to mind when we see the scars. It doesn't make us callous or horrible if we have the urge to look away or cringe or stare but that can be overcome through tuning into our empathy and strongly identifying with the person. That person is not unlike someone with a perfect face. We are the same, we are One.
For this little girl, we can do more than just send her cards. We can live a life of compassion and empathy and learn to see the beauty of every single person we lay eyes on or encounter in any way. Even if we do nothing to help in a practical way, having a loving, compassionate attitude, essence, is very helpful and can contribute to us acting in loving ways consciously and unconsciously. Loving energy is very good. People sense our energy/vibration. Let's make it one of Love. All encompassing Love.
“You’ve found the place to walk the path you’ve chosen
You’ll never miss the world you’ve left behind
When life gives life, it’s happiness unbroken
When you give love, it’s love you’ll find” ~ Air Supply
Two of the most beautiful things are self confidence and compassion for others.
It's beautiful when a woman with a big scar on her chest can still wear revealing clothing, when a person with a facial scar still shows her/his face knowing people will stare and whisper, when a person not considered society's definition of beautiful will still have the courage to dress how she wants, when a person with gray hair embraces it instead of covering it just for what others may think, when a woman with no hair as a result of a medical/health condition doesn't feel the need to wear a wig or scarf just because other people will think something unpleasant, it's beautiful when we overlook all the trivialities and see beauty in places it's not considered to be, when we embrace each other in our love.
It's ok to conceal our imperfections for us if it's truly what we desire. A person who is confident may still just wish to cover or get rid of something undesirable to that person and that's ok. But it's not something we should feel the need to do because of what others may think.
Cosmetic surgery, hair dye, wigs, makeup, anti-aging creams, weight loss techniques…there's nothing wrong with it and it's not necessarily an indication that someone is insecure or lacks self love.
Some people just desire some changes. But I don't think it's something we should do out of fear or embarrassment for what society or others think. I think those things are best when done for our own selves because it's what we want based on our own desire, not the desire or demands or rules of someone else.
Even if we do not know a person or any living sentient being we come across, we know enough to love that being. We know that living, sentient being, just like us, is someone, someone with pleasure, joy, and pain, fear, hunger, someone with the need to avoid suffering and the desire for happiness or absence of suffering.
We can not tell jokes about people's physical appearance, we can choose not to be shallow and judge based on physical appearance, we can choose to see how we are all connected. We can choose to genuinely compliment someone when someone else slings insults. We can choose to seek what is good in each other and forgive the less than good.
I have much sympathy for the little girl who lost her family in a fire and I have so much sorrow for all the lives lost. Her daddy covered her with his body to save her life. He did not survive. The little girl does have a family, even if not the whole one she was born into, but she has people who love and care for her and now all the people around the world who encountered her story and love her. Family isn't just biological or legal.
Sa’fyre’s aunt says this about her:
“She’s a living message to people that there’s hope, and no matter what you can get through anything,” Dolder said. “That’s why we share Sa’fyre with everyone.”
What a gem this little girl is! ❤
This little darling girl inspires me so deeply! She is so happy and positive and adorable! She looks so cute in her little Christmas clothes! I’m so happy she chose to put her story out into the world and to show her beautiful face, to touch so many lives with her young life.
I am so thankful she survived.
I’m also so thankful she still has her sense of vision, that it wasn’t completely destroyed. And thankful for her beautiful smile. 😀
I’m so thankful to her family for bringing her into the world and for sharing her with us. ❤
I hope we will cherish the lives of all sentient beings and wish the best for everyone. By best I am referring to happiness and inner peace no matter the circumstances.
“When you look to the past for life’s long hidden meaning
For the dreams and the plans made in your youth
Does the thrill to achieve match the warm hidden feeling
That lies so still and lives in you”
The Eyes of a Child – Air Supply – mobile
Beautiful song that brings chills!
Much love & light to you, always. ❤ ❤
xoxo Kim ❤