It was a pleasant surprise. I had no idea I would be in a morgue today lol
I was trying to be discreet about taking pictures. Lol I would have taken more, but it was awkward 😆
It was cold in there.
This is one of the freezers and a gurney they lay the organ donors on.
I did not see any bodies. They were going to show us a kidney being pumped, getting ready for donation, but they send all the kidneys to Penn Hospital now.
This is a morgue only for kidney/tissue donors (just tissue now). There are a couple operating rooms in there where they remove them for donation. They also have the consent rooms where they take the families in to consent to donating their family member’s organ. It’s very sweet, whenever a family says “yes,” the staff puts a butterfly sticker up on the windows of the consent rooms, to honor the organ donor and the family’s gift of life.
I saw the elevator where the bodies are brought up. It’s a different elevator than the ones the living people use. It’s interesting because I have been around that building frequently at all different parts of the day, for many years, and have never seen a body being taken in or out. I have, very rarely, seen kidneys/tissue coming out in coolers to be taken to hospitals for transplant. But never a full body.
This morgue was specifically for kidney & tissue donors, but, now, they just do tissue.
Happy, Happy Birthday, Lefty!! 🫘💚💙 And many, many more!! 🥳🎊🎉🍻 🎂
I lit the candle for my dogs because they get special treats for every single special occasion and holiday. As soon as they see a cake with a candle lit, they go wild, yelling for their special treat. They know the words “cake” and “birthday.” So, this was a “birthday” for them, too. Lol
“To save one life, it’s as if you saved the world.”
(Content warning ⚠️: There’s a picture of a human kidney in this post at the end lol)
January 16th.
My favorite day of the year! The one day a year where it’s still appropriate for me to brag years later 😆 To everyone else, it’s old news now, but, to me, it never gets old lol
Each day leading up to 1/16, I can’t wait. It’s like having two birthdays, except even better. I even buy myself a cake and gift to celebrate the best thing I ever did.
On 1/16/2024, I donated one of my kidneys to a stranger.
It was my calling and lifelong dream.
It was a gift given out of love for my fellow human & sentient being without care about what person were to receive it. The less suffering in the world, the better.
I knew the potential benefits to a recipient outweigh the rare potential short-term & long-term risks to myself. And even if I were to experience one, at least it’s because I tried to help someone. I could never regret it (Unless I find out he’s a Cowboys fan 😆 JK, I always have to throw that joke in somewhere, I even wrote it in my thank you letter to my transplant team lol)
My decision was inspired by a true story I read many years before, about a man who donated his kidney to an anonymous stranger. I thought it was the most beautiful thing I ever read, to give a literal piece of himself to save another.
I instantly knew I would do the same one day. Almost two decades later, I did! If I have more than enough of something for me, it makes complete sense to give some to someone who needs it.
Two men were saved through my one kidney donation. I volunteered to give my kidney to whoever needed it and was a match for me. It was an anonymous donation that was given to “the next person on the wait list.”
I share a set of kidneys with a 50 something year old man in Minnesota. I love to joke that I’m in two places at once and can pee for two 😆
Because I donated through the National Kidney Registry, I was given a kidney voucher to give to anyone in the country I wanted. I chose someone who wasn’t close enough to the top of the deceased wait list but was in urgent need. I did not know anyone who needed a new kidney and so gave it to another stranger I heard needed one.
He was brought into the system to receive an anonymous living donor kidney because I gave him the voucher. He got the kidney of a living person who was donating for someone who isn’t a match for that person.
My kidney voucher recipient, Greg, received his new kidney just over a year after my non-directed donation!
Coincidentally, we live only fifteen minutes apart and are a match!
So, I was going to donate to him directly, before an anonymous recipient was chosen for me. But, he had some more work before being cleared for transplant, so I moved forward with non-directed donation.
We are now good in-person friends!
We have similar views and values and some similar interests and sense of humor. I wasn’t planning on becoming friends with either of my recipients. Just planned on helping someone and going on my way with no strings attached. But we have become good friends and turned out to have much in common!
I have no contact with the person who has the kidney I gave. Maybe one day!
I think of both of my recipients as my kidney brothers. 💙
It was and still is the most incredible thing I ever did. I had no idea the significant change it would inspire in me. A change that has become even more prominent as the years go by.
My intention was only to help someone, but in the process, it also changed me for the better.
No one else can see it on the outside, but on the inside, I am forever changed. It has become so much an ingrained & essential part of my identity that it’s like I wouldn’t even be the me I am now without this experience. Sometimes, it’s like nothing else even matters when I think of it.
It serves as a kind of buffer against the stresses and disappointments and tragedies of life. Whenever I feel something dragging me down, I remember this, and it pulls me right back up. It brings me comfort in situations where I would be inconsolable. When my depression flares up with feelings of worthlessness & insecurity, I remember my own life literally, physically, saved someone else’s, and am reminded of how powerful & valuable each life is, and I push through, knowing I can do even more good.
When I look around at all the tragedy & destruction in the world, all the hatred and wrongs and evil, I am reminded that I did the absolute best I could to counter that, by loving my fellow humans in the ultimate way there is to love: Showing them that their own life matters enough for me to risk my own to save theirs, no matter who they are.
I’m like a colorful 3d version of what used to be a grey stick figure. It made me better in a general way. Even when I’m not consciously thinking about it, I can feel it.
It’s not that I was unhappy before or anything like that, it’s just the experience added so much depth to me in a way that’s unimaginable & indescribable. But I tried my best to put it into words.
I wrote a very long (you know me with the paragraphs long essays 😆) thank you letter to my transplant team at Penn Hospital before being released as a patient recently (we stay a patient for two years after our donation surgery). They loved it.
I would like to share part of that letter here:
I used to think of living kidney donation in a limited way, that it helps someone live, and their friends and family get to still have them around. And that was motivation enough for me to regift one of mine.
But, after this experience, I began to realize it’s so much more expansive than that. Countless things are going to happen when a person’s life is saved or changed that would never happen if they weren’t saved or changed for the better. It has an unfathomable and boundless ripple effect.
That person will go on to do things that will contribute to an infinite amount of other things. They’ll do work, engage in acts of kindness, have many encounters with various people, develop relationships, maybe have kids, and those kids will do an infinite number of things, on & on. When one person is saved, their life will have a limitless impact on the world, there’s no telling how many more will be helped, touched, or saved in various ways because that one person’s life was spared.
Even way into the very distant future, the impact of our choice to donate our kidney could still be existing even if it doesn’t involve the recipient or donor anymore. This isn’t just true for organ donation but any choice we make. Any choice, good or bad, any act of kindness, can have a lasting effect we can’t foresee and may never know.
This is true for every single one of us. We all impact everything around us in ways we may never know. Each impact we have will go on to create more effects. On & on & on.
The decision we make to give life doesn’t only help our organ recipient and voucher recipient, if we have one, but every single life they go on to touch.
We have no idea how powerful our own life is, no matter who we are or what we do. Every little thing we do touches someone or something for better or for worse.
If the thread that is us was missing, the uni-verse would not be the same. Part of it would unravel. We’re all connected in an infinite amount of intricate ways we’ll never fully understand. We’re all a thread in the tapestry of life, holding each other together.
After giving my kidney to save a stranger’s life, I understand this now in a deep way I never did before. It’s so enlightening.
I love being part of the whole organ donation family and feel a sense of kinship & belonging with all the other donors, donor families, recipients, and their families.
My body “lost” a kidney, but I received so much more in return.
My kidney donation has given me this whole family, a new friend, an expanded life perspective, and most of all, the gift of seeing someone’s whole life change, dramatically, for the best.
Even though it wasn’t my intention or expectation, my experience with kidney donation truly has given me just as much as it has given those who received the gift of life out of it.
💚
That’s an “excerpt” out of my thank you letter to my healthcare team.
I dropped off a copy of it in person along with gifts, and gave six of the team members a copy, personally, the ones I worked with most closely. They were so thankful and said they were blown away!
My surgeon called me and asked for my permission to share it in a mass e-mail within the Penn network lol Of course, I said yes!
It took MANY people to come together to save the two who were saved by my kidney donation, not just me. It took their friends & family & others advocating for them and helping with resources, and all the healthcare workers involved. Both of them received a kidney not only because of me but because someone else donated a kidney also.
The man who shares my set of kidneys with me received mine because someone donated theirs for him to get mine. If it wasn’t for Greg’s family & friends sharing his need for a new kidney, that information would have never reached me.
That’s the beautiful thing about organ donation & kidney chains, it’s so life-affirming and shows just how valuable one life is, that countless people go to great lengths to save that life.
I get all the credit (lol), but, truly, we ALL played an equally crucial role. If just one of us was missing, things would be significantly different. It’s possible someone may not even be here today.
It’s a beautiful thing to be a small part of.
The scars have faded. But the joy and sense of relevance never fade no matter how much time goes by. It’s not on my mind as much as in the beginning, but it’s always with me, and when thoughts of it or reminders pop up, it’s like an instant dopamine surge. Like being in love & walking on air.
I truly, inadvertently, gave the absolute best gift to myself when I gave the gift of life to someone else.
At the end of this life, whenever it may be, this one decision alone makes my whole life a success.
I would make the same decision again & again.
I also thank my transplant team at Penn for trusting me to donate my kidney! I take the best care of my remaining kidney and am overly cautious with it. I don’t ingest anything that can hurt it without checking first and make sure to water it regularly!
I am just as healthy with one kidney as with two.
I share my story for three reasons, because it makes me happy, because it uplifts others to read/hear (who doesn’t like a good Hallmark-like story 😆), and because it brings visibility to organ donation and may hopefully inspire even just one person to become a living donor and/or register as a potential deceased donor.
There are a couple of people alive today because I read that story many years ago. If I just heard we can donate our kidney to a stranger, I may not have, I’m not sure. But reading a true story about someone, personally, who did, it made me see something in myself like that person and motivated me even years later.
You never know who you or your life may be inspiring!
I see my experience with the perspective of this amazing thing I got to experience more than look at this amazing thing I did for someone else. It’s better than I ever imagined it would be.
And two years later, it makes me even happier than when I first donated my kidney because it took a while to process and finally fully sink in, this profound & rare thing I did, because I have since become an organ donor ambassador with the Gift of Life Program in Philadelphia, bringing awareness to organ donation, and get to work with and connect with others who share my passion, and because now my kidney voucher recipient got his new kidney, and because we are now friends, which we weren’t really in the beginning.
We attend organ donation events together, living donor celebrations, do 3k walks for organ donation/kidney disease awareness…It just gets better & better.
Cheers to my kidney twin in Minnesota, and Happy Kidneyversary!! 🥂🎉🎊
Many, many more for the both of us 💚
Also, will celebrate my other kidney brother’s Kidneyversary coming up in early February!!
(Those things on my legs are not bruises and nothing contagious lol It looked much worse but is healing now. It’s an allergic reaction. It affects various parts of my body, my legs get hit the hardest. It’s literally impossible to avoid my trigger. Thankfully, it never affects my breathing, even though it can)
This was my FB post earlier, just sharing here!
Yesterday was a special day! It was the last day of my living kidney donation journey at Penn Transplant Institute!!
We stay a patient at the transplant center we donate at throughout our evaluation to become a living organ donor and then two years after the donation surgery, if we get accepted. Then, they let us go, and we’re on our own.
The first two years of medical test results after donation surgery is used for living kidney donation research. Our transplant team tracks our results to use for statistics & the future of living donation. It’s a requirement we have to agree to, to get accepted. We don’t pay for our medical testing the first two years or throughout our evaluation. The recipient’s health insurance does.
I was a patient there for almost three years 💚
My journey began in March 2023 when, at the spur of the moment, I filled out an application on a train one night after work, to give my kidney to anyone who needed it, and ended in January 2026, with a perfectly functioning solitary kidney, and two lives saved. 💙
I get this heartwarming feeling in my chest just writing this.
I loved every second of it and am going to miss it! It was nothing but happy & positive. It’s always uplifting to interact with the Penn staff, whether on a video call, through the patient portal, phone calls, or in person. I still remember so many of my interactions there and where I was when I got phone calls & messages.
Yesterday morning, I had my last appointment there.
It felt like a kind of graduation day. Lol Some (medical) tests and surveys for the last years, and now I’m done!
It feels like something being complete or accomplished. There was something very sentimental about my last day there. It made me think back to the beginning, the thrill of anticipation and new beginnings, always having this big thing to look forward to. Now, it’s already three years later!
I decided I should do something to celebrate 🥳 So, I bought myself a pretty and very inexpensive necklace at a boutique lol I chose a heart to represent my act of love. I’m not wearing it in this picture because I want to paint it with clear nail polish to preserve it as long as possible lol This necklace is one my recipient bought me (it doesn’t have to be painted lol)
I never had the perfect grades in school to be a student at UPenn. It’s one of those elite universities.
But I did have the perfect kidney to be a patient at the living donor center at UPenn hospital!
Just like the university, it’s very difficult to get accepted into Penn as a living donor, they’re very selective. They must have really wanted that kidney lol 😆
I got my two year kidney function test results! And then, we talked about my results at my appointment yesterday and how to keep my remaining kidney safe throughout life.
Once a year, I have to get medical tests to see how my remaining kidney is holding up after losing its counterpart. I also have a glucose test each year. And I have to have my blood pressure checked every six months or less.
Sometimes, after kidney donation, the remaining kidney fails, and the donor needs a transplant (This is VERY rare). It doesn’t always happen right away if it’s going to. It can happen at any point after donation surgery. It usually happens within the first ten years when it does happen. There’s never a point where we’re “out of the woods,” though.
We all know this before donating. They make it very clear. During the psych evaluation, they ask us how we would feel if we ever need a kidney transplant after donating ours.
Can’t say I would quite like it, but it was worth the risk. I would get to say it’s because I helped someone. So many are sick for no good reason. I would never regret it.
Someone else already needed a transplant NOW. I think of the fact that “maybe” I could need a kidney transplant later, as a privilege or “luxury” that someone else did not have. For someone else, there was no maybe.
So, we’re recommended to get lifelong tests once a year after leaving our transplant center. We can also become diabetic after donation. That’s the number one reason for kidney failure in the U.S. So we should have a glucose test at least once a year.
Anything that isn’t good for two kidneys is especially not good for only one. When there’s two kidneys, they each take a hit of whatever is a.ttacking them, so it’s split evenly. With only one, it takes it all on its own. This is why I’m generally keeping my sodium, protein, and added sugar low/in moderation.
Nothing tastes as good as healthy feels!
I have to avoid NSAIDS & herbal/vitamin supplements. It’s one of the very few lifelong restrictions.
Donating a kidney also puts us at an elevated risk for elevated blood pressure that can require medication to keep under control. And seriously elevated blood pressure can damage the kidneys. That can also develop at any point, even years after donation.
It’s not extremely uncommon to develop blood pressure problems after donation because the kidneys regulate blood pressure. Having one removed can result in needing medication to keep it under control.
So we need our blood pressure checked every six or less months.
If it does happen, it’s usually easy to manage. My diet & lifestyle are already conducive to having healthy blood pressure, and I have no family history of any problems. So, that lowers my risk, and if it does happen, medication would control it without me having to do much else.
Everyone can actually benefit by annual kidney & glucose checks and frequent blood pressure checks. Even with two healthy kidneys. It can happen to anyone. And many people have some elevated risk factors. There are often no symptoms at first. If we get regular checks, they can catch it before it’s too advanced.
Righty is holding its own!!
Two years later, and it still got it!
My solitary kidney is functioning perfectly and as expected! It’s kicking a.ss all on its own lol No concerns at all.
My glucose, on point. Not diabetic or prediabetic.
Everything else was checked, including my sodium, potassium, calcium….it’s all perfect. All within normal range.
My most recent blood pressure was 104/72. Perfect.
My body weight is perfect.
There was nothing in my test results even slightly off.
At my visit yesterday, we went over my general diet, lifestyle, any medications I take (none),…literal perfection. (with the exception of my dental issues lol)
They don’t want anything at all to change and want everything to remain stable. “If perfect’s what you’re searching for, then, just stay the same.” 😆 lol jk
Going into middle age (except I feel 25 years old lol) healthy as can be!
It’s like an early 40th b-day gift to find that I’m completely healthy. 💚
Health is the greatest wealth.
I thank my super kidney for holding up so well. It stepped up to the plate and picked up the slack, no problem! And still going strong after two years!
I’m thankful for my amazing health not only for the good it does me but what it allowed me to do for someone else. It’s a gift to be able to share it and make someone else healthy, too. If I had another one to give, I sure would! 💙
I loved my experience at Penn and am proud & honored to get to call myself one of their “alum.” Lol
Yesterday, at my last appointment with one of my transplant team members, she thanked me again for my kidney donation (and for the thank you letter & gifts I dropped off, recently). She said it was an amazing thing to do for the whole community. I loved hearing that. The impact of organ donation is expansive & lasting. It never loses its relevance no matter how many years later.
I love being part of this whole Penn living donor community. I woke up this morning with that sentimental feeling again of my patient journey there being over. But I’m always going to be part of the community and have a place there. (They even took our pictures to put up in their center and had us sign a living donor flag! I love that 💙)
I plan to keep in touch with the staff through the events that take place every year, like the organ donor walks and celebrations. They asked for my recipient and me to join them at the events. They LOVE our story.
During the holiday season, along with some gifts, I took them a pages-long thank you letter, sharing our entire heartwarming story and all the amazing things we can do after transplant/donation. They said they were all blown away! They said they don’t usually get to know the full story or situation of their living donors, just some details.
So, they loved getting to read our whole beautiful story. It brightened their day to receive the gifts and letter. My surgeon called me and asked for my permission to share it!
I encourage anyone who has had an amazing healthcare team or healthcare worker taking care of them or a family member, to give a small gift and/or thank you letter/card (if allowed, not all places allow their staff to accept gifts or even cards or letters, so checking with the hospital’s HR is best).
It can leave a lasting impact or just brighten the day of someone doing one of the most important kinds of work there is, saving lives. They may even remember it years later or be uplifted on a stressful day when they see or think of the reminder. I don’t think healthcare workers hear thank you enough even though they’re not expecting it.
I love that I was able to send a bit of joy & love to my team at the end of my journey, to say thank you.
It uplifted them even more than I realized, and they couldn’t thank me enough. I wasn’t even expecting a thank you at all! But a few of them called me on their own cell phones to thank me and told me again at my last appointment yesterday. Knowing this, I definitely recommend thank you gifts, cards, and/or letters to healthcare workers.
💙💚
And today is a BIG day! It’s my 2nd KIDNEYVERSARY/Lefty’s 2nd birthday!!! 🫘
I ordered a custom cake & gift for myself to celebrate. I can’t wait to open my gift later today lol It’s something I had custom-made on Etsy. I kept it in the package because I did not want to see it til my day! Never even saw a picture online since it’s custom-made.
In the back of my head, I kept thinking I was going to cave and rip it open sooner. Lol I’m like a little girl who can’t wait for her birthday gift. But I managed to make it to the day! I’ll share it later, along with the cake and an anniversary post or two. 🩷 I have to go pick the cake.
My dogs love birthdays and candles. They get special treats for EVERY special occasion and holiday. They know the word “cake” and “birthday.” When they see a candle being lit, they go wild, jumping around, barking, waiting for their special treat. So, I got them a special treat and decided to light a candle on the cake later, so they can get all happy lol It will be a “birthday” for them 😆😍
This is a screenshot response that someone wrote to me on a meme I shared in my last post here, this meme:
This is my response to that person’s response. I understand the person has good intentions, but I can’t say I agree that gun violence is ever good.
My response:
I do think of myself as the same as them. I am the same as them.
Differences in political & moral views are not significant enough, in my opinion, to make us fundamentally different. We’re essentially the same. Not only are we the same species, we’re all sentient. That makes us the same.
That “we’re not the same” philosophy I see so frequently on “both sides,” hinders our empathy and only serves to create more of a disconnect with each other.
I’m human just like them. I’m a sentient being just like they are. Like them, I can experience pain and suffering, and, like them, I gravitate towards relief and pleasure and life affirming things. I don’t want my head blown off any less than they do.
I’m truly no different than they (people with different political/moral views than me) are. And I’m no more worthy of life than they are. If it’s not ok to blow my head off while I’m walking up a street or talking to people, then it’s not ok to blow theirs off, in my opinion. It’s sentience that makes us worthy of life, not our goodness.
Some may argue that it’s for practical purposes that some people are killed, but I don’t believe it’s helping anything or going to stop their ilk. They’ll still be spewing their nonsense after people like them are killed. Research even shows that in places where capital punishment is practiced, there’s even more violence and nothing to show that killing “bad people” deters other ones.
If they’re so full of violent urges and hatred, it’s unlikely that killing them off in violent ways is going to make the surviving ones more peaceful and loving and accepting. It will just provoke more fury in them, motivating them to act with more violence either physically or verbally or politically. When Liberal/Progressive people kill a Conservative person or they assume the murderer is a Liberal, all it does is “confirm” for them that the Liberals are terrible people and that Liberalism has to be obliterated.
The only justification for blowing someone’s head off, in my opinion, is if that person is an imminent threat to me or to someone else, not just because they spew nonsense, even if the nonsense they spew is ultimately harmful. And it should always be a last resort.
I have progressive political views, pro equality for all minority groups…some people think that makes me a threat to society. That doesn’t mean one of those people can walk up and blow my head off out of the blue.
So, it’s the same with people who have views that I know are dangerous to society. I can’t just blow them to pieces because I don’t like their views. These Conservative people legit believe Liberals and minority groups are a serious threat to society and that they’re doing the greater good a favor when they kill us or strip us of our rights.
They truly feel justified in killing us off and/or trampling on our basic rights. But as we know, that’s not ok for them to do that just because they believe it’s helpful or that we deserve it. If we feel equally justified in killing them off because we know they’re a threat to us all, that doesn’t mean we’re right. It seems hypocritical to me. We get to decide who lives and who dies or who is worthy of the basic right to life and who isn’t. It doesn’t sit right with me.
Our convictions are equally strong, yet it’s ours that is right, just doesn’t make sense. I know the difference here is that they actually are a threat where we aren’t. But, still, I think it gets dangerous when we start subjectively coming up with excuses to kill people for their views. And I think there’s a better way to deal with them.
They experience fear and pain. They have things that make them happy. They have friends and family who love them. They have little kids and pets who need them and are traumatized over the loss…it’s not ok to decide that it’s our place to take their life away just because they have repulsive views.
We have to tackle their views and keep them out of positions of power (I know that’s very difficult to do and a complex issue and easier said than done), not murder them. There’s always going to be despicable people with corrupt views, trying to make life difficult for others. I believe there are better ways to deal with them than killing them. There are people who find me just as repulsive as I find these people (I received death wishes, was told I deserve to suffer the “worst pain imaginable” and be killed after being tortured “beyond recognition” and more because of my political views, told I deserve to be caught in a massacre at a Democratic event), that doesn’t give them consent to kill me. It works both ways.
Also, I don’t necessarily believe that when someone kills someone for political reasons that it’s always for practical purposes. I think it’s often out of anger and “payback,” which is never wise to act on. I see many people rejoicing in a vengeful way when a political figure is shot dead, that shows it’s not just for practical purposes.
Having to kill someone, in my opinion, is never a happy matter. I get having to kill someone sometimes or not mourning for certain people when they die, because of how terrible they were. But there’s people just getting off on their deaths. That’s ok if that’s their inner experience. It’s not really my place to tell people how they should and shouldn’t feel about something. Especially when it’s an oppressed person rejoicing over the fact that one of their oppressors is dead.
Who am I to tell a trans person or a gay person or an African American/black person or a woman not to be happy someone who was working to kill them or take away their basic human rights is dead? But we can’t be acting on it or promoting killing for revenge. I believe for practical purposes, to make the country/world better for all, we should teach and promote more peaceful ways than killing.
Decisions, especially ones that have to do with ending someone’s life, should always be made, intellectually, and while in a rational state of mind.
Society isn’t going to progress by blowing each other’s heads off.
I picked up the morning paper The headlines were no surprise A random act of senseless violence Was committed again last night It seems the whole world has gone crazy And something needs to be done So, starting today, I’m gonna find a way I’m gonna repay someone With a random act of senseless kindness Unexpected hand to help remind us A little bit of love is a cure for hate It’s easy to give up, but it’s never too late A single step in the right direction Person to person making a connection We can change the world that’s become so violent With a random act of senseless kindness
Happy, healthy, joyful, full of energy 💕 This is a recent pic of me.
1.) The season changing! Bring on the pumpkin everything, the cool nights, all the Fall decor, the crunchy leaves, the cozy sweater weather, the horror movies (I watch them all year, but they have an extra thrill to them in the Fall) 🎃🍁🍂
2.) A scary movie I’m going to watch the rest of tonight. I tried watching it last night and fell asleep. I think it’s called “Bad Influence.“
3.) Meeting up with my friend soon for his birthday! I’m taking him out to breakfast at a cafe we both love! 💕
4.) An e-mail someone sent me, complimenting me! I volunteer as an organ donation ambassador with The Gift of Life Program in Philadelphia, and the director told me I’m a delight to work with! Made my day lol
5.) These vegan low cost protein shakes I just discovered at the Amazon grocery store that just opened up close to where I work! Delicious & healthy
It’s the little things! 😍
Share yours here if you want!
This post was meant for yesterday, but I forgot to share it lol
In my opinion, our compassion is best when it embraces all sentient beings.
Reasons:
1.) Our suffering is all the same whether we’re good or bad. 2.) At best, suffering does the world no good, and at the worst, it makes the world worse for everyone 3.) Ultimately, the “bad people” are like victims of their circumstances- this is not to say we have no choice, but our choices are often influenced by various factors, our mental health, our life circumstances, our upbringing, our culture, our privilege or lack of… and sometimes without us fully realizing the consequences or that we have other options. I don’t believe that under the best circumstances, anyone would essentially choose to be a terrible person. 4.) Our own minds are more peaceful when we wish others well.
This post is inspired by all the (understandable) enthusiasm I have been seeing about Donald Trump’s medical condition and all the wishes that more bad things happen to him.
I don’t believe he can be rehabilitated. I believe he’s a bad person and that there’s no hope for him. I am not one of those loving people who believe everyone is truly good and that everyone can be rehabilitated with lots of love and care. I think Donald Trump was born with the predisposition for being a “bad person.”
His condition reminds me of my condition, but mine is not serious. It can be painful but is not life or health threatening. I have jugular vein insufficiency and insufficiency of a few other veins in my neck because of an obstruction in my head. The obstruction is also not life threatening. The blood leaving my brain to go to my heart through these veins, can’t get there because of the veins being impinged on. So, the blood backs up into my head. Many veins are all doing the same job, so it doesn’t matter. It’s harmless. The blood is still getting to my heart.
I have recurring unbearable headaches associated with it, though. The headaches are 10/10 pain, at least within their own context. I guess when compared to some other kinds of pain, they would be less than 10 on a pain level scale. But like within the context of headaches. They bring me to the floor. I have been bedridden for days sometimes. I think it’s the obstruction itself that causes the headaches, not the vein insufficiency or blood backing up. That can cause severe pain, too, though, among many other things. When I have these headaches or think of them, my empathy for others becomes boundless.
Mine doesn’t cause swelling, but you can see the jugular vein bulging out of my neck. I had to have scans a couple of years ago to see why it was suddenly protruding and so prominent. The doctors were concerned it could be a blood clot somewhere causing it. But it turned out to be nothing serious. I convinced myself I was dying and had six months left to live (certain kinds of cancer can cause it to bulge, and when it’s to that point, the average person only lives around six months. I convinced myself I had that), and my heart rate and blood pressure were through the roof in a doctor’s office. They had to tell me to calm down and to stay off Google 😆
I don’t want him as President, he’s absolutely repulsive. He has no redeeming qualities. None. But I don’t wish him or anyone to be sick. I don’t believe anyone deserves to be sick any more than I do. We are all equal in our suffering and in our comfort. The goodness or lack of it in us, is irrelevant in this context. If Donald Trump was afflicted with one of my headaches, he would suffer the same as me. All sentient beings essentially want to live and be healthy. We all suffer the same. The headaches this brings me, I would wish on absolutely no one. I literally cannot bear the mere thought of someone else, even him, enduring what I do when a headache hits.
I believe the world would be a significantly better place if everyone was happy (not at the expense of others, but sincerely happy) & healthy. It’s people who are unhappy and hurt who hurt others. Happy, well rounded, people don’t go around tormenting anyone else. There are absolutely people who get off on hurting others (he’s one of them), it makes them happy. But that’s not genuine happiness, it’s happiness that often relieves whatever unhappiness that afflicts them. If they were genuinely happy, they would not inflict pain upon others.
❤️
Most of us have probably experienced this on a lesser scale, like for example, when we’re in a bad mood so we get snippy with someone when it’s not warranted. It’s displaced anger or annoyance. We may not usually do this, even when unhappy, but most of us have probably more than once been less than kind, when in a bad mood, to someone who did not deserve it. These people, though, live a life of that because they are always unhappy and are the kind of people who want others to suffer, too.
I don’t believe that everyone is basically good. But I think their lack of goodness is the result of their own suffering. Some people are born (and maybe upbringing often plays a part, but I think they have inherent or genetic inclination for it to begin with) never developing basic human abilities/emotions, like the ability for empathy and compassion. This does not result in true happiness. It results in the desire to hurt others, it brings them a superficial happiness. Donald Trump hurts everyone. And he gets off on it. He loves it. But we see he’s not a happy person.
Why do we think bitter, miserable people often insist on hurting others? Because it brings them relief or pleasure. They are seeking what we all seek. It’s just for them, their suffering influences it.
Wishing further suffering on them has no practical benefits. If anything, it only serves to perpetuate their abuse as their own suffering is the source of it anyway, and it doesn’t make our own mind any more positive or loving. It may bring us a moment of satisfaction again & again. But I don’t think it has any real value. At least wishing others well has potential to bring us inner peace, and then we’re more likely to interact positively with others.
Not all seemingly terrible people really are. Unlike Donald Trump, some can change. It’s dependent on the reason they are how they are.
I believe that if we were all given the choice before being born, to be a good and happy person or a bad and suffering person who goes to great lengths to inflict that suffering upon others, all of us would have chosen to be happy and healthy and good and someone who wishes that for every other being as well. Ultimately, no one chooses to be what Donald Trump is. Yes, he chooses to do bad things within the confines of the existence he was given. He’s a despicable person. Nothing changes that. But I don’t believe for a second that he would have chosen this if the uni-verse gave him a choice when he was still a “clean slate” if ever he even was. He was born suffering or was brought up to suffer, and now he wants the rest of us to suffer along with him.
Some people’s suffering inspires deeper empathy for others, but for others, it doesn’t, it has the opposite effect and inhibits empathy instead.
As the cliche goes, “Hurt people, hurt people.”
Suffering begets more suffering.
This doesn’t mean we always have to speak warm & kindly to everyone. Sometimes, people have to be told off & judged harshly and not get what they want. Some people need a firm ass kicking. It just means we don’t have to wish suffering upon them.
I believe it does no good to wish pain & suffering on others.
I wish he was happy & healthy and not born a psychopath. Me wishing that does no practical good either, though. But I think the world would be better and most of us more peaceful if more of us wished good things on people instead of bad.
People have countered my sentiment, saying anger & hatred fuel us to act for good. While that is sometimes true, compassion & love can fuel us just the same. Anger & hatred feel unpleasant and can get out of control and influence us to do things that are destructive to ourselves and others. Love & compassion can never go wrong. As I said, it doesn’t necessarily have to be warm and sappy and “feel good” feelings. It can be firm & harsh but still love. When anger & hatred frequently consume us, it leads to stress, depression, anxiety, physical ailments. When compassion & love consume us, it only leads to good.
I don’t know the source of this quote, the name here may not be accurate. I also see it attributed to Shantideva.
I have wished bad things on people before, and I probably will again. But that’s not the philosophy I hold, it’s when I give into raw emotion that I allow to overtake me and blind me. I always find my way back to me, the authentic me who knows the truth, that wishing suffering on others isn’t the way.
If I could, I would flip a switch and turn all the suffering in the world off, even for “bad people.” I would in a heartbeat.
Think about it, there must be higher love Down in the heart or hidden in the stars above Without it, life is a wasted time Look inside your heart, I’ll look inside mine Things look so bad everywhere In this whole world, what is fair? We walk blind, and we try to see Falling behind in what could be
Bring me a higher love Bring me a higher love Bring me a higher love Where’s that higher love I keep thinking of?
Write about a random act of kindness you’ve done for someone.
Years ago, like 20+ years ago, I was taking a college psychology class, and I met a girl who was taking the same class with the same professor but a different part of the day than me. So, we weren’t in class together. She did not have the money to buy the text book. My dad bought my books for me. So, in the evenings, I would write out the portions of the book she needed for assignments, exams, and quizzes in an e-mail and send it to her. It was very time consuming. I’m not even sure if that’s legal, likely not as it was enough for her to not have to buy the book. But it helped her immensely, and I don’t regret it lol I know what it’s like to not have enough money for something essential. And I remember having no idea what I would do if my dad did not buy my books. Where do they think an 18 year old is going to get $500+?
Back then, these phones with the cameras and all weren’t really a thing or as popular yet. And I had no scanner and never really thought of making copies somewhere, which would have been much easier. So, I spent hours just sitting there writing the text out for a complete stranger I never even met face to face.
I met her in a group online where she wrote that she couldn’t buy the book yet and was desperate for help and pleaded with anyone to send her the content. I could feel the desperation in her posts. She had no idea what to do. No one else responded, so I did. Saved her ass 😆
I love posts like this because it’s uplifting & heartwarming & inspiring to see the goodness in humans. When we share our acts of kindness, it can inspire others to be kind or just brighten their day.
(I have sunscreen & olive oil on my skin/hair, so if I look greasy, that’s why 😆)
I’m bleeding out So if the last thing that I do Is bring you down I’ll bleed out for you So I bare my skin And I count my sins And I close my eyes And I take it in I’m bleeding out I’m bleeding out for you, for you
I donated platelets! Just eight days after donating whole blood!
This is my first platelet donation in a few years.
It takes hours hooked up to a machine with a needle and tube in both arms, for platelet donation. We’re restrained and can only move our legs and neck. The arms have to lay straight, can’t bend them or anything, the tubes in each one are hooked up to a machine. Can’t even look at our phone because we can’t hold anything. They do put a movie on for us. I watched “Jaws,” and the Red Cross nurse said “You picked a hell of a movie to watch while donating blood.” 🤣
Getting an itch or runny nose is the worst, there’s nothing that can be done about it. Just have to let the snots drip and itch go unscratched. I have allergies, so I tend to sneeze/get a runny nose. If you sneeze, you can’t cover your mouth & nose lol Awkward
The machine takes our blood through one arm and takes the platelets out of the blood, then it puts the rest of our blood back into our body through the other arm. They also have to inject us with stuff to reduce risk of blood clot and whatever else. It’s very, very, very rare, but I recently learned there’s a risk of death while donating platelets or any blood, even the simple whole blood routine. Say what??? Apparently, the risk is so low it’s not even worth mentioning to us, but I read it online.
It’s freezing cold when donating platelets. It’s something to do with whatever is happening to the body. It happens to anyone who donates platelets. It feels like being in a freezer even if the room is heated. They put a heated blanket on us and give us hand warmers, but eventually the heat runs out. We can probably request more.
They said most people don’t have this problem, but it makes me sick and lightheaded. Platelet donation always has. I feel like I’m going to pass out, even laying down. The feeling comes & goes throughout the donation. When I walk out after it’s over, I feel “under the weather.” I’m also all stiff because of not moving for hours. It also makes my whole face tingle and my fingertips. I don’t have this experience when donating whole blood, which is what I usually donate. I think it’s side effects of whatever they’re injecting me with, not the loss of platelets/blood doing this. There was one point where I thought, yeah, I’m not doing this again. Ever. Like ever. The next day, I’m back to my usual self.
The Red Cross said they need my platelets more now because of the ongoing platelet shortage crisis. We can donate once a week. They said the platelet crisis is extreme, there are so many more in need than are donating.
I guess I’m going to have to suck it up.
Me, after donating whole blood recently. (Again, the oily look is because I put various things on to protect my hair & skin against the elements)
It’s amazing that there are people sitting there hooked up to a machine for hours having parts of their body taken out for complete strangers. The Red Cross doesn’t pay their donors, but they occasionally give gifts and prize opportunities. They especially love platelet donors (and O blood donors because it’s the most needed blood type). The donors are getting nothing tangible out of it.
I was pleasantly surprised at how many other platelet donors were in there donating.
For the people who say people suck and there are no more good people, let’s remember our platelet donors. They are laying there for hours on a machine, some every week, giving parts of their own body away for people they’ll never meet. They aren’t just giving their body parts away but a significant amount of their time and some of their own comfort & health. And getting nothing in return.
I’m not a dedicated platelet donor, but there are people who are. There are people who haven’t missed a donation in many years. I would like to donate once a week and have tried before, but they said my body doesn’t produce enough platelets to keep giving them away. It only really makes enough for itself. Stingy bone marrow. Lol I also don’t want to risk becoming anemic, which can happen with frequent blood donation. I probably won’t donate every week, but if I have enough, I’ll try to frequently.
Donated platelets often go to cancer patients and organ transplant patients when theirs are too low.
I’m glad I donated, and even though it kind of makes me sick, it also uplifts me to know it’s going to help someone else, likely cancer patients. They have to sit in a chemo chair every week and a platelet transfusion chair, having no choice, I’m just in the donation chair, which is a gift. The least I can do is share that fortune with someone else. That’s the thought that motivates me to keep going. 💚
